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"Welcome to WiseWomenUnite.com -- When adult children marry and leave home, life can sometimes get more complex instead of simpler.  Being a mother-in-law or daughter-in-law can be tough.  How do we extend love and support to our mothers-in-law, adult children, daughters-in-law, sons-in-law, and grandchildren without interfering?  What do we do when there are communication problems?  How can we ask for help when we need it without being a burden?  And how do our family members feel about these issues?  We invite you to join our free forum, read some posts... and when you're ready...share your challenges and wisdom."

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Messages - dazedandconfused

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Adult Sons and/or Adult Daughters / Re: afraid i crossed the line
February 06, 2018, 08:43:08 AM
I'm really sorry for your hurt feelings, G.  I remember my mom expressing similar feelings to me - I was in my late 20's/early 30's, working full time, a mom of two and a wife to a great guy who had to travel a lot for work.  I was spread so thin!  My mother's habit at that time was to aggressively attack when she had an emotional need - during one call in particular, she said some very hurtful things to me ("you treat us like garbage!" and "we could be dead for days and you'd never know!").  Looking past the anger, I saw someone needing some time and/or attention from me.  I took some time, dried my tears and I asked if we could have a standing lunch date every (I think it was Thursday) so that we had some time to spend together.  It seemed to really help her - and we had some memorable times.  I don't know the logistics of your situation, but maybe a standing phone call or something would work for you both?  I am a believer in finding solutions, so I thought I'd offer something that was really useful for me.

Good luck!!
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