WiseWomenUnite.com

Problem Solving => Daughter in Laws and/or Son in Laws => Topic started by: renny97 on February 04, 2010, 07:10:51 PM

Poll
Question: Anyone able to have contact with s/d and not deal with DIL/SIL?
Option 1: Yes, but with difficulty. votes: 2
Option 2: Yes, and works well. votes: 3
Option 3: No, s/d rarely visits. votes: 2
Option 4: I wish. votes: 1
Option 5: No, no contact at all. votes: 0
Title: Contact with Son or Daughter away from DIL or SIL
Post by: renny97 on February 04, 2010, 07:10:51 PM
Just curious to see if it is possible to have contact with your s/d and stay away from h/is/er inlaws?

Title: Re: Contact with Son or Daughter away from DIL or SIL
Post by: 2chickiebaby on February 04, 2010, 07:12:46 PM
you can have contact, always with your Daughter.  Not your son
Title: Re: Contact with Son or Daughter away from DIL or SIL
Post by: Marilyn on February 04, 2010, 07:30:17 PM
I do,but it isn't very often,and the Grandkids are always with us.Actually only one time,now that i think about it.
Title: Re: Contact with Son or Daughter away from DIL or SIL
Post by: Marilyn on February 04, 2010, 07:31:49 PM
How long has this been going on for you Renny?
Title: Re: Contact with Son or Daughter away from DIL or SIL
Post by: cocobars on February 04, 2010, 07:46:05 PM
Quote from: 2chickiebaby on February 04, 2010, 07:12:46 PM
you can have contact, always with your Daughter.  Not your son
You are too sweet for that thought!  Your DS and DIL's mistake, not yours!  You helped build this site and are the whole reason we are all together!  Don't you forget what a wonderful person you are Chickie!  We love you! :'(
Title: Re: Contact with Son or Daughter away from DIL or SIL
Post by: 2chickiebaby on February 04, 2010, 07:48:15 PM
Thank you, Darlin....you are so sweet to say that.  I appreciate it.  I feel the same about you!! :)
Title: Re: Contact with Son or Daughter away from DIL or SIL
Post by: cocobars on February 04, 2010, 07:52:00 PM
We are all in very depressing situations.  I'm happy you started this site Chickie.  Where would we be without you and Luise!

Wait a minute!  Don't you flush!  Ahh Sayed.... :D


Title: Re: Contact with Son or Daughter away from DIL or SIL
Post by: 2chickiebaby on February 04, 2010, 08:00:21 PM
Okay, no flushing!?
Title: Re: Contact with Son or Daughter away from DIL or SIL
Post by: cocobars on February 04, 2010, 08:03:37 PM
I just wish I could get ahold of that son of yours and just talk to him.  Just for a moment...

Chickie, you still have that sense of humor you've talked about, do you know that?  Do you even know how many times I've read something you've written here and all but hit the floor laughing?  What missed moments those are for your son...  I think he'll come around.  I could be wrong, but I know I've seen how this has affected you!  I know you don't deserve to hurt so badly...

Love doesn't mean pain.  Love means hope - and your children should be ashamed to erase the wonderful light you have!  The sense of humor I've seen peeking through!  It's still there though, and I hope you get it back for good!
Title: Re: Contact with Son or Daughter away from DIL or SIL
Post by: Pen on February 04, 2010, 11:19:45 PM
DH spent one afternoon with DS. DD and I spent an hour with DS. DS came to visit one morning while DIL was away, but had to go back early when she needed something. That's been it in 2 1/2 years. I miss him.
Title: Re: Contact with Son or Daughter away from DIL or SIL
Post by: cremebrulee on February 05, 2010, 04:07:29 AM
Quote from: cocobars on February 04, 2010, 07:46:05 PM
Quote from: 2chickiebaby on February 04, 2010, 07:12:46 PM
you can have contact, always with your Daughter.  Not your son
You are too sweet for that thought!  Your DS and DIL's mistake, not yours!  You helped build this site and are the whole reason we are all together!  Don't you forget what a wonderful person you are Chickie!  We love you! :'(

Ditto on that one....!!!!  Heres a hug and a smile for ya Chickie... ;D
Title: Re: Contact with Son or Daughter away from DIL or SIL
Post by: cremebrulee on February 05, 2010, 04:09:06 AM
yes, I have contact again with my son...for almost a year now, and it's nice to hear from him....but have not seen GD in a really long time, except on Webcast at Christmas, cuz my son was home and they called me....evil DIL walked across the back where they were talking, just to let me know, I hate you and I'm not coming over to say hello, or Merry Christmas.

Title: Re: Contact with Son or Daughter away from DIL or SIL
Post by: Barbie on February 05, 2010, 04:23:42 PM
My son calls me everyday although dil didn't allow us to see eachother for 6 mos. It's always nice to hear his voice but I miss him.
Title: Re: Contact with Son or Daughter away from DIL or SIL
Post by: cocobars on February 05, 2010, 04:52:34 PM
Quote from: guest1 on February 05, 2010, 04:23:42 PM
My son calls me everyday although dil didn't allow us to see eachother for 6 mos. It's always nice to hear his voice but I miss him.
Guest1, he "calls you everyday."  This may mean he still loves you very much and misses you too!  He is obviously keeping you in his heart in spite of what DIL is saying or doing.  This may be good! :)

I'm crossing my fingers!  You hang in!
Title: Re: Contact with Son or Daughter away from DIL or SIL
Post by: Barbie on February 05, 2010, 05:33:13 PM
Oh Coco, I have three children and they are so wonderful and loving. I know my son still loves me and wants to have us in his life but he's also very much in love and will do anything not to rock the boat.
I haven't posted much because I really don't feel there's much more that I can add to all the expert advise given here, I have learned so much from all of you, I was desperate when I came to this site and in just a couple of months I have a much more positive attitude and so much more acceptance of my situation.
This woman has turned our lives upside down for the past 4 years.  All my life I'd heard horror stories about MIL/DIL but never thought it would happen to me. We are a decent family and I felt confident that anyone would be happy and proud to be a part of us but because she has such low self steem I guess she has never felt comfortable around us. I sure hope there's a happy ending but  sincerely doubt it but as long as we can learn to be civil to eachother and she allows us to see our GD whenever possible I'll be happy.
Thanks for your support and understanding.
Title: Re: Contact with Son or Daughter away from DIL or SIL
Post by: cocobars on February 05, 2010, 08:18:06 PM
Quote from: guest1 on February 05, 2010, 05:33:13 PM
Oh Coco, I have three children and they are so wonderful and loving. I know my son still loves me and wants to have us in his life but he's also very much in love and will do anything not to rock the boat.
I haven't posted much because I really don't feel there's much more that I can add to all the expert advise given here, I have learned so much from all of you, I was desperate when I came to this site and in just a couple of months I have a much more positive attitude and so much more acceptance of my situation.
This woman has turned our lives upside down for the past 4 years.  All my life I'd heard horror stories about MIL/DIL but never thought it would happen to me. We are a decent family and I felt confident that anyone would be happy and proud to be a part of us but because she has such low self steem I guess she has never felt comfortable around us. I sure hope there's a happy ending but  sincerely doubt it but as long as we can learn to be civil to eachother and she allows us to see our GD whenever possible I'll be happy.
Thanks for your support and understanding.

Guest1, don't stay in the background.  Post away.  We all understand you here and we are not really experts either.  Your advice is as good as mine in this forum.  Luise and Chickie started this wonderful site just for women like us who need and want support and understanding.  We also have DIL's who come through that give everyone another side to consider.  Nobody here is accusatory.

You know, you may have something to say that is exactly what someone else really needs to hear!  You can't stay in the background when you have such wonderful ideas in your own head.  Don't sit back and feel so desperate and alone in the background.  Believe me, when you do post here, you will find so many warm and caring people. 

I hope you will come back through and tell us more about you!  We are all here for the same thing...  Understanding and love, and you have as much of that in you as any of us! :)