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All seems well after talking to my son !!!!

Started by Tessa, November 26, 2012, 03:58:39 PM

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Tessa

      I finally got brave and talked to my son about things on Sunday. He happened to be home alone for the afternoon.  I told him it was best that he did not bring his girl friend here when I was home alone.  I knew I had to do something after being on the phone with my husband crying because it is the weekend and my son and his girlfriend might stop by.
      I even had to tell my son that it was best that he came alone to our big Christmas gathering at my parents home this year  My sister told me that at Thanksgiving the tensions between us and my son and his girlfriend were very noticeable and it was not right to bring this into a family gathering.  I thought we were doing a good job of covering up our feelings.  But it helped that my sister said this !  I could pass on what she said to my son and not look like the bad person.  My sister said that it was okay to say that she said this when I talked to him !!
      My husband and I also agreed that we do not want his girlfriend at our little family Christmas.  It would be just asking for problems since it is just him and his sister.
     What a bunch of negative comments to tell him at one time, but it really helped when he said that he and his girlfriend were going Christmas shopping this weekend.  And it also helps that he seems to know his girlfriend is not trying to communicate with us.
       This is one of the hardest things I have ever had to do - but I did it !
       He was just here to pick up some stuff for the winter which I helped him load into his truck.  I knew he would be coming and wondered if he would after what I said yesterday.  He was as nice as could be and nothing was said about yesterday !
The last words I said to him was to have a good weekend and that I love him ! 
        I cried as he drove away - so thankful that all seems okay between us.
        Thank you to all you wise women who gave me such good advice earlier.  It helps so much to know that we are not alone.

luise.volta

Good for you! What a win! Nothing has changed...yet everything has, it seems to me. Congratulations for opting for self-respect. Sending love...
Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible. Dalai Lama