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"Welcome to -- When adult children marry and leave home, life can sometimes get more complex instead of simpler.  Being a mother-in-law or daughter-in-law can be tough.  How do we extend love and support to our mothers-in-law, adult children, daughters-in-law, sons-in-law, and grandchildren without interfering?  What do we do when there are communication problems?  How can we ask for help when we need it without being a burden?  And how do our family members feel about these issues?  We invite you to join our free forum, read some posts... and when you're ready...share your challenges and wisdom."

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Topics - LoveMyGrandkids

Grandchildren / Different situation
September 08, 2012, 02:07:15 pm
Hi all.  New member here, so please bear with any mistakes.  My situation is a little different in that my DS is the at home parent while my DIL is the one who works.  I help my DS take care of my GK toddlers a couple times a week.  I get the feeling, although nobody will tell me directly, that my DIL is jealous of my closeness with the GKs.  They prefer me to her parents, this was quite obvious on one occasion.  I am trying to avoid another situation where that will happen.  I don't want their other grandma to feel hurt.  Anyway I get this feeling of her being jealous because she is often critical, and when my GD finally gave me my much desired grandma name, my DIL immediately hated it and requested I change how I spell it.  Is MomMaw a grandma name that crosses a boundary?  I thought it was quite common to spell it that way, and I had been encouraging the children to call me Grandma.  MomMaw is what i got, and I love it.  I agreed after some thought to change the spelling, but I am feeling frustrated, hurt and am wondering what comes next.  There have been several other things too, where I feel vaguely that she wishes I would just go away.  Those kids adore me and I adore them.  Since when is that a bad thing?