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General Category => Grab Bag => Topic started by: 2chickiebaby on January 20, 2010, 02:33:31 PM

Title: Pet Peeves
Post by: 2chickiebaby on January 20, 2010, 02:33:31 PM
What is your pet peeve?

Mine is a 'know it all spoiled brat'
Title: Re: Pet Peeves
Post by: RedRose on January 20, 2010, 04:06:34 PM
Dirty clothes left on the floor and

a "know it all spoiled brat"
Title: Re: Pet Peeves
Post by: Pen on January 20, 2010, 04:25:40 PM
Being judged unfairly by people with an agenda.
Title: Re: Pet Peeves
Post by: 2chickiebaby on January 20, 2010, 04:29:40 PM
and, know it all spoiled brats
Title: Re: Pet Peeves
Post by: Pen on January 20, 2010, 04:30:36 PM
Oh, yes Chickie, especially by them.
Title: Re: Pet Peeves
Post by: 2chickiebaby on January 20, 2010, 04:32:30 PM
Okay, so far we've got:

Dirty clothes left on the floor, being judged unfairly by people with an agenda and know it all spoiled brats.
Title: Re: Pet Peeves
Post by: Orly on January 20, 2010, 06:38:56 PM
People who don't read the "DAY SLEEPER" signs and ring the bell to sell you something.  AND telemarketers that do not understand the phrase
"NO, please take this number OFF your call list"and argue with you about doing it.

My inability to remember names to faces.  I just hate that about myself.

Oh, and know-it-all, spoiled brats of ANY age.

Title: Re: Pet Peeves
Post by: Orly on January 20, 2010, 06:39:56 PM
Yes, I admit it....I'm peevish too!  Have more than one "pet".
Title: Re: Pet Peeves
Post by: Invisible on January 21, 2010, 06:10:17 AM
My biggest pet peeve would be inconsiderate people who say and do thing without considering the feelings of others.

For example; things people have said to me after the death of my son leaves me speechless. One lady told me I was lucky to loose my only child because at least now I don't have to worry about any children. Another lady told me it is not normal for a mother to grieve after 3 months.

Quote from: 2chickiebaby on January 20, 2010, 02:33:31 PM
What is your pet peeve?

Mine is a 'know it all spoiled brat'
Title: Re: Pet Peeves
Post by: 2chickiebaby on January 21, 2010, 06:26:32 AM
Oh!! my goodness, Invisible......those statements are not from a well meaning friend/friends.  Those are from people who are dumb as stumps.  How could they say those things to you?

Not normal to grieve?  That is so abnormal that you have to wonder about that friend.  I'd say that's not a friend but a mutation.

"Don't have to worry about any children?"  Are you kidding me?  I can't believe the gall of someone saying that to you after you lost your son!! 
Title: Re: Pet Peeves
Post by: cremebrulee on January 21, 2010, 06:55:08 AM
Quote from: Invisible on January 21, 2010, 06:10:17 AM
My biggest pet peeve would be inconsiderate people who say and do thing without considering the feelings of others.

For example; things people have said to me after the death of my son leaves me speechless. One lady told me I was lucky to loose my only child because at least now I don't have to worry about any children. Another lady told me it is not normal for a mother to grieve after 3 months.

Invisable, after reading this, I'm sitting here looking just like the icon you've chosen

I cannot believe these people came out with something like that?  I mean, I do know that people get very nervous in these situations and don't know what to say, and sometimes, say the wrong things, but, this?????? My God?  I can't believe people are so incensitive...unreal!
Title: Re: Pet Peeves
Post by: isitme? on January 21, 2010, 07:05:17 AM
manipulative people, inconsiderate people, emotionally unstable people and oh yeah.... SPOILED BRATS!

Dirty clothes left on the floor are not really my thing either - but I would choose that over emotionally unstable any day!
Title: Re: Pet Peeves
Post by: Invisible on January 21, 2010, 07:07:57 AM
Oh yes.....one neighbor told me she knew how I felt to lose a child, because she lost her dog once.....for a few days.

I know our animals seem to become members of our family. I have a dog and yes, I love him....however, I am sorry, losing a dog or cat is not the same.

People don't know what to say or do...so they say stupid thing and don't do anything. What happens to people who grieve is they become reclusive...just to protect themselves from "well meaning" people.
Title: Re: Pet Peeves
Post by: 2chickiebaby on January 21, 2010, 07:13:34 AM
of course you become reclusive...how else can you protect yourself from these people?  They are everywhere.  I'm so sorry you had to deal with that on top of your great loss. 
Title: Re: Pet Peeves
Post by: cremebrulee on January 21, 2010, 07:29:18 AM
Quote from: Invisible on January 21, 2010, 07:07:57 AM
Oh yes.....one neighbor told me she knew how I felt to lose a child, because she lost her dog once.....for a few days.

I know our animals seem to become members of our family. I have a dog and yes, I love him....however, I am sorry, losing a dog or cat is not the same.

People don't know what to say or do...so they say stupid thing and don't do anything. What happens to people who grieve is they become reclusive...just to protect themselves from "well meaning" people.

people, unfortunately do not think before they speak...I'm so so sorry, you've had to go thru this...hugs....

when My foster mom was dying, people would say, "Well, she IS 92?"  and I'd reply..."she still my mom".
Title: Re: Pet Peeves
Post by: Pen on January 21, 2010, 08:03:43 AM
Invisible, I've also heard similar things said to dear friends who've lost children. One woman said, probably thinking she was being helpful, "He's where he belongs. He's in a better place." My friend screamed at her, "He belongs here with me!" and walked away. She'd heard just about enough.
Title: Re: Pet Peeves
Post by: RedRose on January 21, 2010, 01:53:53 PM
The best gift you can give a person who has lost a loved one, is a heart felt letter about that Child (Husband, Wife, Mother, Father, Friend, Co-Worker). Your most lovely moments with them. How you felt about that person and how you will miss that person.

I still have a letter given to me from a co-worker. Two pages of things he will always remember about his friend, my first husband.  My daughter knows about it...I'm ready to share it...when she is ready!
Title: Re: Pet Peeves
Post by: Invisible on January 22, 2010, 06:51:27 AM
Cremebrulee,
I am sorry you were subjected to inconsiderated remarks while grieving the loss of your mom. Most people don't know what to say so they put their foot in their mouth. We grieve the loss of someone we love. No, it does not matter if they are 92 or an unborn child. The love we share never dies. We go on loving and grieving our loss for the rest of our lives.

Penstamen,
Yes, I have had that particular statement said to me. It makes me angry too. I have a minister in my extended family. Recently, he lost his daughter due to the N1H1 virus. She died very quickly...within 2 weeks. He puts on a front for everyone as if he doesn't mind his daughter is gone. He claims not to be grieving because he knows his daughter is with God. Personally, as a mother, I would bet he cries himself to sleep. But I will never know.

Anna,
I am sure a mother would grieve the loss of each and everyone of her children. For someone to say, "At least you have another" is a thoughtless attempt at consoling. What a stupid thing to say.

Redrose,
Yes....Yes...I agree. A letter is the most beautiful gesture. What a wonderful response to a grieving friend. I would have worn the paper out reading and reading the letter.
Title: Re: Pet Peeves
Post by: cremebrulee on January 22, 2010, 09:41:15 AM
Quote from: RedRose on January 21, 2010, 01:53:53 PM
The best gift you can give a person who has lost a loved one, is a heart felt letter about that Child (Husband, Wife, Mother, Father, Friend, Co-Worker). Your most lovely moments with them. How you felt about that person and how you will miss that person.

I still have a letter given to me from a co-worker. Two pages of things he will always remember about his friend, my first husband.  My daughter knows about it...I'm ready to share it...when she is ready!

Ohhhh yes, it would be a memorable jesture for someone who is grieving a loss...what a thoughtful thing for your co-worker to do...

and it is people who do things like that, that make up for the bad ones...yanno...it's just a God sent to know those caring souls...
Title: Re: Pet Peeves
Post by: 2chickiebaby on January 22, 2010, 11:16:56 AM
Cry with that person....let that person KNOW that you know the pain of their loss.  I guess some people don't know that kind of pain but I can tell you, comforting people at the time of your loss and the way they treat you, what they say and don't say, is seared in your memory forever.  It is so strange the way that is.  It's like time stands still in those moments.

I remember every single detail that was said to me, the faces, the looks, the feeling they gave me,  everything.  I will as long as I live.