I read something here on WWU once where a mom mentioned putting the hurtful relationship with her adult child "on the shelf", acknowledging that right now a break is helpful but might not be permanent. She still wished the best for her AC, but didn't want to participate in a relationship that was not healthy. For me, that seemed like a way to think about that difficult time in our relationship and how to not let it overwhelm me. If our relationship is put on the shelf, then it can be taken off when there is mutual respect and a willingness to have an adult-to-adult relationship. In the meantime, there is a freedom to focus on creating my own joy and healthy relationships. That has really helped me to remember that what's happening now may not last forever and that I do have choices about who I engage with on a daily basis.
Wishing you better days ahead. (((Hugs)))