May 21, 2019, 02:55:42 pm

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"Welcome to WiseWomenUnite.com -- When adult children marry and leave home, life can sometimes get more complex instead of simpler.  Being a mother-in-law or daughter-in-law can be tough.  How do we extend love and support to our mothers-in-law, adult children, daughters-in-law, sons-in-law, and grandchildren without interfering?  What do we do when there are communication problems?  How can we ask for help when we need it without being a burden?  And how do our family members feel about these issues?  We invite you to join our free forum, read some posts... and when you're ready...share your challenges and wisdom."


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Topics - OhGal

1
Hello -- I am new here (thank you Jazz!)....My DS married his high school sweetheart 6 years ago.  Last September, they had twins. Everything was fine with my son until I suspect his wife got sick of him calling me to ask my advice about silly things like....how long to cook a roast, etc.  One day, all calls and communication like that just...stopped. When I asked my son about it,he told me that he had to make a choice.  It wasn't me.  Well, I didn't really expect it to be me, but I also didn't expect that I would someday have the DIL from hell, who would make her husband make such a choice.

I have NEVER (to the best of my knowledge) done anything to make this girl feel bad -- in fact, I feel like I've always gone out of my way to make her feel special.

She has got this bizarre relationship with her mom.   It's all about her and her mom (even the wedding pictures -- her and her mom, getting ready for the day. None of, or with, me).  Her mom is included in everything -- including company picnics -- and my husband and my son work at the same place.  I've tried asked her if I've done something wrong; she is the supreme example of passive aggressiveness.  "No..nothing is wrong!!! How could you think that??"  Well, ok then...

Anyway, we are no longer allowed to watch the kids because a few months ago, while my husband was holding the baby girl, he stumbled and tripped over their dog - he couldn't see the dog over the baby.  The baby wasn't hurt at all -- my husband protected her against his body. If anything, my husband was significantly injured, by taking the brunt of the fall on his elbows.  The poor guy was in tears that it happened in the first place. I told them what happened, because if anything were to happen to the baby girl in the future (like 24-48 hours, etc.), I wanted them to know.  Many people have since told me I ws stupid for saying anything...but if I didn't, and something happened to her, I would never forgive myself for not saying anything.

We live 15 minutes from them; we've seen the babies about 4 times; they're 11 months old.  But my DIL's family is there constantly. They also live 15 minutes away.

In their house, she has the rooms filled with pictures of her family.  None of us.  None.

Her mother unfriended me on Facebook. I don't know why, except maybe she didn't want me to see all the time she was spending over there.

It's just not fair. My only consolation is now she has a son. One day he'll be married. I hope her DIL is just as bad as she is. Unfortunately, I'll be dead before I can see any of this unfold.

Thank you for letting me vent.  I hope I can be a sounding block for you, as well!

Ohio_Gal