March 28, 2024, 03:41:37 AM

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"Welcome to WiseWomenUnite.com -- When adult children marry and leave home, life can sometimes get more complex instead of simpler.  Being a mother-in-law or daughter-in-law can be tough.  How do we extend love and support to our mothers-in-law, adult children, daughters-in-law, sons-in-law, and grandchildren without interfering?  What do we do when there are communication problems?  How can we ask for help when we need it without being a burden?  And how do our family members feel about these issues?  We invite you to join our free forum, read some posts... and when you're ready...share your challenges and wisdom."


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Topics - Thumper

1
Before our son moved 650 miles away our relationship was healthy and strong. He has been away for 7 years. He met his wife 6 years ago and has been married for 4 years. We now have a grandson. My DIL is from a family that makes it no secret they do not like people. My DIL was never taught social skills and ruled her parents roost while growing up. Unfortunately she has never given us the respect we give to her and our son gives to her parents. My son and husband speak on the phone daily because of our sons risky job. During our last visit my DIL voiced her dislike for my husbands advice to our son. For example the baby was fussy and so my husband said perhaps he was hungry or teething. My DIL called me to instruct us to stop suggesting these things...the baby is only fussy with our son! A week later the baby's first tooth came in. I keep my mouth shut with her and turn the other cheek when she tells me I'm goofy. There have been no plans to come home to visit us and if we want to see our son and the baby we travel down to them. But are instructed by DIL we can only stay a few days...one day for travel - the next full day of a visit and have to leave the next day. Which is fine, we don't want to interfere. But now our son has stopped calling my husband and during our last visit his joke telling and smiles have gone away. His good neighbor friend no longer comes to say hi when we arrive...our son says he isn't sure what happened to their friendship. I just wanted to share that as a mother of a son, it makes me sad that we won't be in his life to share. Not to meddle in his private life but to share and be included in this next phase of his life with his little boy. I will get on with re inventing things to keep me from having a broken heart. Thanks for letting me share.