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emotions

Started by cadagi101, September 21, 2010, 04:54:03 PM

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cadagi101

good morning all,
I just felt compelled to write this.   No reason just felt emotional.   This morning I opened the first post, happy birthday wishes, made me happy so many people jumped in to give there birthday greetings.    Then keys is strong and an inspiration to me.    Then some light hearted posts and WW lives changing and feeling stronger everyday from posting and having had concern and heartfelt advice from other WW.   By this stage I was felt I had to write how much satisfaction and pleasure that has come of these posts and it seemed a happier note was in the air.    Then I felt really sad for MP situation.    I just hope and pray she finds happiness, she has certainly posted much needed advice at times I for one will miss her.   

The next few posts were really distressful and WW are hurting so much..and I feel powerless I just wish I could take the pain away we suffer and struggle with life.    i then get joy out of Luise's words.  Luise, would you ever consider posting them all  in one spot so I can save them they are gems.    You have more wisdom and compassion than anyone I know.    How many people in this world are loved as much as you are?  By this time my emotions are all over the place.     
I will have a cup of tea now and will no doubt feel better,
have a lovely day everyone.

Pen

A cup of tea always helps...thanks for sharing your thoughts. This site does have emotional highs and lows; sometimes it hits out of thin air. Thank goodness all of the WW are here to offer support. I hope you have a nice evening. I'll join you in a cup of tea in a bit?
Respect ... is appreciation of the separateness of the other person, of the ways in which he or she is unique.
-- Annie Gottlieb

cremebrulee

Julia, Happy Belated Birthday  ;D


cdb

I may start trying this cup of tea soothing idea and think of all of you when drinking it. Happy Belated Birthday, Julia. Wishing you all the best in the upcoming year. cdb :)

Pooh

Dang!  Julia had a birthday and I missed that thread!  Sorry Julia....Happy Belated Birthday!

I think it helps me to remember when reading the forum, that everyone here is at a different place in their situations.  For people like Luise and Creme, they have made it through to the other side and manage to offer great wisdom and advice (not that you two are not human and have bad days too).  Although they are compassionate, they also see the foolishness we portray sometimes because they have "been there done that."

Many of us are somewhere in the middle.  We are still emotional but we know what we have to do and are working our way that direction, so we have mostly good days, and then bad days sneak up.  We are the ones that post funnies at times and then something someone says triggers something, then we post problems all of a sudden.  We are optimistic, but still looking for a fix.

Then some are just starting and all the pain is fresh and overwhelming and most of their days are bad right now.  They have a hard time seeing humor or advice right now.  They need to get their feelings out and be validated.

I think that is why we can go from upbeat to emotional sad posts very quickly.  Everyone here is at different places, and handle things differently.  I also think that we have many "A" personalities and many "B" personalities which creates conflict sometimes. (That just made me think of a new post and "A" and "B").
We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us. -
Joseph Campbell

barelythere

Quote from: Pooh on September 22, 2010, 06:09:51 AM
Dang!  Julia had a birthday and I missed that thread!  Sorry Julia....Happy Belated Birthday!

I think it helps me to remember when reading the forum, that everyone here is at a different place in their situations.  For people like Luise and Creme, they have made it through to the other side and manage to offer great wisdom and advice (not that you two are not human and have bad days too).  Although they are compassionate, they also see the foolishness we portray sometimes because they have "been there done that."

Many of us are somewhere in the middle.  We are still emotional but we know what we have to do and are working our way that direction, so we have mostly good days, and then bad days sneak up.  We are the ones that post funnies at times and then something someone says triggers something, then we post problems all of a sudden.  We are optimistic, but still looking for a fix.

Then some are just starting and all the pain is fresh and overwhelming and most of their days are bad right now.  They have a hard time seeing humor or advice right now.  They need to get their feelings out and be validated.

I think that is why we can go from upbeat to emotional sad posts very quickly.  Everyone here is at different places, and handle things differently.  I also think that we have many "A" personalities and many "B" personalities which creates conflict sometimes. (That just made me think of a new post and "A" and "B").

Pooh,  how true, how true!! We are all in different stages. Some are really at the bottom.  Those who have arrived, be kind to them. The journey is long and hard and takes many ins and outs. Those who aren't there, wait...I'm still struggling but am getting there.

cremebrulee

QuotePooh

I think it helps me to remember when reading the forum, that everyone here is at a different place in their situations.  For people like Luise and Creme, they have made it through to the other side and manage to offer great wisdom and advice (not that you two are not human and have bad days too).  Although they are compassionate, they also see the foolishness we portray sometimes because they have "been there done that."

Hugging you for knowing that....I don't know if I could have handled both my son being in Afghanistan, while still at war with my DIL...stress is very bad for MS, and of late, been having some problems...but son is coming home, actually in transit now....

I love my son dearly and always will, just like everyone here, and I miss him...miss our closeness, and sharing opinions, thoughts and heartfelt discussions with him...he is very easy to communicate with, and I love to hear his opinions on issues....and would love to know my DIL better....just like I knew my son..however, I also know, he is now a man....with a family, very busy and pre occupied, so I don't call him much at all, actually rarely....it's better that they call me when convenient.

As a mother, was never clingy...always encouraged him to go out into the world and get as much knowledge and life experience as he could....

People who know me, think I'm quit strong, but inside, I am not....just as weak as the next person, however, there are different ways of handling situations....and I choose not to cling or be like the MIL I had...yes, traditional holidays were changed, life as I knew it changed....and I was independent, so why did I expect that my son would be any different?  His major concern should be his family, not me....and my job is done, and realize, I take what I can get, and don't try and make them feel guilty b/c they are not at my house for this and that....I've learned to keep my mouth shut and realize, this is they're life, they're turn now....when your children leave the nest, it's time to let them go...I've been through enough in my life and don't want things to be hard for my son....he found the woman he loves, and I'm so happy for that, b/c she loves him to....

They've both grown, I've grown and very proud of them both...she's a good mother and wife....and has been a rock while he's been gone.  One thing very special about her is, she is able to let him go and accomplish....she has supported him 100% when it comes to life changes and his persuits...so, I couldn't want any more for him....

Life isn't over, it's just begun....and I'm looking so forward to every single day....is it sad that my son is now gone, yes, it is, but the truth is, it's life, normal and the way things are....to hold onto a son, to interfer with they're lives, is a very bad thing to do..and I view our indifferences, as a huge interference....I am so thankful to God, they didn't seperate....I don't think I could have lived with the guilt of "I was the reason they seperated".  And I think that is what also woke me up....

It just isn't healthy to want so much to be right, at all costs....it wasn't worth the fight, tears, heartbrak, despair and pain...never is....life was meant to enjoy...it's a gift, and to stagnate that gift reaps much saddness and disarry....

Thanks so much Pooh for your understanding....

Hugs
Creme


Pooh

I am so glad your son is on his way home safely!  Mine will finish his training somewhere around April and more than likely be headed that way. My daily chant now is "Withdraw before April.....Withdraw before April..."
We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us. -
Joseph Campbell

cremebrulee

Quote from: Pooh on September 22, 2010, 08:13:35 AM
I am so glad your son is on his way home safely!  Mine will finish his training somewhere around April and more than likely be headed that way. My daily chant now is "Withdraw before April.....Withdraw before April..."

yeah, I hear ya....it's very hard....very stressful....however, my son told me, for him, it was safer over there, then where he works on the police force....?  Maybe he was just trying to help us feel better? 

Hugs to you and family Pooh....know, my thoughts are with you all....

Pen

Quote from: cdb on September 22, 2010, 02:52:25 AM
I may start trying this cup of tea soothing idea and think of all of you when drinking it. Happy Belated Birthday, Julia. Wishing you all the best in the upcoming year. cdb :)

I'm a major coffee snob, and also love a decent cup of black tea, but can't do caffeine at night. I found a really tasty herbal tea called Sweet & Spicy, by Good Earth (I think.) We buy it at a one of the warehouse stores. It's like a calorie-free dessert (naturally very sweet, no additives.) Just the thing on a chilly autumn eve. Oh, happy Fall everyone!

And to you moms with DS/DD in uniform, may all come home safely. Your sacrifice, and that of your loved ones, is incredible. Glad to hear your good news  :D
Respect ... is appreciation of the separateness of the other person, of the ways in which he or she is unique.
-- Annie Gottlieb

Pooh

Thanks Pen.  I have found this is the most mixed up emotion ever.  I am so proud of him, but so scared at the same time.  I support him and smile, but cry when he leaves knowing the danger.  Weird position to be in.

My name is "Pooh" and I am a coff-a-holic.  I am truly.
We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us. -
Joseph Campbell

cremebrulee

Quote from: Pooh on September 22, 2010, 08:52:16 AM
Thanks Pen.  I have found this is the most mixed up emotion ever.  I am so proud of him, but so scared at the same time.  I support him and smile, but cry when he leaves knowing the danger.  Weird position to be in.

My name is "Pooh" and I am a coff-a-holic.  I am truly.

LOL, your a hoot and love your attitude....and psssst, by the way, I felt the same way about my son...scared to death, but very proud....we must support them, that's all we can do....it's all we can do, and means so much to them....

big big hugs to you...

Pooh

We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us. -
Joseph Campbell

cdb

Happy Belated Birthday Julia :) And my heart goes out to those whose son's were in Afghanistan and those that have serious medical problems. It is nice to finally take a little time (even without sleep) to read some other posts. This site does help. cdb