Sorry for the late response to your much needed supported and wise words. Green Thumb, your words have helped me enormously. I am trying very hard not to harbor resentment for her actions. I don't know if she truly understands what she's doing. She already has a daughter that has absolutely no contact with her paternal family because the father has denied her from day one. She's young now and maybe not as affected by it as she grows older. I hope that she'll remain happy and well adjusted despite her father's rejection. But it is clear that she wants a dad because in the short time that my son and her mother were together she called him dad.
I think of him often throughout the day and I am keeping a little diary about my feelings. It helps a lot. My son took off work last Friday and went over in an attempt to see his son. He was not even allowed to see him and told that in order to do so "there are rules". I asked him what they were but he said he didn't know and didn't care. We haven't talked about it since. I told him that he didn't have to abide by her rules that there were family courts and he has parental rights. He brushed it off and we haven't discussed the baby since. He doesn't like to talk about it.
Son has another 2 other daughters from a previous relationship. One biological, one a daughter of the heart since the day she was born. They spend every weekend with us . They are three and four and ADORABLE!!! We also have another 3 year old granddaughter from oldest son and she often comes by to visit on the weekend as well. So we had no end of happy distractions. However, he presence is still sorely missed.
Hi Pen! Thanks for the welcome! It's nice to be able to come here and feel like you've come home to friends. This website helped me to continue to function and taught me to cope when I was having issues with oldest DS. He's in the living room right now with our granddaughter. I'm off today and watching her when he goes to work later. I am hopeful that time will help this situation as well.
Thanks Wise Women...I truly appreciate you.