I'm worried about Invisible. I know she's very depressed and needs so much support right now. I sent her a PM, knowing that would notify her and she wrote back that she is depressed. She has every reason to feel the way she does! I hope she's feeling better soon but would like to have a special post for her that she can check when she comes through.
She has had to listen to people telling her she is unlovable and now her GD has started. She has already lost her son, but this from her GD? She needs us. I would like to let her know how truly loved and beautiful she is. Somebody needs to tell her. I think we could be that "somebody" here. I hope she has other "somebodies" too! God knows she needs them...
Invisible, please check your posts! We're here for you, even if you feel so weak right now! Talk to us too! Even if we don't have the answers, we have the love and support waiting for you!
Invisible...You are NOT invisible to us!!!!! Come back here!!
Invisible,
I hope you gain a little comfort from knowing that we care and empathise with you.
I am so sorry for everything you are going through.
Be kind to yourself...and come back and talk to us.
RedRose
Invisable
Please feel better soon, and come back for strength if need be...we all love you and care....your doing a great thing...please stand strong and vigulant....hugs Creme
I sent her a PM asking her to come through and check her own post here. I hope she can feel all the love and hugs coming from us here and know we are thinking about her...
Invisible, you are so much a part of this community and your story has touched us all in so many ways! We need you and we love you.
Invisible...you are pretty darn visible here! Lots of love and encouragement is coming your way!
When I went down for the count after my son's death and his wife's (widow's) attack, the only thing that helped me was to know that I was fine before he was born, grew up (?) and married her...and I had once had a full life without either of them. With that in mind, I started to experience my life as full instead of empty and eventually, not overnight, that became real for me.
That may not help you...we are all so different.
I am sending all kinds of love and caring and "pings"...heart-to-heart.
Dear Invisible, we're all thinking of you. You are a valuable member of this site and have given many of us insight and support. I can only hope you feel you get those things as well. Best wishes.
luise.volta, Cocobars, 2 Chickiebaby, Red rose, Cremebrulee, Penstamen,
Thank you all from the bottom of my heart, for caring and expressing your care to give me strength. I do feel better knowing all of you emotionally support me.
I am depressed about the situation. I would be a cold and insensitive person if I weren't depressed. The loss of my only child has broken my heart beyond comprehension. The problem has been compounded by the hate overtly expressed towards me by my DIL. I know she has mental problems but that does not make the words or actions hurt less. She did not love my son and she wants nothing to do with me. I understand.
In this situation everyone looses. But my GD will suffer the most. What a shame.
Luise.volta your words ring true. I must learn to fulfill my life without my son or GD. As a young girl I was pregnant with my son. We grew up together. Losing him I lost my past, present and future. As my son would have said, " It is what it is." Thank you again for caring.
Quote from: luise.volta on February 05, 2010, 01:07:36 PM
Invisible...you are pretty darn visible here! Lots of love and encouragement is coming your way!
When I went down for the count after my son's death and his wife's (widow's) attack, the only thing that helped me was to know that I was fine before he was born, grew up (?) and married her...and I had once had a full life without either of them. With that in mind, I started to experience my life as full instead of empty and eventually, not overnight, that became real for me.
That may not help you...we are all so different.
I am sending all kinds of love and caring and "pings"...heart-to-heart.
:'( Don't know what to say. We love you invisible! Please don't be a stranger...
You will be in my thoughts and prayers and next to my heart!
Quote from: Invisible on February 06, 2010, 10:43:34 AM
luise.volta, Cocobars, 2 Chickiebaby, Red rose, Cremebrulee, Penstamen,
Thank you all from the bottom of my heart, for caring and expressing your care to give me strength. I do feel better knowing all of you emotionally support me.
I am depressed about the situation. I would be a cold and insensitive person if I weren't depressed. The loss of my only child has broken my heart beyond comprehension. The problem has been compounded by the hate overtly expressed towards me by my DIL. I know she has mental problems but that does not make the words or actions hurt less. She did not love my son and she wants nothing to do with me. I understand.
In this situation everyone looses. But my GD will suffer the most. What a shame.
Luise.volta your words ring true. I must learn to fulfill my life without my son or GD. As a young girl I was pregnant with my son. We grew up together. Losing him I lost my past, present and future. As my son would have said, " It is what it is." Thank you again for caring.
Invisible,
Your situation has been so difficult for you to live through. Having your son while you were young really would make you feel as if you are losing your past and your present.
It doesn't have to mean losing your future, even though I know right now you feel it's gone... You still have a full life ahead of you and I believe your son is able to smile on your life (and your GD's) from where he is right now. None of us knows what the future has in store for us. I've had so many unusual experiences that I have based my belief's on. I know not everyone has the same belief's I do, and they can be hard to hold onto when life gets in the way and something takes your breath away like this.
What I'm trying to say is that I pray for you each day and believe you have alot of life out there waiting for you! I believe God, or your son (loved ones), guardian angels or anyone from the other side sometimes reaches out on our behalf here and makes our lives better. It never seems like it when you are walking through that darkness and feeling so alone. I have never suffered the loss of my child, and can't begin to understand how what you have experienced has so deeply hurt you. I can only imagine, because it was my biggest fear as a parent! I hope you come to a place where you can see yourself as a survivor and can look ahead to that future, because I believe you have a very bright one. You are truly one of my hero's and I want you to find a wonderful future! I believe that son of yours is smiling down on you and his daughter, and all will be well for you both and if you truly look (watch) for signs you will find that to be true.
The future is something nobody can take away from you. NOBODY. It's something you can create if you can start dreaming for yourself. I believe you have reached a place where you care enough for yourself to start looking there and stop believing you have lost that "future." After all, I lost my future three years ago, and I'm still here. Not through the loss of a child, but it was devastating and paralyzing to me, along with other things that had happened at the same time.
I always felt such a connection with you. What you don't know about me is that I truly had lost everything too. Three years later may seem like too long to some, but each of us takes our own time healing. I haven't spoken about everything here because some of it is just too painful even now, but what I can say is that you have to give yourself time - time is the best healer. So many people don't understand that - but they don't have to know. You know why - because they are not you!
I am so proud of you! You remind me of something, a quote that I thought related to me also. I keep this on my bathroom mirror to remind me of who I am and where I'm going. It's a pretty simple little saying, but explains so much to me that my own future is still there and waiting for me to make it my own, yes even at my age. LOL!:
Just when the
caterpillar
thought the
world was over,
it became a butterfly!
Silly, huh! You find that thing that puts hope in your heart again, and start building from there! I believe there is a butterfly coming out of all this! I really do...
I hope you come back and find this. I know it's corny to some, and I am corney to some, but you have to look inside yourself, search outside yourself for signs and find the answers that are right for you. It doesn't matter what anyone else thinks...
Some of us walk through nightmares that others can't imagine or survive. I believe you can. If I can with my little life, then I know it's possible for someone like you! You are a hero, no matter what and your heart will tell you that someday! Well, besides me telling you that! You are my hero!
Invisible,extending heart felt sympathy.I'm a newbe, so i don't know your whole situation.I can't imagine how unbearable the pain and heart ache is for you.But I'm sure this web site is one of Gods way of helping you cope.
Coco writes so beautiful,what she wrote is so true.The women here amaze me,so much compassion and support.
Have you ever read, The Shack....by Wm Paul young, It's about God,and coping with the loss of a loved one.I loved it,and know a lot of people who felt the same way.
I'll keep you in my prayers,hoping you come back soon
Invisible,just another thought.......we feel the way we think,look at what Luise wrote again.When she kept looking at her self the way she was,it became real for her.
Your not unloving or invisible.Your "Incredable" how about changing your name from invisible to Incredable,because i know your going to be an Incredable role model for your GD,just a suggestion.
Quote from: Mominwaiting on February 07, 2010, 05:07:28 PM
Invisible,just another thought.......we feel the way we think,look at what Luise wrote again.When she kept looking at her self the way she was,it became real for her.
Your not unloving or invisible.Your "Incredable" how about changing your name from invisible to Incredable,because i know your going to be an Incredable role model for your GD,just a suggestion.
I'm so happy we have such compassionare women here! And yes, she is incredible. I hope she does.. :)
Dear Invisible (I MEAN INCREDIBLE),
I'm even a newer newbie than Mominwaiting so I wasn't familiar with your story. When I read your post, my eyes teared up and my heart broke. I can tell that you are a special woman with so much to offer - you deserve to be in relationships with loving people and it hurts me to know that your dil doesn't fit the bill - to put it lightly. I can feel your pain on so many levels. I agree with these wise women and I just know your future has some sunshine and rainbows in store for you. Simply put, time does heal. I hope you can feel my love and hugs, dear one.
Quote from: Hope on February 21, 2010, 08:53:40 AM
Dear Invisible (I MEAN INCREDIBLE),
I'm even a newer newbie than Mominwaiting so I wasn't familiar with your story. When I read your post, my eyes teared up and my heart broke. I can tell that you are a special woman with so much to offer - you deserve to be in relationships with loving people and it hurts me to know that your dil doesn't fit the bill - to put it lightly. I can feel your pain on so many levels. I agree with these wise women and I just know your future has some sunshine and rainbows in store for you. Simply put, time does heal. I hope you can feel my love and hugs, dear one.
Well, Hope! You have chosen a fitting name! You definately belong here with your large heart!
I like how you started your post! You have put value where it belongs and we are so honored to have to here! :)
I've seen invisible fluttering around talking on posts. I think she will be back as a butterfly in time! She has that heart, you know, of a butterfly!
Control is an illusion. The only thing we can be assured of in life's journey is change. If we struggle to control change we are fighting a losing battle. It is not possible to maintain the status quo.
I am pushing myself through to accept the loss of my only son and only grandchild. I have to think in my mind they both died on that motorcycle. After I accept the loss of my little family then I can stop trying to control the impossible.
I would do so much for my GD but it just isn't possible. My DIL is hateful and jealous of me. She will continue to use her daughter as an extension of herself. Anything she can say or do to hurt me she will do. Enough is enough. My son would have been so disappointed by the outcome of this situation.
I have not asked to see my GD since Feb. 30. She has been telling me, that she doesn't like to come over. She only comes over because her mother makes her. My GD is out right cruel to me. It is almost shocking. I know she is being abused and neglected. But there is only so much I can endure. I can not control what is happening. The Department of Family Services and the School knows about the situation.
I am moving on with my life. I have removed all her belonging out of my house. My son has been dead for 30 months. I still can not sleep. Everyday I pray to God please let this be the last day on earth. But still another miserable day starts again. I think if I could get a part time job or volunteer somewhere might take my mind off of problems. But to be honest I just don't have the desire or energy.
My daughter in law is on drugs and alcohol. She has covered herself in tattoos and just this week dyed her hair pink. (I saw the photo on facebook) She takes nude photos of herself and posts them all over the internet. She is self absorbed and not capable of raising a child. I am afraid for my GD but there is nothing I can do to prevent this situation. After all, she is the child's mother. Nothing short of murder Child and Families Services will not separate the mother and child.
Quote from: cocobars on February 05, 2010, 08:12:55 AM
I'm worried about Invisible. I know she's very depressed and needs so much support right now. I sent her a PM, knowing that would notify her and she wrote back that she is depressed. She has every reason to feel the way she does! I hope she's feeling better soon but would like to have a special post for her that she can check when she comes through.
She has had to listen to people telling her she is unlovable and now her GD has started. She has already lost her son, but this from her GD? She needs us. I would like to let her know how truly loved and beautiful she is. Somebody needs to tell her. I think we could be that "somebody" here. I hope she has other "somebodies" too! God knows she needs them...
Invisible, please check your posts! We're here for you, even if you feel so weak right now! Talk to us too! Even if we don't have the answers, we have the love and support waiting for you!
Invisible,
I am so sorry, so sorry! that you have to deal with this on top of all you have. OH! It just breaks my heart. I know the only answer is to get out of their lives but that is so sad. You are right, you can't let the GDaugher talk to you that way. She's mirroring her mother, sadly. I know you know that.
I am thinking about you so much and praying for you too. Keep your chin up and please remember, we love you here. Small comfort, I know, but we do. :'(
Dear Invisible (or Incredible as Hope called you awhile back), your story is almost too sad to bear. I'm very honored that you are posting again, and we've all been so worried about you. I think it may be awhile before your GC realizes what you mean to her...she's being filled with all of her mother's influence right now, but she contains part of you and your son in her DNA. She may very well decide to not follow her mother's path and will need guidance from a positive, honorable source at that time. You need to take care of yourself for YOU right now. In the future you might be needed by GC again, so that's another reason to keep pushing forward. Know that we're thinking of you everyday. Such a small gesture for such a large pain, but here we are. Please stay.
I am moving on with my life. I have removed all her belonging out of my house. My son has been dead for 30 months. I still can not sleep. Everyday I pray to God please let this be the last day on earth. But still another miserable day starts again. I think if I could get a part time job or volunteer somewhere might take my mind off of problems. But to be honest I just don't have the desire or energy.
Invisible,I agree with penstamen,your story is almost too sad to bear.And after reading your post,your still not sleeping,your days are miserable,and you dont have the desire or energy.You sound like you are in a very very deep depression,and rightfully so.Any one would be,having to go thru what you are.If you dont mind me asking,are you seeing a Dr.or grief counselor?When i was in a real dark place in my life,i was just like this.I didn't know that after so long of being under so much
distress,your body quits producing serotonin.The Dr put me on antidepressant,with out replenishing the serotonin,i could of never managed to get enough strength to go on.It really helped get me over the hump.I didn't need to stay on them,just long enough to replenish the serotonin.
All of us here do worry and care about you.
Sending you love,and a hug
To Precious Invisible,
My heart is broken for you and I know your words are almost too hard to speak. All you wanted was to be a part of your son's child's life. I know that.
I want you to know that you are valued and that we care about you and your heart. We don't even know each other but I fel like I know your heart and it's a good heart. One that should be valued and loved.
You haven't done anything wrong.....please, you haven't! only tried for the sake of your son and his child to make a difference. We love you.
Sending love again...
Invisable....please know we love you, and are there with you...
one thing you must face, which will be difficult....your GD unfortunately will adopt your DIL's personality...she's being mean to you and doesn't even realize it, b/c she thinks the way her mother reacts is ok....does that make sense...and I perceive that this child is going to grow up the same kind of person her mother is....it's very despairing, but, your right, there is not much you can do, unless child services takes over someday....and then be there for them....
the only other thing I could suggest, is, if ever your DIL comes to you and wants anything from you materially, like money, food, etc...don't give it to her...tell her, she gets what she needs only on your terms and that is, that she get into counseling with you, that she needs help...and if she fights it, then refuse helping her...that will be your only trump card...and stand your ground....
your in my thoughts and prayers dearheart.....
Love you
Creme
Cremebrulee,
You are so right! My GD is going to act just like her mom. She is going to have a long difficult road ahead of her. My DIL is teaching her daughter to be a bully. It is difficult to grow up in a house with a mentally ill parent.
Right now my DIL has money ...I don't know how much may be aroung 1 million from the death of my son and inhearatence. Her house is paid for and she has a new car. I say new ..it is about 5 years old. I doubt she would come to me EVER to ask for money. I would be extremely reluctant to grant any such request. I think she knows better. She is crazy but not that crazy. She would never agree to see a coulselor.
Quote from: cremebrulee on March 11, 2010, 08:43:36 AM
Invisable....please know we love you, and are there with you...
one thing you must face, which will be difficult....your GD unfortunately will adopt your DIL's personality...she's being mean to you and doesn't even realize it, b/c she thinks the way her mother reacts is ok....does that make sense...and I perceive that this child is going to grow up the same kind of person her mother is....it's very despairing, but, your right, there is not much you can do, unless child services takes over someday....and then be there for them....
the only other thing I could suggest, is, if ever your DIL comes to you and wants anything from you materially, like money, food, etc...don't give it to her...tell her, she gets what she needs only on your terms and that is, that she get into counseling with you, that she needs help...and if she fights it, then refuse helping her...that will be your only trump card...and stand your ground....
your in my thoughts and prayers dearheart.....
Love you
Creme
Invisible - I mean INCREDIBLE! I haven't had a chance to read this post, but peeked in and saw you had come through. I just want to shoot you a very quick not to tell you that I am so happy to see you here! I have thought about you so much! I have prayed for you so much and I'm coming back through later to check and see what you wrote!
I was just excited to see this passing through. We have missed you so much and worried about you!
I don't think I can read this right now. I'm sitting her bawling at my desk. Invisible, I've been so worried about you and how you are doing. I'll be back through later today to read this when I get some private time.
Mominwaiting,
Absolutely! I am depressed. There is no doubt in my mind. I don't want to go anywhere or do anything. I am proud of myself for getting out of bed and going for a walk ..most days. I have considered the doctor but I am reluctant about going. Perhaps, I will go to the health food store and purchase serotonin.
I feel my lifes work was for nothing.
Quote from: Mominwaiting on March 11, 2010, 08:31:35 AM
I am moving on with my life. I have removed all her belonging out of my house. My son has been dead for 30 months. I still can not sleep. Everyday I pray to God please let this be the last day on earth. But still another miserable day starts again. I think if I could get a part time job or volunteer somewhere might take my mind off of problems. But to be honest I just don't have the desire or energy.
Invisible,I agree with penstamen,your story is almost too sad to bear.And after reading your post,your still not sleeping,your days are miserable,and you dont have the desire or energy.You sound like you are in a very very deep depression,and rightfully so.Any one would be,having to go thru what you are.If you dont mind me asking,are you seeing a Dr.or grief counselor?When i was in a real dark place in my life,i was just like this.I didn't know that after so long of being under so much
distress,your body quits producing serotonin.The Dr put me on antidepressant,with out replenishing the serotonin,i could of never managed to get enough strength to go on.It really helped get me over the hump.I didn't need to stay on them,just long enough to replenish the serotonin.
All of us here do worry and care about you.
Sending you love,and a hug
I am hugging you tight. Not a day goes by I don't cry. I have to cry to release all the stress.
Quote from: cocobars on March 11, 2010, 09:22:23 AM
Invisible - I mean INCREDIBLE! I haven't had a chance to read this post, but peeked in and saw you had come through. I just want to shoot you a very quick not to tell you that I am so happy to see you here! I have thought about you so much! I have prayed for you so much and I'm coming back through later to check and see what you wrote!
I was just excited to see this passing through. We have missed you so much and worried about you!
2chickiebaby,
Sometimes my GD talks to me like a dog. Her mom is a bully and she is teaching her daughter to be tough and mean to others. The school knows what is going on. I can tolerate that to some extent. However, I can not tolerate my DIL saying bad things about my son. I can not tolerate my GD repeating this nonsense. It breaks my heart.
Quote from: 2chickiebaby on March 11, 2010, 07:34:42 AM
Invisible,
I am so sorry, so sorry! that you have to deal with this on top of all you have. OH! It just breaks my heart. I know the only answer is to get out of their lives but that is so sad. You are right, you can't let the GDaugher talk to you that way. She's mirroring her mother, sadly. I know you know that.
I am thinking about you so much and praying for you too. Keep your chin up and please remember, we love you here. Small comfort, I know, but we do. :'(
I don't blame you for feeling this way, Invisible. You have every right to feel it. Your little GDaughter doesn't know what she's doing unfortunately. The problem is that when she grows up, no one will like her and she won't know why.
Maybe then, you can be her soft place. I just don't know but I wish we could all adopt Luise's motto of "do me wrong and I'll pong you".
I don't have the skills to do it but I envy people who do. I need them!!
I know, coco....it is heartbreaking.. Incredible deserves nothing but the best and she isn't getting it. I wish she knew how strong and good she really is. :)
There was no doubt in my mind either,I just didn't know if you knew about how our body's quit producing serotonin.I was very reluctant too,about going to the Dr.I dont like to take medication.
After i went though,i wished i would of gone sooner.I know health food stores do have a really good natural herb,that helps you to go to sleep.I just cant remember the name,but I'm sure if you ask them they would know.I believe it is melatonin.
I'm proud of you too,for getting out and walking,that will help also.
I also understand how you feel about your lifes work has been for nothing,right now thats how you feel,and thats part of the depression also.But your lifes work has been for a lot of wonderful things,that will become a lot clearer when the depression lifts.
Sending prayers, and blessings,
and a big Hug
Invisible, I agree with your statement, "The only thing we can be assured of in life's journey is change." Sometimes that "change" is unexpected and devastating, like your sons passing, but I truly believe a statement Luise put into words a week or two ago, "from these dark places, miracles are born." I also see something very symbolic in the caterpillar's emergence from dark cocoons, transformed as butterflies, flying away into an expansion of their previous lives, beautifully recreated from that darkness! I believe Luise and I found different ways of saying the same thing. I think you are in that darkness and I have so many hopes for you! You are taking each day as you can at your own pace, even if you don't see that yet. I certainly understand feeling as if your GD died on that motorcycle with your son and agree with you that right now those feelings are valid. The thought of what you are feeling makes me want to hug you even more and keep you very close.
You're right, there may be nothing you can do to help your GC, but that doesn't mean you have to go on that motorcycle ride too? The fact that you say you are getting out of bed and taking a walk is a step. One to be personally proud of and I hope that precludes other steps toward seeing you smiling again. But, if you can find the energy to take a walk, then maybe you can call a counselor or mental health center for counseling? Many of the centers will take people on a sliding scale, which means, if you are unemployed – FREE! I have done it before and found the support through counselling was much better than anything else. I hope you do because you need so much support right now and I know in my heart that you have the strength it takes to be happy again! All it takes is one phone call, one day, and only when you feel you have the strength to make a call...
I agree with you (and hope I don't get in trouble for saying this), but sometimes we have to give up on these situations and people who are hurting us so deeply. I believe you are faced with so much right now that the hatred you are enduring may be too much. Only you know that for sure, and you are the only one who knows if it's time to say it's enough, or if you have the strength to continue, but sometimes I've found I've had to say "enough" too! Whatever you are feeling, we are still here for you and you are loved and thought of every day of your life! This is unconditional! I believe you are a hero, not matter what you decide, simply because surviving what you have so far, makes you this person!
I pray that you find the strength you need to be happy again and emerge from this dark place as the beautiful soul I have seen! You have a lot to give the world. I know I'm a dreamer, but I hope someday you will believe in miracles to and dream again too (and join me -LOL)! I wish you could see yourself through my eyes. In the meantime, I'm keeping you in my thoughts and prayers – and I will still be here waiting for the day you come through and change your name to the name Mominwaiting gave you. One we have all repeated since she named you – "Incredible," because I think I'll know then that you are starting to fly!
Hugging you tight, Invisible! We are here for you!
Please don't give up on yourself. You are stronger than you think and have already survived so much! I think good things are waiting for you!
Invisible...Your health has to be number 1 right now. Get yourself feeling better. Seek help from a doctor...it is their job to help when we are feeling down.
Your situation is so upsetting. When children repeat cruel words that we know they are only repeating ... it still hurts.
I know you are feeling so helpless right now..but, YOU are a strong and wise lady. You can make good things happen in your life again because YOU want them to.. YOU need them too.
We are all here for you. (((Hugs)))
Oh, my heart breaks for you!. I'm new here, so I'm still wet behind the ears. You have been through so much and have suffered so. Please take care of youself. Red gave you some excellent advice. Your main concern now should be for yourself and your physical and mental health. You deserve to be happy and you really can be again. Depression can make you feel like you're stuck in quicksand, but you're already taking steps out of it like taking your walks. Just take a few more and, like Coco said, you will become Invincable. Big hugs sent your way, Momma
Momma Cat, I don't think you're wet behind the ears at all! When you came through the door, you shared your own personal heartache with us! You were very brave and came back to share your support as well!
I hope you have the time to read invisible's entire post. She really is an incredible woman and I hope she gets the support she needs to "open that cuccoon and fly!" I'm happy you're here Momma Cat!
Invisible,hope your having a better day.
Please dont stay gone for more than a day.
We want you to feel our love and support every day.
Sending love and a hug
I want to thank everyone for their continued emotional support. Life is full of hills and valleys. Losing my only child ...took the wind out of my sails. Compound my pain and sorrow with a DIL from hell. No, life isn't fair. Thanks again.
Invisible,thanks for posting,we worry so much about you.
Have you thought any more about going to see a Dr.?Like i said,I was very reluctant also,But so glad i finally did.You will be amazed at the compassion they will have for you.
Please,please,just make that one phone call.
Can i get you to promise me you will call?
I'm just so happy to see you here! We really miss you incredible!
"You deserve to be happy and you really can be again." I agree with Momma Cat.
Life will get better for you Invisible. ((hugs))
To the woman who feels invisible,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,but is actually incredible and invincable,
Sounds silly, but would you please cross your arms across your chest and hug yourself? It is really from me, but since I can't physically do it, can you help me out? When I went through my most painful time in my life, I would do that when I went to bed and it really was comforting. I believe that hugs will help you through this along with counseling. I see a lot of wisdom in MIW's counseling suggestion (as well as many of our other friends). I can't begin to know the pain you are feeling - it would be incredibly unbearable. I wouldn't expect anyone to go through that without professional help. I agree with you - life is not fair. Life is a mystery, but I think you have smiles and sunshine in your future.
Don't forget to wrap yourself with my hug, please.
Love you, Hope
What beautiful advice, Hope! I'm going to try that sometime too! I hope you don't mind...
Quote from: cocobars on March 14, 2010, 12:33:29 PM
What beautiful advice, Hope! I'm going to try that sometime too! I hope you don't mind...
When you do, please give yourself a hug from me, too! Thanks for all your support, Coco.
we're all huggin you invisible, and we continually keep you in our thoughts and prayers....please feel the strength coming from all of us here....
hugs
creme
I agree Invisible - I mean INCREDIBLE! Keep your chin and take care of "you!" Don't worry about moving slowly or not even feeling like you're getting anywhere at all. I went through a period like this and understand where you're at. Of course it didn't include losing my son and GC, but what I can say about it is that I felt I wasn't going anywhere at all for the longest time. It felt like I was taking 3 or 4 steps back for each one I took, and I know this sound like a long time, but after about a year and a half I looked back and realized I had gotten somewhere. I wasn't feeling good, but I was better than I was and saw little things that I was interested in again. That was a big turning point for me, just to realize that I was better. It's been very slow, for me. Just be very easy and understanding on yourself and your progress. Nobody says you have to get over it fast, and maybe not at all. I just believe there is a butterfly in you too, I really see that! Even if you don't right now.
The women here are thinking about you and loving you from a distance maybe, but we are here for you! I hope you will come back through and gather what strength we can offer up to you! You have an intelligent and beautiful heart and you are very deserving of all the love we want to give you! I hope you can hang on to that and know we are at your back and on your sides, loving you!
Hope you are feeling better soon!
You are not alone here. We care. ?
Quote from: HappyDays09 on March 18, 2010, 11:01:09 AM
Hope you are feeling better soon!
You are not alone here. We care. <3 (hearts now come out as question marks)
((((Invisible))))
Stilll keeping thoughts of you in my heart, Invisible, and I hope things are better for you. :(
Sending out love and hugs to the universe. I hope you feel them wherever you are...
Thank you for thinking of me. No, I haven't seen my GD since January. It doesn't look like I will see her any time in the future. I can't report any good or positive news. I am still trying to find a rainbow in all of this sorrow....but nothing. As my son would say, " It is what it is." Thanks again for sending positive vibes my way. Take care and hug your children...you never know if you will ever see them again.
Invisible, I think of you every day. I hope you know how much we care about you {{{hugs}}}
Invisible,
You are loved.
Warm hugs, Hope
My son's birthday is coming up in June. I am planning a cook out and balloon release in the park. I have invited a few of his friends. Last year no one showed up. I am hoping for a better turn out this year. I still have not seen my only granddaughter since January. My DIL has abused her twice...the police say one more time and she will be arrested. When the money runs out her stress level will elevate. That is most likely when she will snap. Just waiting....and taking a pilates class on Thursdays.
You are incredible,not invisible any longer..........I'm so happy your taking Pilate's,and hope your sons birthday celebration turns out well for you.Know that your in my thoughts and prayers that day.
Stay strong,your granddaughter will need you.You will be an incredible role model for her!
Sending love and a hug
Invisible, I've been so concerned about you. It seems as though you're progressing and taking care of yourself. It's good to hear from you!
Invisible,
I'm hoping for a great turn out this year for your son's birthday - what a great idea! If your gd's mom is arrested, what will happen to your gd? Is there a chance you would keep her? I feel bad to think that it would take her being abused again to get any results. What is wrong with our justice system? It's sooooo frustrating.
Hugs, Hope
Hey there Invisible. I am very, very new here and do not know your entire story, but from reading this thread, I am so sorry you are hurting. I have never seen such a compassionate group of women together in one place that give such support, wisdom and kind words.
I am not even going to pretend that I know what you are going thru, but I do know how it feels to not see your GC. I have not seen mine since November of last year and I miss her everyday. So I can relate to you on that one and am so sorry you haven't seen her. But you know what? We will!
Also, I have decided if you are going to keep this name, I will just think of it as this:
I - Intelligent
N - Nice
V - Vivacious
I - Iridescent
S - Smoltry
I - Incredible
B - Beautiful
L - Loved
E - Earnest
God bless you Invisible....you and yours are in my thoughts and prayers....
Your a brave lady...
I really dont know what to say. But do you feel all the love of all these beautiful hearts in this community. Of course you are loved, You have a future and start now....baby steps. One day at a time looking for those small things that can give you pleasure, joy and hope. What does not kill us makes us stronger (so they say). I am a believer and always think that God will compensate us for all our suffering. That is why he is my Best Friend. When I am discouraged or hopeless....I put myself in his hands and he sometimes have to carry me.
The sun will shine again for you tomorrow.
Love
I will keep you in my prayers.
Good to know that you're "hanging in." Sending love...
Hi Everyone,
Just checking in...I'm afraid I don't have any good news. I still cry alot. No, I haven't seen my GD since Jan. Don't think I will any time in the near future. Take care and keep my GD in your prayers.
Oh my, it's so good to see you and hear from you...I just wish things were better for you...I know your in a lot of pain, and you must be very tired and weak from all this...please know your in my thoughts and prayers...persevere and keep knowing, one day, your GD will be with you...believe it and be strong in your faith...know that you were, in my thoughts all this time...
much love
Creme
Quote from: cremebrulee on October 02, 2010, 01:44:34 PM
Oh my, it's so good to see you and hear from you...I just wish things were better for you...I know your in a lot of pain, and you must be very tired and weak from all this...please know your in my thoughts and prayers...persevere and keep knowing, one day, your GD will be with you...believe it and be strong in your faith...know that you were, in my thoughts all this time...
much love
Creme
Me too, Invisible. Please know that you are in my thoughts and prayers. You are not forgotten. Like Creme said, keep strong and know that one day you will see your grandchild again. Never give up hope.
Invisible,
I was so worried about you. I'm glad you posted, but wish you had good news. :'( My heart aches for you and I want your situation to change so much. I'm hoping you will find some new interests to keep you occupied. You know we are always here for you.
Hugs, Hope
Invisible, you have a lot of support here. I'm glad you checked in with us. I think of you daily. {{{hugs}}}
Thanks for checking in. We are a powerful prayer-lobby! :) Sending love...
Incredible, your posts are heartbreaking, but you are strong and cared about by us. Did you see a Dr. If not don't be afraid to and antidepressants can really help some people. (I have had fantastic success with them, I believe they saved my life .)
Thinking of you
stay strong and get do help for yourself
Invisible:
Good to have you back. Nothing is forever....it will pass.
You and gc are in my prayers.
Love