August 19, 2019, 02:03:11 am


"Welcome to -- When adult children marry and leave home, life can sometimes get more complex instead of simpler.  Being a mother-in-law or daughter-in-law can be tough.  How do we extend love and support to our mothers-in-law, adult children, daughters-in-law, sons-in-law, and grandchildren without interfering?  What do we do when there are communication problems?  How can we ask for help when we need it without being a burden?  And how do our family members feel about these issues?  We invite you to join our free forum, read some posts... and when you're ready...share your challenges and wisdom."

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Messages - Forum Moderator

Grab Bag / Re: Personal Messages
April 16, 2011, 12:43:58 am
@Laurie - You have my email address, so flirt away!   ;)

@Rose799 - Thanks for your concern re: my mom. Having to put her little Me, Too doggie to sleep was really tough on her, as you all probably know. She has a big heart and deeply bonds. She's strong and will be fine -- it's just a huge adjustment for her.

@Julia - Glad you understand. Yes, those who have each other's emails and want to fight can continue battling in that medium if they like.

@Pen - I'd probably feel the same way. My concern about giving a warning about PMs being disabled was that I didn't want to encourage a flurry of last minute battles.

@All - It's fine if you publicly post your email addresses...and...just know that "spambots" spider many sites (including WWU) to grab email addresses and then add them to their lists.

I'm listening, and as always, so is my mom. My current thought is that I could pick a day next week to turn PMs back on for 24 hours. That way, those of you who have built relationships and want to voluntarily exchange email addresses could do so privately. How does that sound?
Grab Bag / Re: Personal Messages
April 15, 2011, 08:47:01 pm
@jill, I sent the following email out to all members earlier today.

    Dear Members ~~
    I wanted to let you all know that I just fully disabled
the forum's personal messaging (PM) system. With hundreds
of active members and thousands of posts, my mom's (Luise
Volta's) job as Forum Moderator has become substantial.
When member conflicts reach a high level, like they have
lately, she becomes inundated with personal messages and
post moderation duties. Frankly, dealing with all this
drama takes more time and energy than she's willing to
invest. I don't blame her. I trust that removal of the PM
system will help to foster the kind of supportive web
community she envisions. I believe most of you share in
that vision.
    Please remember the policies to which you agreed when
you registered at the forum (sorry for the lack of line
breaks; you may need to scroll to the right to read this):
    I can't tell you how many "thank you" emails forum
members have sent to my mom. It's been truly heartwarming
to read them. There's SUCH an opportunity here at WWU to
learn, grow, and provide mutual support.
    If you want to participate at WWU -- and my mom and I
hope you do -- you must treat each other with respect. You
can respectfully disagree. I know that the majority of you
conduct yourselves in this manner.
    Look...if you find yourself reacting, arguing, taking
sides, or wanting to "be right"...well, you're human like
the rest of us. If you want or need to vent, go for it.
Just don't do so in the forum. Instead, for example, you
can express your thoughts in your private journal or chat
with a trusted friend. Once you feel rebalanced, you're
welcome to come back to WWU and contribute.
    I've been SO impressed by the various post threads my
mom has pointed out to me and look forward to supporting
this forum for years to come.
    Best Wishes,
    ~~ Kirk VandenBerghe
Grab Bag / Re: Birthday Wishes for Luise
March 09, 2011, 07:20:10 pm
Sincere thanks to everyone who participated in my mom's birthday gift.

I was going to wait until her group party on Saturday, but the timing just felt right today. She was surprised and moved by your kindness.

Special appreciation to Laurie for heading up the effort.

Best Wishes,
~~ Kirk
Grab Bag / Re: Love the new site name!
February 16, 2010, 07:20:40 pm
Glad you like the new name. My mom, Luise Volta, came up with it. Much better description, seems to me.