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The birthday card

Started by AnnaB, July 28, 2013, 01:16:40 AM

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AnnaB

I have finally decided NOT to acknowledge my abusive daughter's 40th  birthday...not to get even or be mean, but to show that I have cut emotional ties with her and she can no longer abuse ME. LONG STORY AND A LONG TIME COMING ( 10 years of escalating abuse from her ) .

She sat on my driveway and texted me a " hope you had a nice birthday" message....just that short, as she dropped off my GD.

My understanding is this, if she does NOT hear from me ever again in any way, shape or form, after groveling for the last 10 years, then there MIGHT  be SOME hope of hugging her again some day and hearing the words we long to hear, " I love you mom, ". But I have reached the conviction that I must stay strong. I must no longer grovel. At 67, never  too old to stop learning. I need to be set free once and for all. I have learned from my abusive oldest daughter, time to do this again. My son is good to me so that is a relief.

herbalescapes


nanaabby

It's a hard lesson for us moms to learn; yet, I believe it's a necessity.  I'm glad I found this site which helps confirm things I've already thought but felt guilty for feeling!

I've finally realized my DD is not worried about me one bit.  My past actions of running around like a chicken with my head cut off; doing this/that; handing out money, etc. may have done her an injustice.  She is an adult now~and it's time for her to make her way.  I raised her with the tools necessary to make it.  So it's her choice.  I refuse to let her keep drowning me.

Forge on AnnaB - enjoy YOUR life.