When I first met my MIL, she treated me very nice, and I could tell that she wanted to form a friendship with me, and I was more than happy to be receptive to that. I grew to love her, she was like a second mother to me. Around the time when my DH and I got engaged, she started to act differently. There was a lot of tension in the air it seemed, and she would get snappy with me. I couldn't figure out why, and I would try to ignore it and figured it was just my imagination. After the marriage, things were never the same. She said we weren't visiting her enough and several times screamed at me that I was destroying her family. There was no difference in the amount of visits we were making pre or post marriage, so I couldn't understand it. When we would meet her for dinner, she would show up at hour or more late, with her phone turned off so we couldn't find out what was going on. She would outright insult me and call me names, and so, after a couple years of that, we did start visiting less. Of course, that just made her more mad, but what could I do? I felt like there was no way to please her. Eventually, my MIL told my DH that she no longer wanted anything to do with him. He's still in contact with his brothers, but I wish we could fix things with his mom. Several times I have reached out to her to say "lets forget the past and move forward", but she doesn't return my calls. I'm not sure how to get through to her, and I don't want to come off as desperate. Maybe we're better off without her, but I would like to have a relationship with her.