My middle GD was adopted, to make a long story short, she was taken from the mother , the father, my son, did not fulfill everything he needed to do , GD went into foster care and was adopted. we had her for 6 months as foster care parents , but decided due to some health issues not to adopt her, we became close with the adoptive parents and still maintain a close relationship with our granddaughter.
Here is the issue, the maternal adoptive grandmother seems to be very jealous or envious, of our GD relationship with us. While i can understand she wants to be "the grandma" she seems to have the need to prove something when we are around. If GD or her adoptive sister come up to us to give us a hug , she must also have one and will force one on the child. She makes sure to tell us how involved she is in GD sports, dance and just life in general.
When we go to her B-day parties we are introduced to people we do not know by the adoptive grandmother , by our names not that we are her biological grandparents or her grandparents at all. While i find this annoying, i just brush it off, what i cannot brush off is she does the same thing to my GD half sister who is 8 GD is 6. she will introduce older GD by name and not this is GD sister.
We have never forced ourselves in the mix, we will not fight for GD attention, the look on her face when she sees we are there is enough.
I guess my question is, how do i go about letting the adoptive grandmother realize i am not a threat? If i brought it up to her she would never admit it, but i have every intention of being in my GD life so i don't know how to ease her mind