WiseWomenUnite.com

General Category => Grab Bag => Topic started by: luise.volta on April 18, 2011, 01:05:27 pm

Title: I'm Back
Post by: luise.volta on April 18, 2011, 01:05:27 pm

Dear WWUers,

The level of vulnerability I have recently experienced temporarily made the situation at WWU too difficult for me to cope with. I'm now ready to take the reins back from Kirk who graciously offered to intervene but needs to get back to work. I thank him for his affection for all of us. Are we lucky, or what?

I have sent literally hundreds of WWU Kudos to Kirk over the last two years from women who have found a safe haven here; a place to learn, understand, heal and move on by sharing with others who care. Those women didn't turn their lives around because I am a Pollyanna. They didn't heal and thrive because I want everyone to "make nice" and lock any thread that suggests otherwise.

I stepped into deep waters when I welcomed daughters in law here and I disagree with those of you who have advised me that you feel they should be sent on their way. Their way is my way and I feel the reason we have seen so many dramatic recoveries here is because we have dared to discount MIL and DIL generalizations and have chosen, instead, to look at both sides of the coin. Most but not all of us have come to the realization that it's not the title, it's the person. So, no, I'm not going back to www.MothersInLawUnite.com. The operative word being "back." We're moving forward.

Regarding the Personal Message option, more people than you could imagine have inadvertently sent me PMs meant for others. It's not in the software, it's a user error. So I am all too familiar with how it can be used to roast others and me. It is also used to incite. Why would I support that? Our forum is composed of our threads and postings. I think what's fair is to ask Kirk to open it up for the rest of the month to let you make whatever arrangements you want to. So, I will do that.

Those of you who don't like me, my methods or my Forum are free to leave. What are you doing here in the first place? If you can't state your position, no matter how intense, respectfully and without being judgmental...you are not welcome here.

Those of you who feel WWU is a fit, please stay. Thank you for standing tall through all of this. You have been very effective and are cherished, valued members in high standing.

Sending love...

Luise
Title: Re: I'm Back
Post by: Nana on April 18, 2011, 01:11:55 pm
Yes Captain....my Captain

Understood and acknowledged.

Thanks

Love you Luise....
Title: Re: I'm Back
Post by: seasage on April 18, 2011, 01:12:31 pm
Welcome back, Luise.  I hope you will be able to continue this useful forum without too much personal stress.  Let us know how we can help.

Title: Re: I'm Back
Post by: SunnyDays09 on April 18, 2011, 01:24:12 pm
  Happy Days are here again!!  Couldn't resist.  This is where you belong, Luise.  Please thank your son for doing what he does so well.

   (I have no idea what happened but it's better that way) 
Title: Re: I'm Back
Post by: holliberri on April 18, 2011, 01:41:17 pm
Good to have you back, Luise. I echo Seasage's sentiments.
Title: Re: I'm Back
Post by: pam1 on April 18, 2011, 01:56:15 pm
So glad to see you back :) 
Title: Re: I'm Back
Post by: lancaster lady on April 18, 2011, 02:44:19 pm
Sometimes good things fall apart , so better things can fall together ..... :)

Welcome back Luise , hope I am welcome on your Forum , you have my utmost respect always .... :)
Title: Re: I'm Back
Post by: Forum Moderator on April 18, 2011, 02:58:46 pm
Well said, Mom. I don't imagine many women (or men) in their mid eighties are moderating busy forums. I'm proud of you.

And I'm proud of the majority of the WWU members who are creating such a safe space for personal growth and healing.

Regarding in-laws, I find it so heartbreaking when families break apart from "being right," miscommunication, and strife, and so heartwarming when they have the courage to learn, grow, and reunite.
Title: Re: I'm Back
Post by: cadagi101 on April 18, 2011, 03:00:27 pm
thankyou so much, lets get on with it!! yeahh
Title: Re: I'm Back
Post by: BrokenHope on April 18, 2011, 03:14:25 pm
Whew!!!!!!!!! Thank Goodness.
When I came across this site I thought I had died and gone to heaven and found angles who understood my pain.

This is what the WWU and Luise mean to me


The true friends who we meet online
are a very special kind. They pierce your shields and see within the corners of your mind.
They're always there when you're in need with their power to discern. They feel your pain.........they offer hope and genuine concern.
We bare our souls, expose our hearts and show our inner fears, and then before you know it the keyboard's stained with tears.
And if we could see them through that screen then no one could deny that to be a TRUE online friend they too must surely cry.
Life's events don't always happen, Just as they are planned. some are really trying times, WW fully understand. Moments like the present, past and future Tend to upset and confuse, WW try to give you their support, In any path we choose. They`ll listen always with their hearts, They`ll do what they can do, They`ll hope for brighter things to come. Their thoughts remain with all of us.
They know about our situations. Yet they have their own life's demands; But they never want you to forget they are here and are the one`s who understand!
Although my pain is deep and hard for me to share and I have only been here for a short time, you all have helped me continue on my healing path.
I am proud to call myself a WWU family member.
Thank you for Coming back Luise and thank you for being my angel
Title: Re: I'm Back
Post by: BrokenHope on April 18, 2011, 03:21:57 pm
One more thing..


It`s lifes thorns that make the roses all worth while. :)
Title: Re: I'm Back
Post by: Nana on April 18, 2011, 03:36:07 pm
I like the spirit everyone has today....go ww....go.

Title: Re: I'm Back
Post by: Pen on April 18, 2011, 04:59:15 pm
Luise and Kirk, thank you again for this incredible site. I was devastated at first when I thought there was a good chance you'd close it, but I soon realized I'd learned so much here that I could probably manage, sadly, without it. I'm glad I don't have to test my bravado right now! But it's a testament to the growth that is possible here if we support one another's progress.
Title: Re: I'm Back
Post by: Rose799 on April 18, 2011, 06:05:38 pm
Very sweet, BH...  It's so nice to have you back, Luise! 
Title: Re: I'm Back
Post by: BrokenHope on April 18, 2011, 06:15:45 pm
 ;D Thats My story and how I feel about this place and I`m sticking to it.... ;D
Title: Re: I'm Back
Post by: jill on April 18, 2011, 06:16:08 pm
So good to have you back Luise, and you have a wonderful son who was there to support you through the last few days..................Jill
Title: Re: I'm Back
Post by: Kennedy on April 18, 2011, 06:29:24 pm
Quote from: Forum Moderator on April 18, 2011, 02:58:46 pm
Well said, Mom. I don't imagine many women (or men) in their mid eighties are moderating busy forums. I'm proud of you.

And I'm proud of the majority of the WWU members who are creating such a safe space for personal growth and healing.

Regarding in-laws, I find it so heartbreaking when families break apart from "being right," miscommunication, and strife, and so heartwarming when they have the courage to learn, grow, and reunite.

Hi Luise and Kirk, I'm a fairly new member and I haven't posted much yet.  I'm not very out spoken.
From a new comers point of view, This forum is a heaven sent. So thank you to you both for all your hard work!
It  has already helped me to see differently than I used to on some things.
I believe as Women we can hold each other up in Prayer and Friendship even if we don't agree on a subject.

There is some Amazing women here!!
With all that I am, I really believe we all want our families together,happy and healthy. That is why in my opinion forum like this are here.
I pray for Gods love and happiness for us all!

Title: Re: I'm Back
Post by: Tara on April 18, 2011, 08:50:20 pm
Luise,

I'm glad you are back and appreciate the stance you are taking about the forum, it just makes so much sense.
And maybe also, the kind of communication you are requiring even when there is disagreement will be a model for
us in our families who don't always agree either.

Kirk,  Thanks for all you have done and your kindness and compassion.

Kennedy, I was touched by what you said:  "I believe as Women we can hold each other up in Prayer and Friendship even if we don't agree on a subject."
Title: Re: I'm Back
Post by: courtney on April 19, 2011, 12:05:40 am
Yes, well said Luise! Welcome back!  :)  ...and

Yes! Well said Kirk! Where would we be without you, and the love and care you have for your Mom!??

Thank you both so much for everything, and now, for pulling us all thru this with dignity,
... and resolve that the foundation of this site IS sound, and does change lives.

The comments and advice to my own situation, and so many other stories & feedback I read, gave me an insight I couldn't have gotten in Years on my own!
Yes, I did the legwork, but with courage knowing I could come back here for encouragement. Because I am not alone in my grief anymore.
I do not feel ashamed anymore, or guilty anymore.
I know I did my best for her.
I don't cry every day anymore.
I don't look for logic anymore either, about the 'why' of it.
I try to remember there are others besides me, who need me to be ok.

This site absolutely changed my outlook on so many different subjects, & my perception of other people's actions, that they weren't necessarily 'against me',  just living their own lives!

I have recommended this site many times now...because it works!
Thank you again, Luise & Kirk...and all you wonderful ladies who share here!!!
Thank you for a life that is so much better than before I found you.
-Courtney
Title: Re: I'm Back
Post by: cadagi101 on April 19, 2011, 12:17:01 am
Quote from: courtney on April 19, 2011, 12:05:40 am
Yes, well said Luise! Welcome back!  :)  ...and

Yes! Well said Kirk! Where would we be without you, and the love and care you have for your Mom!??

Thank you both so much for everything, and now, for pulling us all thru this with dignity,
... and resolve that the foundation of this site IS sound, and does change lives.

The comments and advice to my own situation, and so many other stories & feedback I read, gave me an insight I couldn't have gotten in Years on my own!
Yes, I did the legwork, but with courage knowing I could come back here for encouragement. Because I am not alone in my grief anymore.


I do not feel ashamed anymore, or guilty anymore.
I know I did my best for her.
I don't cry every day anymore.
I don't look for logic anymore either, about the 'why' of it.
I try to remember there are others besides me, who need me to be ok.

This site absolutely changed my outlook on so many different subjects, & my perception of other people's actions, that they weren't necessarily 'against me',  just living their own lives!

I have recommended this site many times now...because it works!
Thank you again, Luise & Kirk...and all you wonderful ladies who share here!!!
Thank you for a life that is so much better than before I found you.
-Courtney


Courtney you said it all, very nicely put.
Title: Re: I'm Back
Post by: courtney on April 19, 2011, 01:02:11 am
Thanks Julia. I'm sure you are one of those wonderful ladies!  :)