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"Welcome to WiseWomenUnite.com -- When adult children marry and leave home, life can sometimes get more complex instead of simpler.  Being a mother-in-law or daughter-in-law can be tough.  How do we extend love and support to our mothers-in-law, adult children, daughters-in-law, sons-in-law, and grandchildren without interfering?  What do we do when there are communication problems?  How can we ask for help when we need it without being a burden?  And how do our family members feel about these issues?  We invite you to join our free forum, read some posts... and when you're ready...share your challenges and wisdom."


call them?

Started by stilltrying2010, July 10, 2013, 06:37:26 AM

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RecLucy

This thread hits home for me.  I don't initiate contact with my son and his family (wife and two children) because I know they are busy and don't want to interfere in their lives.  I have turned down very few invitations to visit them, but am not as close as I should be.  It is definitely a catch-22 situation as my Dil wants me to reach out more, but the fear of rejection is just too strong for me.  I have dealt with pushy extended family before and don't want to go there.

jdtm

I understand totally.  One DIL wants more interaction; and the other - none at all.  What's the saying - "once bitten twice shy".  So, when I do make contact, it is for a reason - a holiday, a birthday, etc.  And even then, I am reluctant to make contact because, I too, have been rejected (and that is putting it mildly).  It's hard, isn't it - so much easier when our children were young.  No real answer here - just empathizing ....

Pen

RecLucy, I haven't seen that you've been given a "proper" welcome yet - so, welcome to the site! If you haven't already done so, please read the pink highlighted items on the home page under Open Me First. We ask this of all new members to make sure the site is a good fit.

I understand, too. Been there, still there.
Respect ... is appreciation of the separateness of the other person, of the ways in which he or she is unique.
-- Annie Gottlieb