I moped around yesterday because a couple days ago I got a big hit emotionally from my Dad's email (the never ending saga of not being the favorite daughter) and I let him get to me. I started feeling pretty unimportant (and jealous of my sister) and mad. Why do I still want my Dad's approval? It is really like beating my head against a wall. I figure I have this basic insecure feeling to work on all my life. What will I do? I am going to see the GK this Friday and I am carrying around this baggage of not feeling good enough when what I want is to be strong for them, build their self-esteem and love them up. It gets pretty freaking boring to be focused on ME ME ME all the time. Maybe that is what happens, as a consequence of not having your parents' attention - you feel like you need a lot of attention to make you feel important? I know the answer is inside me - to give myself the attention I need so I can give attention to my GK. So today, what I will do next, is focus my attention on doing something good for myself, build up my own self-esteem and get ready for this trip. Gag! Do we ever grow up and not need others' approval?
We all ride that wave at times. Thank heaven we no longer have to do it alone. Sending love...
:'(Thank you, really glad I am not alone today. ONWARD! Soldier on, hugs and :-*
Perfectly normal Smiles! I would worry about you if you didn't want a good relationship and attention from your Dad. Remember our mantra, "It is what it is and will be until it isn't." It may seem it's about you, but it's about him. The only part that is about you is how you choose to react. You know he is this way and there is no changing him unless he decides to. So say, "Phooey! He is so missing out on me!"
You are wonderful and it is his loss! Now, smile.........smile again.......and get ready to go see those GKs!
Love you Pooh ... :-*
Smiles, I have a similar dad issue. I agree with Pooh, his loss. But I know how hard it is to not let years of poor treatment zing you. {{{hugs}}}
I got instant :'( warm tears from your compassion, Pooh and Pen
It is more about him -- and what he is missing -- too bad for him, his loss! just a bit of a zing, like chewing on aluminum foil on my fillings -- zing! Yowzah! :) THANK YOU!
"It is what it is and will be until it isn't."
"It is what it is and will be until it isn't."
"It is what it is and will be until it isn't."
"It is what it is and will be until it isn't."
"It is what it is and will be until it isn't."
"It is what it is and will be until it isn't."
:(