Christmas without my kids.

[luise.volta]

Hard to get (for me) that rejection is about others...not me. Hugs...

[DixieDarling]

Hi Lisa, sorry for the hurt you're experiencing right now. I was curious if you had spoken with your children about how you feel?  I've read where AC will not care at all about how their Mother feels but I've also read where the AC (adult children) had no idea that their Mum was feeling this way because of their actions.
Many (not all) children want to connect with the parent they've not had growing up. And them being young adults it's probably easy for your ex to reel them in with new cars etc. Not saying it's right. Just that it is.
I really hope everything gets better fast for you.

[dedicatedmom]

Lisaaustralia, I definitely feel your pain and it is something that is often hard to live with. Our entire lives were dedicated to these children and to be pushed out of their lives unfairly is so painful. You can tell, I am sure, from the wonderful words of wisdom you are hearing from these awesome women, you will find comfort here. Stay with us, it helps to know there are those who understands. 

[Pen]

One day I got brave and decided to (gently) let my DS know how much it hurt to never hear from him about big stuff going on in his life unless he needed a favor. He huffed and puffed and accused me of trying to make him feel guilty. I won't go through that again.

[luise.volta]

Sounds like he did it to himself, P. Good for you for not saying, 'If the shoe fits, honey.' Hugs...

[DixieDarling]

Pen, I have a son who likes to turn it back on me like yours did. He's guilty that's why. IMO.
He knows he should be ashamed that he only calls when he needs something.

[Pen]

Yup, I agree. I can hear DIL in his words, and I can also hear him not totally buying what he's saying to me (and him knowing I'm not buying it either)...if that makes any sense 

Update: Since then, DS made sure to text me recently about something he'd had published. What a pleasant surprise!

[Whitney]

Lisa,
As Louise often says:  you can't make sense of the senseless...many of us on this site are in your place – done everything we could to be a good mom, only to be rejected by our kids who glorify their (fill-in-the-blank) dad who doesn't deserve their adoration.
May you find comfort in knowing that you are not alone in your pain...when I discovered this site about 10 months ago, I was blown away to find out that so many moms are hurting like I am...it has helped to find a kind of camaraderie here, a place where I can vent and cry without it being at the expense of friends and (2nd) hubby rolling their eyes with that look – "on no, there she goes again..."
Sometimes you just have to be on auto-pilot and keep putting one foot in front of the other – there ARE easier days ahead.