Author Topic: OK Pinch me......but not yet!!  (Read 1737 times)

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Offline Stilllearning

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OK Pinch me......but not yet!!
« on: November 26, 2013, 10:04:33 AM »
I cannot believe it!  About a week ago my DS contacted me and said that he, his wife and their new baby would like to spend Thanksgiving Day here!  This will be the first time in years that he has been here for Thanksgiving and the first time ever for the other two.  There followed several text messages offering choices about what I would cook that would fit in with her rather restrictive diet because I do not want to fix a meal and have her not eat (happened once).  I was still trying to let that soak in when my DIL texted me this morning asking for me to babysit tomorrow!  They are going to let me keep the new grand ( 3 months old) overnight!!  They are planning a big day tomorrow with her family.  A separate Thanksgiving celebration to be followed by a movie (during which I would babysit) and when she asked how late they could pick the little darling up I suggested the overnight.  I still don't believe that she said yes!

 I think that lately she has been comparing monster-in-law stories with her married friends.  At the hospital when we visited one of her friends compared me to her MIL and said we were not near as intrusive as her IL's were.  So.....

Thank you, thank you, thank you!!  When I was going crazy you calmed me down!  If it were not for this wonderful site and all of you incredible women (especially Louise!) I doubt that this would be happening.  The harder he pulled away the more hurt I felt and the more desperate I got.  Nothing changed until I pulled away and I could not have done that without you!  I will never forget the feeling I had when I found this site.  What a relief to know that I was not alone!  I had never even considered that I had a life to enjoy with or without them!!  I don't call them, text them, email them or accept all of their invitations.  I have a life and I will not stop everything to be a part of their life.  If they call I am happy, if not I am happy.  Thanks so much!!!!!
Your mind is a garden your thoughts are the seeds
You can grow flowers or you can grow weeds.
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Offline Pooh

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Re: OK Pinch me......but not yet!!
« Reply #1 on: November 26, 2013, 10:21:56 AM »
That is absolutely wonderful!  Congrats SL and may your Thanksgiving be wonderful!
We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us. -
Joseph Campbell

Offline DixieDarling

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Re: OK Pinch me......but not yet!!
« Reply #2 on: November 26, 2013, 04:14:55 PM »
How wonderful. So happy for you dear. I truly hope you and your grand baby have a fantastic visit and thanksgiving is spent with laughter and hugs.

Offline Pen

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Re: OK Pinch me......but not yet!!
« Reply #3 on: November 26, 2013, 09:51:57 PM »
That is great news! Take a deep breath, go slowly...and enjoy this precious time. Happy Thanksgiving!
Respect ... is appreciation of the separateness of the other person, of the ways in which he or she is unique.
-- Annie Gottlieb

Offline herbalescapes

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Re: OK Pinch me......but not yet!!
« Reply #4 on: November 29, 2013, 07:15:00 PM »
Well, can we pinch you yet?  Hope it all went well.  It's great to hear a positive outcome once in awhile.  Keeping my fingers crossed for you.

Offline Stilllearning

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Re: OK Pinch me......but not yet!!
« Reply #5 on: November 30, 2013, 06:11:00 AM »
Oh my goodness.....what a day!!  We had a wonderful time babysitting and she was such an easy child to take care of! 

I hope I finally met my real DIL.  She is so different from the girl I knew that I feel at a loss.  I have no idea who that other person was but I am really glad she did not show up on Thanksgiving.  I know having a baby changes you and I was really looking forward to seeing how it would change them but I did not expect this.  We had actual conversations.  Pleasant ones!  About real things. And we actually agreed about things.  What happened to the self centered girl my DS married?  I have no idea if it was the child or the therapy but something worked.  I hope things do not revert.  It is nice to see some of what my DS saw all along.  It is sad that we had to go through all of this but hopefully it is behind us.  Thank you all for your support!
Your mind is a garden your thoughts are the seeds
You can grow flowers or you can grow weeds.
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wisewomanalso

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Re: OK Pinch me......but not yet!!
« Reply #6 on: December 03, 2013, 09:43:00 AM »
So nice that you had the opportunity and I wish you many, many more.

It is such a joy to hear that a grandmother wants so much to spend time with their grandchildren.  I wish I had that for my children - especially my youngest.

He is now 11 and has never once spent the night over at a grandparents house.  Not because of us but we just never had DH's parents offer and my dad and mom are deceased and prior to my mom's death, she wasn't able.

Just love that everything is working out and yes - children change us in so many ways :).

Offline Pen

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Re: OK Pinch me......but not yet!!
« Reply #7 on: December 03, 2013, 03:07:13 PM »
SL, sounds like great strides forward for you & DIL. Sending good thoughts towards continuing friendship and quality time together.
Respect ... is appreciation of the separateness of the other person, of the ways in which he or she is unique.
-- Annie Gottlieb