It's been a rollercoaster over the past several days. On Wednesday my son spoke my D and came home later to tell me that she wasn't happy in her situation and wanted to come home. I asked my son is this something she wants or is this something you told her would be best for her. Because of course we think that but her actions prove otherwise. He said she would call me the next day. She gave him the impression that the living situation was a struggle. So the next day my son and H were prepared to go over and pick her and her things up and then we would talk about the conditions of her being here once again.
Long story short, it never happened. My H and son went over but it wasn't without some kind of drama on her end. Turns out the landlord where she was staying had no idea the renter had additional people in her apt so I am sure she got in trouble for that. My H also wanted to speak to her prior to see if her wanting to come home was genuine. Turns out she only wanted a better place to rest her head. He told her that if she didn't want to come home she didn't need to. She said she wasn't ready. That she was good where she was. I at this point was frustrated because I was at work in meetings and did not have any say as to what was going on as it was happening.
When I got home I spoke to my Son and H. My son explained that my D feels that with these people she may have some great opportunities when it comes to make up. Supposedly when she went to GA with these people she met some famous rappers and his assistant who asked her to help with make up and told her she could help her get some more gigs in the future. These guys she is living with are up and coming rappers, however the one she is taking to seems to have money funneled to him everyday. Although this is the case my D is seriously behind on all of her bills. I doubt that taking the fast track to being successful will help her, or trying to do so on his coat tails. Younger people seem to always want to skip the trainings, and degrees these days.
So my son took her back. I went later that evening when I got home from work with my son to return her things after the landlord had left the property. My D didn't look unhappy. I told her how disappointed I was that she wasn't willing to come home. She said she would but that she'd still wind up there. I told her coming home meant wanting to go to school, work and make something of yourself. This was what I was willing to help with. But at the same time I couldn't deal with the stress of her disappearing or not following through with the things we expect of her. So this may be for the best.
She mentioned how the apt she was staying at was broken into while they were away and how whoever broke in made holes in the walls and killed her guinea pig. She also mentioned that her friend that had some of her bins with her belongings threw out her things on the lawn and in the dumpster after a falling out. I told her that she needs to realize that even the people who she considers friends will do things to hurt you so you need to be careful and not so trusting. I don't like what is going on. But I cant control it and don't want this in my home. She really needs to figure things out and for now I will be an ear and I told her I would be her friend. She was surprised as she said, you always said you weren't my friend. I told her while you are living with me and I am responsible that is different. This is a different dynamic and our relationship will not be the same. Our relationship will depend on our communication and whatever you decide to talk to me about. I will be here to listen.
I met her roommate before I left. She too looks like she has issues. She mentioned how out of the group that is there my D is the only one who has a mom. She said my D would be ok and safe, she promised me that. I told her that as her Mom I needed to know that for myself. But I don't know or trust that girl, and she doesn't know how much my D threw away to be in the terrible situation with her. From my understanding they have to be out of that apt by the end of the month. The girl mentioned getting a home in another town. I am not sure how my D feels about that if she starts a new job here. So who knows where the wind will take them or what she bases her future decisions on. This is a new experience for all of them and I don't believe it will last long or work out the way they think i will. I just want her to be safe.