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Daughter in Laws and/or Son in Laws / Re: It never ends , sorry to say
« Last post by lancaster lady on May 22, 2018, 08:26:24 AM »
I'm in my cooling off period at the moment , always wise to do this . Otherwise I would blow a gasket and be cut off . I think that's what she wants .
So by keeping cool it hopefully will annoy her to death .
Sneaky huh ?
Been at this a long time now , doesn't get any easier .
We have known dil for 15 years. I feel that she has no use for us - when they visit she is on her cell constantly or hiding in another room avoiding everyone.
 She met someone whose name is spelled the same  as my hubby's but pronounces it differently, and now, 3 times so far, when we see her, she asks my hubby how he says his name! The first time she said "What is your name? How do you pronounce it?" He explained the family connection.  The second time, she did the same "What is your name?  I keep getting confused".  He is so unruffled but it bothers me no end.  This last visit it happened again.
How can you forget anyone's name, especially your fil's  - someone you've known for years?  We only see them about 3-4 times a year even though they live only an hour away. I questioned son this last time and he says the wrong name just slipped out. i say disrespectful!
I feel it is another way to show how little she thinks of us.  We do a lot for them - gifts, lending money.  We try to show love when we see them.  She doesn't deal with us often - how hard is it to suck it up for a few times a year and be gracious?
Someone at the party must have asked where his parents were.  I wonder, did she make up a story or tell the truth that she didn't invite you? I would let my son know the truth - that you were not invited.I agree about Karma.Or you could bring it up when you see her - say I am so disappointed that we didn't get to be at our son's birthday!  Sad and unnecessary to be cruel like this.     
Daughter in Laws and/or Son in Laws / Re: It never ends , sorry to say
« Last post by lancaster lady on May 21, 2018, 10:51:50 PM »
Thankyou for your kind reply .
However they're still quite young and impressionable , she tends to poison their minds with made up stories . Until they're at the age when they can make up their own minds , we're kinda at her mercy .
Daughter in Laws and/or Son in Laws / Re: It never ends , sorry to say
« Last post by Bamboo2 on May 21, 2018, 09:12:37 PM »
Ouch, Lancaster Lady!  That gotta hurt.  It sounds like what your son wanted and what he got for his birthday were two different things.  The things he must have to put up with...

While you say "she knows" you will always be there for your grandchildren, THEY also know that, and isn't that what matters most?
Daughter in Laws and/or Son in Laws / Re: It never ends , sorry to say
« Last post by luise.volta on May 21, 2018, 03:03:00 PM »
Oh, how difficult for both you and your son! Yes, I do believe 'what goes around, comes around'! It has many names. I kinda' like "Gotcha'! Hugs...
Grab Bag / Re: 91st Birthday
« Last post by luise.volta on May 21, 2018, 02:55:06 PM »
Thank you, my dear, dear friend!
Daughter in Laws and/or Son in Laws / It never ends , sorry to say
« Last post by lancaster lady on May 21, 2018, 02:48:52 PM »
I am an old timer on this site going back a few years , the ladies helped me enormously in my time of need .
Fast forward eight years .....
My DS just had his 40th birthday. . I was assured he wanted no party or fuss and visited him the day before his birthday with best wishes .
On his actual birthday , my DIL planned a dinner with all her family .
My invite never arrived .
My DS knew nothing as it was a surprise ,
I have yet to speak to his wife !
After all these years it still hurts , her secret card is the GC   SHE KNOWS I will always be there for them .
I think this is her best yet .
My wish , KARMA ......
Grab Bag / Re: 91st Birthday
« Last post by lancaster lady on May 21, 2018, 02:34:07 PM »
Dear Luise

Your old friend here , could not let this occasion be missed albeit late .
Wishing you the best of all birthdays .
Hope you are in good health .
Sending love and hugs .
Daughter in Laws and/or Son in Laws / Re: Conflicted
« Last post by Frustrated Oma on May 20, 2018, 02:34:07 PM »
So now I find that my original topic of discussion is even more true."Conflicted"  What I thought was a break through with my DS, we have had many phone conversations and he has opened up to me about issues with his wife.  He even showed up for a family dinner on Mother's day without her and sent me the nicest text message after the dinner telling me how nice it was to spend time with his family without being on edge wondering what might upset her.  I was so relieved that we were finally seeing the old son we knew.  Now I  have sent some text messages and have received no response.  I haven't texted him again in the last few days.  So now I keep reliving a conversation we had when things weren't so good between us when he stated,  "do you realize how easy it is to lie to you".  I just keep concocting this this in my head like this was there next way of getting his wife through Mother's day without having to show up.  I am probably very wrong and my head is just creating things but I guess after all that had been said during our time of fighting, I am having a hard time trusting.  Is that wrong?  As I said, Conflicted!
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