Author Topic: Help Please.  (Read 882 times)

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Offline TryingToHelpMom

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Help Please.
« on: December 26, 2014, 07:35:45 PM »
So recently I got a call from my own mother. So there is a lot of conflict between my brother and her , it's just like that , today he randomly just came into the house and he went outside, my mom went to ask what he was doing and he said "mind your own business !". And she's really hurt by it and I just wanna make her happier so I'm asking what are some ways or things I could say to her to make her feel like she's not alone or to make her feel better. (As I do apologize for the grammar mistakes I am not well right now and I found this forum and It seems like a nice community that could help.
« Last Edit: December 26, 2014, 08:51:58 PM by luise.volta »

Offline Pen

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Re: Help Please.
« Reply #1 on: December 26, 2014, 09:01:36 PM »
Welcome, Trying. Please read the pink highlighted items under Open Me First on the home page. We ask this of all new members so everyone knows the policies of the site and can decide if the site is a good fit for them.

IMO, if you tell her about our community here and what you've learned from reading and posting, I think she'll realize that she's not alone. Unfortunately we can't change other people or their behavior; we can only change our reactions and responses. Many of us who have been here awhile have found ways to move on while practicing "loving detachment." None of us deserve to be treated poorly by our AC.

Respect ... is appreciation of the separateness of the other person, of the ways in which he or she is unique.
-- Annie Gottlieb

Offline luise.volta

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Re: Help Please.
« Reply #2 on: December 26, 2014, 09:30:51 PM »
Welcome! I see that Pen and I responded to you at the same time. I have changed my post accordingly. However, you will also notice that I have edited your initial post and will understand why after carefully reading the Forum Agreement. I also have removed the duplicate post.

Would it be possible for your mother to interact with us here? I think our one on one support might be helpful to her.

With my own son, it was a long, tough road for me to get that what he thought, said and did was about him, not me. It took even longer before I realized that my relationship to him as a parent was very different than my relationship to him as an adult. My expectations got in the way...and it was hard work for me to pass on the abuse and reestablish my self respect. Sending hugs...

Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible. Dalai Lama