October 31, 2020, 08:26:04 am


"Welcome to WiseWomenUnite.com -- When adult children marry and leave home, life can sometimes get more complex instead of simpler.  Being a mother-in-law or daughter-in-law can be tough.  How do we extend love and support to our mothers-in-law, adult children, daughters-in-law, sons-in-law, and grandchildren without interfering?  What do we do when there are communication problems?  How can we ask for help when we need it without being a burden?  And how do our family members feel about these issues?  We invite you to join our free forum, read some posts... and when you're ready...share your challenges and wisdom."

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Messages - my2girls

My 22 year old DD, her 24 year old fiance and 3 year old GD all live with my self, DH and youngest DD who is 19.  My 22yr old DD does not speak to us, she will answer some questions with one word but rarely anything more especially with me. I have tried to speak to her, ask her if something was wrong or if she was upset about something , nope she says. Awhile ago maybe 4-5 months ago she did tell me and my husband that we treat our youngest daughter so much differently than we treat her. I really dont think that we do but our youngest daughter and us get along very well and have a great relationship. I dont know what to do anymore, I try to speak with her, ask her if she wants to go bumming around at stores or out to lunch, her response is usually she is busy and never will mention it again. I asked her today if I made an appointment to go to speak with someone if she would come with  , she said no I would not!  DD does alot of activities with her fiancecs family sometimes multiple times per week but she is always to busy to join us to do anything. Both my DD and her fiance work partime and are in their last year of school fulltime. We have kicked them out before because of how disrespectful she was to us. They all came back last year and things were good for the most part but now she just doesnt talk to us! Her Fiance and my GD come ome or she gets a phone call and she is the happiest laughing person you ever met, I dont get it and it is stressing me out!!!!!
My daughter now 21, had her daughter, my grandchild 2 years ago. When she got pregnant her boyfriend/father of granddaughter moved in also. Things were ok for a few months but all they did was fight and argue, heard a lot of bad arguments that made it difficult to like the father. About 6 months into living with us he was being very mean and saying horrible things to my daughter while they were arguing he came down stairs and got into my husbands face arguing with him, did not end well and husband and daughters boyfriend got into a physical fight. Big problems, cops and his family involved came to our home trying to fight the remainder of our household. My daughter, granddaughter and her boyfriend/father moved in with his family for about 10 months until he got into an argument with his family and they kicked them out. They moved back in with us(myself, husband and 17yo daughter) things were ok for a short time but then thing became tense, daughters boyfriend did not do anything other than college and work 4 hrs every early AM 4 days per week. Well between out older daughters attitude at everyone in the home except her boyfriend and daughter and her boyfriend not helping with anything around the home things blew up with an argument, my husband kicked them out because he was not going to let it get to bad in our home after the fight that had happened prior. well it has been 5 weeks now, the boyfriend will not come around I had asked my daughter to have them all come over last weekend to visit a little bit and have dinner. My daughter said no because her boyfriend was still mad about what happened and she was busy but we could take our granddaughter for a bit, so of coarse we did. My daughter does not respond to most of our texts and rarely will answer her phone when we call. We asked her earlier this week to come with her dad, sister and I Friday night to do an art class, she declined as she stated she was busy. She is so very distant and I am feeling crazy. I am glad they left as my house was so stressful due to her attitude and how she treated us but he is my daughter and we want to be a part of her life. Our daughters used to be close, literally they don't speak my younger one is so angry with her and how she treats us, I just don't know what to do anymore. I see my granddaughter 2x per week to watch her while my daughter is at class, this past week her father was off for the week so I have not seen or spoken to her at all. Please any advise would be helpful....