Author Topic: A Motherless DIL  (Read 3053 times)

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Re: A Motherless DIL
« Reply #15 on: August 23, 2011, 09:36:15 AM »
Also, I guess it obvious that I don't have a clue how to copy/paste messages here.  I'm just doing the regular edit copy/edit paste that I know.  How does it work with this forum?

Offline Pen

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Re: A Motherless DIL
« Reply #16 on: August 23, 2011, 09:41:51 AM »
Doe, hi!

You can hit the Quote button and the message you want to reply to will be at the top of your "Post reply" writing area. If you only want to quote a portion of that message, highlight the bits you don't want & delete them while keeping the brackets and code intact at the beginning and end. Then move your cursor outside the brackets and type your comments. Hit "Preview" to see if it looks correct before posting. Hope this helps.
Respect ... is appreciation of the separateness of the other person, of the ways in which he or she is unique.
-- Annie Gottlieb

Offline pam1

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Re: A Motherless DIL
« Reply #17 on: August 23, 2011, 09:54:42 AM »
Pam writes:

So, we both come from different backgrounds and I'm sure to his FOO that I come across as cold.  Heck, they told me I do!

I can't fathom this!  Just from the few messages I've read from you here, I can't imagine a cold Pam.

LOL, I was shocked when they told me this too!  But they did have a point, I am uncomfortable around them when the fighting is going on or even more so, when they draw me into a fight.  My natural response is to withdraw so it does come across that I'm a cold person to them.  I also can see how it comes across that I don't care b/c in some ways, I don't.  It's hard to explain b/c I do care about their feelings but I don't care to listen to what I consider unnecessary drama.  For me, it is necessary.  So, we are at a stalemate.

To me, it's like wow, it's a beautiful Sunday afternoon.....what I'm doing here?  Listening to all this drama?  I wanna go outside and play!

People throw rocks at things that shine - Taylor Swift

Offline herbalescapes

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Re: A Motherless DIL
« Reply #18 on: August 23, 2011, 12:43:05 PM »
A close friend of mine had her mom die in her teen years.  Friend admits she looked toward her MIL to fill in that Mother-Daughter relationship, but MIL had several daughters so that never really happened.  I've wondered if part of friend's inlaw difficulties have stemmed from her having an unrealistic expectation.  As a good friend, I don't mention this to her.  I am the supportive "I can't believe those people!" when we talk.  But...