Cheating Hearts

[Smilesback@u]

This issue of cheating on girlfriends bothers me.  My DS has a new GF who I really like.  I feel compelled to tell her that he has been known to cheat on GF.  The purpose of telling her is that she has a heads-up.  I don't want to tell her and have the consequences of DS knowing I was the one.  Is ignorance bliss here or am I cruel?

[Begonia]

Smiles: Delicate situation.  There is always the odd chance that she is "the one" and if you like her you would not want this "warning" on your record to haunt you.  Who knows what they have already discussed?  I would let it be and enjoy her and expect the best.  Also, to establish trust on both sides I think it is wise to leave well enough alone and turn a blind eye to anything that goes on between them.  The older I get the more I realize that, in the broad sense of the word,  we are all unfaithful in some way or another...I don't believe the adage, "Once a cheater, always a cheater."  I have cheated and have chosen not to cheat, simple as that.  Every relationship is different.   

[Doe]

I wouldn't tell her but it's fodder for a good in depth conversation with DS if he is receptive.

[Lillycache]

Do not tell..... do not get involved.  Way too many times it's the messenger that gets killed... by everyone!!

[Didi.lost]

I agree don't say anything to her.  Then you won't be the bad guy.

[Pen]

Oh boy, I don't envy you there, Smiles. Hard call - but I agree w/everyone, don't get involved!!

[not like the movies]

there is a lesson here she might need to learn. and he might not cheat this time.

[lancaster lady]

No way Jose , not your call , even though your intentions are good .

[Lillycache]

Right now... new GF is in LOVE.  Girls in love think that they are the one and only woman who can change their beloved.  They just KNOW he will be different this time... and she will be the one to make him so.  To tell her this tidbit will not be taken well.  She will see it as YOU trying to put a wet blanket on this flame.  You will be perceived as meddling or trying to break them up for your own reasons..   What reasons you ask?  To keep your baby to yourself and not wanting him to grow up and have a life.   Your son will also not appreciate you telling his GF this tidbit.  Afterall, HE is in love now with this girl and at the moment  and I am sure HE believes he will be different this time.    This is something that will or will not play out in it's own time.  Either he will be faithful this time or he will not be.  They are going to have to deal with it.   You need to remain neutral, on the sidelines and silent.

[Smilesback@u]

thanks, I would rather give Love a Chance again.  peace

[luise.volta]

Let me chime in, too. We all have our lessons and we learn from experience. Passing on what we know to others isn't how it's done. Sending love...

[Keys Girl]

I sure wouldn't tell her......he may never speak to you again depending on what happens......and it may be that he won't cheat on HER, I think it's best for them to sort things out themselves. 

[Smilesback@u]

Thanks Keys me 2.  Mums the word and I believe in second, third and fourth chances...