WiseWomenUnite.com

Problem Solving => Daughter in Laws and/or Son in Laws => Topic started by: 2chickiebaby on January 25, 2010, 04:42:12 PM

Title: We're Very Popular
Post by: 2chickiebaby on January 25, 2010, 04:42:12 PM
It's the most amazing thing to see our conversations reversed somewhere else.    The flip side so to speak. 

I think we might become more popular than anyone else and that makes people really mad.   

We're not "crazy crones" either
Title: Re: We're Very Popular
Post by: luise.volta on January 25, 2010, 05:28:52 PM
"Somewhere else" may not be where you are loved to pieces. Be kind to yourself and hang around "home."  When we want to heal, we need to stay out of harm's way if we have a choice. ;) Love you!
Title: Re: We're Very Popular
Post by: 2chickiebaby on January 25, 2010, 05:33:49 PM
But what if we find one of our beloved member's DILs on there talking about her?  What should we do?  Should we tell her? 

I love you too
Title: Re: We're Very Popular
Post by: Orly on January 25, 2010, 05:46:59 PM
Chickie,
WHAT IF we do find one of our beloved member's DIL on there talking about her?  Our members are clued in on what their DILs say about them, would one really want to have it pointed out?  I'm sorry but, I'd rather be applying the salve to a hurt, than poking the bruise.
Title: Re: We're Very Popular
Post by: 2chickiebaby on January 25, 2010, 05:58:57 PM
Orly, thank you for pointing that out.  It's just bad and it hurts me to see it.  I don't want them hurt.
Title: Re: We're Very Popular
Post by: cremebrulee on January 26, 2010, 05:42:04 AM
Chickie, what they say and do, justifies in they're own hearts they're own actions...it's survival....for them....they have to turn everything around, b/c if they didn't they couldn't deal with the guilt of the lives they have effected in such a very sad way.

Oft times, I've read a DIL's story, where she says....Even DH agrees with me....(well, what else do you expect him to do?  ???)  You really think and believe he's going to tell you, your wrong, and get into a huge battle, I think not. 

Or I've seen wives say...yes, DH agrees with me....how many husbands do you know who disagree with they're wives....?  It's always yes, dear, your right....they learn pretty quickly what gives them peace....men cannot stand confrontation, stress and heavy duty responsibilty like women can...and it always amazes me, that wives will justify or compound they're feelings by saying, even DH agrees with me....when in fact, dear husband is doing the only thing he knows how to do and be to survive....without confrontation....

and I bet these are the same wives that when they're husband's come home, they run to the door to greet them, to flick and moan about they're hard days....men do not want to hear this....and I've always told my friends, the last thing your husband wants to hear when he comes thru the door is negative complaining...he is not your sounding board....don't make him be....be the other woman, and give him peace, if you had a hard day, call a girlfriend and complain...but do not be a constant complainer to husband...

and of course they are going to take what we say and twist it to suit they're own purpose...but I tell you this, you can pick out the bad DIL's with a ten foot poll...you know who the manipulative ones are, and are not....by the way they present themselves or justify they're actions....personally, I don't think they could live with themselves if they did otherwise....they must justify the pain they've cause so so many people, including they're own children....and there are many MIL's out there who are like our very own DIL's are....




Title: Re: We're Very Popular
Post by: luise.volta on January 26, 2010, 06:01:39 AM
Yes, Creme, there are a lot of people who can't cope and are in pain...who don't understand their feelings or have a clue that what they do could be any different.

Taking a moment, right now, to send out love and prayers...to all.
Title: Re: We're Very Popular
Post by: 2chickiebaby on January 26, 2010, 08:02:32 AM
Love back to you, Luise...much love.

I'm thankful for our site where people are decent.  We take that for granted sometimes when we see the hatred elsewhere. 

Title: Re: We're Very Popular
Post by: renny97 on February 08, 2010, 10:36:02 PM
 :) Yes, Chicki. You are so caring and straight forward. It has been a real healing place here. People are explaining their personal pain. It is not for others to doubt.

I don't know how I made it without this site. I used to agonize when I had to go to their house.

I have not visited that other site, and have no intention to do so. As stated, by another poster, I'll keep my "garbage" here.