September 19, 2019, 12:16:15 am

News:

"Welcome to WiseWomenUnite.com -- When adult children marry and leave home, life can sometimes get more complex instead of simpler.  Being a mother-in-law or daughter-in-law can be tough.  How do we extend love and support to our mothers-in-law, adult children, daughters-in-law, sons-in-law, and grandchildren without interfering?  What do we do when there are communication problems?  How can we ask for help when we need it without being a burden?  And how do our family members feel about these issues?  We invite you to join our free forum, read some posts... and when you're ready...share your challenges and wisdom."


Had to call authorities for neglect of grandchild

Started by StainedGlassHeart, July 17, 2010, 09:01:33 am

Previous topic - Next topic

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

luise.volta

I can't see where "fair" has anything to do with what you're trying to deal with. Sending love...
Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible. Dalai Lama

JaneF

Such a sad subject. I know how hard it is to report DS or DD to family services, I had to do it myself. Have to try to protect kids though, they are defenseless. I hope all goes well for your situations. I called in because of a drug party at DD home a little over a year ago, and a man DIED right there from drug overdose, heart basically blew up. My grandsons were in that house at the time. Nothing was done, was told there really was nothing family services could do. Wow. It is true system has financial problems, and so many kids in the system already. My heart breaks for all the suffering children. If I was aware of abuse or neglect going on, I'd say report it. Whoever said if you don't and something awful happens you would never forgive yourself...was correct. We can only do what we can. Children are our future and they really do deserve to feel loved, and safe. If I was really rich I would say I'd probably spend a lot of money to help children in need. Blessings to you all.

Faithlooksup

Dear Friend,   My Heart is with you... You did the right thing...My advise..Do Not give up...
Continue calling childrens services on them, have someone take pictures...sooner or later someone is going to listen....And that I do Believe.....Do it for your GC and for your own peace of mind, it has to be done its as simple as that.  Also keep a journal on all of this--data is very important.
As far as the kitten goes--if you have a humane society in your area--do call them about this or the ASPCA in your area--for this is under neglect and abuse and the kitten will be removed they will also be ticketed (however I know that does not matter.)  It simply is another strike against them which can be brought up in a court of law.

Do not give up--let them say what they want to say--they are in the wrong and they know this so of course they have to make you look bad----for he who points the finger holds the blame.

Don't give up fight for that Baby----he needs you...   HUGS, Faith

MrsKitty

This is all very sad. I have a dear friend who has a relative who is a drug addict. The relative has abused and neglected her kids--at least one has even been molested because she just leaves those kids with anyone. My friend called the authorities (several other people did as well) and they took the kids away and gave the kids to their grandparents (the parents of the drug addicted mother). Unfortunately, the grandparents are enablers of the drug addict and allow her to live in their home WITH the children. So, pretty much nothing has changed and the drug addict mother is still abusing and neglecting her kids--only the grandparents are now just watching it all.   :(

My friend does not know what to do either.

MrsKitty

Quote from: Eva on October 22, 2010, 11:07:07 am

if our son dies  :'(
in some car accident as DIL is in charge of car repairs and brakes
his kids and his adopted kids will have same rights
to his estate and his insurance

we are just praying that DS would come to his senses


This statement really concerns me. Are you fearful that your DIL will try to murder your son (by cutting his brakes or something?)? If so, have you brought your concerns to the authorities?

Faithlooksup

Goodness,  Ladies, when you are dealing withsome whom is irrational, abusive to their children, lives in filth and lies~~anything is possible to happen...I do not blame Mom for fearing for her DS.
I would wonder and feel the same way.

Don't give up your fight.....HUGS, Faith

SunnyDays09

December 17, 2010, 01:57:05 pm #21 Last Edit: December 18, 2010, 08:39:33 am by HappyDays09
Quote from: MrsKitty on December 08, 2010, 01:49:21 pm
Quote from: Eva on October 22, 2010, 11:07:07 am

if our son dies  :'(
in some car accident as DIL is in charge of car repairs and brakes
his kids and his adopted kids will have same rights
to his estate and his insurance

we are just praying that DS would come to his senses


This statement really concerns me. Are you fearful that your DIL will try to murder your son (by cutting his brakes or something?)? If so, have you brought your concerns to the authorities?


SET UP TRUSTS.  Lawyers know about things such as this.  She won't be able to touch it - or have a reserved amount set for care for child(ren) so she is aware she wont be getting a  lump sum if something tragic happens.   Hope it never gets to this!!  God Be With YOU. 

Eva

Merry Christmas to all!

thank you for advise Happy Days 09
that  is what we did, we took our son from our will,
basically his 1/4 portion from our estate  would go to his 2 little girls,
but not to another children -be born in his new marriage or adopted..

and our oldest son would be a trustee for our 2 grand daughters
as he is their godfather

JudyJudyJudy

Well, I am not sure if you are still reading your replies but wanted to ask if you have ever thought of trying to get custody of that baby?  It sounds like you are in a position to do so if you can prove the mother unfit. 

It is a very, very sad situation you are in but I feel you did the right thing by reporting because if you know about abuse and do not report it, then it is almost like you are one of the abusers.  And, yes, you might have severed your relationship with your son but it sounds like you need to be away from that situation because it was abusing you too.  Also, your son might open his eyes one day and want more out of life than he currently has and come to you for help.

Just remember, even though as parents we did not raise our children like your son is doing, we also made our mistakes which were minor compared to what is happening in this situation but still mistakes.