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Does your MIL live next door??

Started by catchingup, February 09, 2011, 11:46:13 AM

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catchingup

February 09, 2011, 11:46:13 AM Last Edit: February 09, 2011, 11:47:47 AM by catchingup

I had to go on a call today and this lady I saw lived in a house on a property with 2 houses on it.
She is  such a cheerful person and she told me her MIL lives in the other house.
"Your MIL"?!!! Lives next door." Do you get on well with her"?
"Oh Yes!! I love her to bits. We have always hit it off"
That icon going across there is "Shocked" ;D

:o

cremebrulee

Quote from: catchingup on February 09, 2011, 11:46:13 AM

I had to go on a call today and this lady I saw lived in a house on a property with 2 houses on it.
She is  such a cheerful person and she told me her MIL lives in the other house.
"Your MIL"?!!! Lives next door." Do you get on well with her"?
"Oh Yes!! I love her to bits. We have always hit it off"
That icon going across there is "Shocked" ;D

:o

don't be shocked, there are tons of DIL's/Mil's out there who get on very well....I have a friend, whose DIL's love her to death, and plan all kinds of events for her, as a matter of fact, the entire family is close, and they live all over the U.S. now, however, they go on vacations together, have a shore home, and for the summer months, the DIL's bring they're children to the shore home and the husbands come down on weekends.

Honestly, you'd be shocked how many are out there who do get along famously, the difference is, they have no need to be on the internet posting, b/c they have no problems...and there are always family politics, it's all in how you handle them. (in some cases)  ;D


catchingup


Yes I guess there are happy MIL DIL relationships.
This was meant to be a fun post.
I could not help but think that this lady was so cheerful because she had a nice MIL or maybe she got on with her MIL because her MIL could not resist her cheerfulness --Who knows?

holliberri

My girlfriend is about to get married. She lives next door to her FSIL (who introduced her to her now-FH). They can't stand one another. They fight as they take out the trash. Both of their stories make me laugh.

I hope they work it out someday. They are soon going to be married to brothers. I can't imagine that holiday dinner...

catchingup


There must have been a time when they did get on if she introduced her to someone.
Maybe she prefers the other brother (The one her SIL is marrying) and regrets introducing them.
Who knows.  :-\

holliberri

She said she only introduced them for a fling (she ran into the bride to be at a bar), nothing serious. I guess it got too serious for her!

I think if she can spot a possible couple that quick, she should quit her day job!

luise.volta

Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible. Dalai Lama

Pooh

We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us. -
Joseph Campbell

Pen

Catchingup, I do think one's attitude going in can set the tone. Not a fakey-fakey suck up attitude that changes the minute the ring is on DIL's finger (my DIL?) but an honest desire to be civil and perhaps even friendly for the sake of harmony in the family. If MIL & DIL truly love their DS/DH, you'd think they'd want to get along for his benefit.

Will you have more visits with this duo? It would be interesting to see how they progress as time goes by.
Respect ... is appreciation of the separateness of the other person, of the ways in which he or she is unique.
-- Annie Gottlieb

catchingup

MIL is in her eighties and DIL is 60 so the progress has been ongoing
They built the house for MIL on their plot when FIL died

Mariatobe

If MIL & DIL truly love their DS/DH, you'd think they'd want to get along for his benefit.

Pen - I love my DH, my MIL loves my DH, but it is impossible sometimes to get along.  It's like oil and water.
I was going out with a man for a long time who had wonderful parents. I would visit with them, we'd do things with them, they treated me like family and vice versa.  Unfortunatly, he passed away.  I wish I could have them for in-laws.  But sadly you don't get to choose. 

Sometimes it just doesn't work.  My MIL now is a narcissitic person (who was diagnosed by the way by a licensed counselor so I'm not just saying that)  She brags about money and people who she perceives as socially as good as she is, who she says are "friends of theirs".  This is non stop.  It is both tiresome and frustrating.  My husband deals with it because "that's just how she is."  But she is SO different from me.  So we get along when we have to see each other, but other than that, I don't have contact with her.

So, I guess you could say, we get along for his benefit, but it will NEVER be more. 

Pooh

I see nothing wrong with that Maria.  I married my DH, not his family, but it is still a package deal.  I don't have to love all of them or even like all of them, but I can still be nice and make an effort.
We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us. -
Joseph Campbell

LaurieS

You can't force love can ya... but you can be polite, mannerly, lol and well groomed, that we do have control over.  I say that as my dd and bf are going to arrive soon and I'm still in my caftan (moo-moo to you who don't wear them) and needing a shower.

Pooh

You have no excuse now, you got a new blow dryer.
We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us. -
Joseph Campbell

LaurieS

oh my gosh.. yes I do.. ok.. jumping into the shower...  I had my son and his gf on skype today and forgot to ask if they ever saw one of those gun dryers... have you seen the boob scarfs?