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How to handle without hurting someone I care about so much.

Started by SassyDI, May 30, 2011, 05:28:06 PM

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SassyDI

Well I spoke to her yesterday I was honest and told her how I was feeling.  She listened and said she didn't see what I was talking about and that her sister has a lot on her plate.  That her sister has never said anything about not liking me.  She said it hurt her to hear it because she loves her sister so much but she knows I am not doing it to be mean.  We talked some more and hung up as I had to get DD to bed and she had to go get her son up from his evening nap.  Today or tomorrow taking DD over to the park i wanted pics at because I found out you have to pay a fee if professional is using the park now that I wanted to use.  Hoping DD is good.(bribing her with ice cream)

Pooh

You needed to do that even if BFF doesn't see it the same way.  I would be willing to bet she is just so used to how her sister is, she doesn't see it.  It's good that she said that she knew you were not trying to be mean.

Ice cream would work for me!
We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us. -
Joseph Campbell

holliberri


AnonymousDIL

Sounds like it went well. Keeping my fingers crossed that your BFF will keep her relationship with you and her relationship with her sister separate.  :)

I honestly don't know how I would handle the "I like you, but not your sibling" convo. DB is kinda pulling that line with my DH. "Your okay, but DH isn't".... Bleh!

SassyDI

Quote from: AnonymousDIL on June 01, 2011, 06:04:03 AM
Sounds like it went well. Keeping my fingers crossed that your BFF will keep her relationship with you and her relationship with her sister separate.  :)

I honestly don't know how I would handle the "I like you, but not your sibling" convo. DB is kinda pulling that line with my DH. "Your okay, but DH isn't".... Bleh!

But I don't dislike her sister at all.  I don't like the way she is treating me there is a big difference.   I think her sister dislikes me.  I  never told her she can't hang out with us. 

AnonymousDIL

Quote from: SassyDI on June 01, 2011, 06:07:38 AM
But I don't dislike her sister at all.  I don't like the way she is treating me there is a big difference.   I think her sister dislikes me.  I  never told her she can't hang out with us.

Color me confused.... Soooooooo, what exactly are you hoping for here? I'm really finding it difficult to understand. Do you want BFF to tell sis, "Hey, be nicer to Sassy?" I'm so confused. It sounded like you don't want to hang out with BFF's Sis because she is unkind to you, but you still want to hang out with BFF.

There is nothing you or BFF or anyone can do to make BFF Sis nicer to you.

This is the impression that I have gotten from all of this. Even though this isn't what you said, this may be what BFF heard or what gets translated to/heard by BFF Sis. "Sassy thinks you don't like her because you are being rude to her. She wants you to stop." BFF Sis might retaliate to that and it could end bad, even though your intentions are pure.

SassyDI


AnonymousDIL

Blood is thicker than water. You could lose a good friend.

SassyDI

Quote from: AnonymousDIL on June 01, 2011, 10:07:40 AM
Blood is thicker than water. You could lose a good friend.
Then she was never a true friend.

SassyDI

We have been though a lot in 11 years.  I have no ill will towards her sister so I really don't truley see sour crienship ending..