March 28, 2024, 05:03:40 PM

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"Welcome to WiseWomenUnite.com -- When adult children marry and leave home, life can sometimes get more complex instead of simpler.  Being a mother-in-law or daughter-in-law can be tough.  How do we extend love and support to our mothers-in-law, adult children, daughters-in-law, sons-in-law, and grandchildren without interfering?  What do we do when there are communication problems?  How can we ask for help when we need it without being a burden?  And how do our family members feel about these issues?  We invite you to join our free forum, read some posts... and when you're ready...share your challenges and wisdom."


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Messages - Chris6753

1
Thanks for your notes, you made me feel better.

But I did a mistake by visiting when they were 18 months old. (Never ask to help not once) Her mother told
me I wish I could go home. I did not think and said "Why don't you" I knew I made a mistake and quickly said
I am sorry. She told her daughter, now I don't hear the end of it.

I feel so sorry for my son also complaining about putting out fires. But I hate to say it but it my DIL making the
fires and not letting it go.

I thank you for writing me.
2
Yesterday I found out my foster Mother has past away. Where she went to church they are having a memorial service. The reason I am writing is my son and wife lives close so we wanted to see grandchildren. The saddest part of this my son had to make sure this was ok by wife. REALLY??? We are not asking to stay with them, we just want to see the kids. This hurt so much. Her mother any day any time, but us by appointment only. Believe me appointment is ok, but this is nasty in the first degree. We had sent birthday cards, Christmas cards, and money to the kids. She treats us terribly, really thinking of sending her the laws of grandparents rights.
>:(
3
Don't worry I didn't say a word to DIL or her parents. I just feel sorry for my son.
I learn later not to say anything and just have the hurt will never get involve anymore.
We are the forgotten ones.
4
I can't believe the nerve of my Daughter in law, she stay behind with the Triplets in Florida with her parent after thanksgiving trip to Disney World and stayed still after Christmas. My son had to go home because he works. So he spend his Christmas alone without his family. I never did that to my husband or family. He wrote late on Christmas email that on 12/27/15 that the triplets will be opening up gifts. Come on people she still there and lied about coming home sooner. Guess what she is bring her Mom, I just hope she does not stay another 3 years. My thoughts is that my Daughter in law is awful for not coming home before Christmas so my son could enjoy his children also.
5
Adult Sons and/or Adult Daughters / Abandon by son
December 10, 2015, 11:51:36 AM
It hurts so much to be abandon by your own son. It always my daughter in law family always. secretly getting married
but her family knew and was there for that marriage. (We told him not to do something stupid like get married) but he
did. He wrote a notebook with lies about us and left it out for her parents to read. Finally after 11 years of married
in our books (really 15 years) they had Triplets. We talk and said that Mom be glad to help after babies were born, just
ask. Was she asked?? NO, which hurt and I was supposed to support her mother who stay with them over 3 years. Well
waiting gave up. So we went to see them and had to make appointments to see the Triplets, which hurt more because her
Mom was allow to see them no matter what. First to be in family Christmas pictures (which we call the (maiden name)
picture) Left out again. Hurt again. All holiday pictures taken with her family just so hurtful and we can't say anything.
We kept our mouth shut and feel the pain everytime. Now the big one, since the Triplets were born we been saving going
without. Planning and finally getting in the deal to go with them to Disney World, letting us months before so my husband
could get the time off. November they took off and went to Disney World with her parent without invisiting us. The pain
was the last one we can take. Never wrote them back because of the emptiness we feel. We know the Triplets were not at
fault for this and sent gift cards only for Christmas.
We are maintaning our silence now, we know.
Just so hurt and abandon by your own son, that you know you did better in teaching him right from wrong. Go with the
flow and forgets us altogether.