Author Topic: Completely done with DIL/SM  (Read 14462 times)

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Offline Pooh

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Re: Completely done with DIL/SM
« Reply #30 on: May 22, 2012, 12:12:42 PM »
Good to see you Footloose!  I just read about your diving...that's so incredible.  I can't jump in the deep end without holding my nose and coming up spittering and sputtering, so I just laze around on a float.

I think it took me the longest to get that just because he is my Son and she is my DIL, I don't have to tolerate the behavior.  If he and she were an adult couple of friends that we hung out with, and they had started treating us this way and acting this way for years, I wouldn't have a problem not hanging out with them any longer and not being friends with them.  It wouldn't matter if we had been friends for 20 years, I wouldn't subject myself to that type of friendship.  I would hate it, but I wouldn't be sitting around going, "What did I do wrong?" I would move on.
We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us. -
Joseph Campbell

Offline Footloose

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Re: Completely done with DIL/SM
« Reply #31 on: May 22, 2012, 12:37:58 PM »
Yes, Pooh, leaving our adult children who mistreat us is hard but very doable!  Heck, i don't even like em anymore!  Like you, it's the baby grands i will miss terribly but I do have very fond memories with them and I am sure they will not forget me either.  And one day we will meet again.  BTW, u know at least one of my soon 2 b 4 GCs will be like me?!  He/she will drive my DIL nutz!  Can't wait.  LOL!!!  Karma!  LOL!!!
« Last Edit: May 23, 2012, 09:44:21 AM by elsieshaye »

Offline Pooh

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Re: Completely done with DIL/SM
« Reply #32 on: May 23, 2012, 06:25:37 AM »
Ha Ha Ha!
We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us. -
Joseph Campbell

Offline artlady

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Re: Completely done with DIL/SM
« Reply #33 on: May 23, 2012, 11:56:00 AM »
Wow now Footloose if they have one like me , being a right brain person ( art major) living in a house with a "everything in it 's place " sil and now dd , that poor child will drive them nuts. I did mine as i had things everywhere , never got in a stir about anything and not sure if i was on time or not  LOL

Offline enorton

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Re: Completely done with DIL/SM
« Reply #34 on: August 13, 2012, 06:49:17 PM »
I really don't think you can make comments until you have raised children to be the adults you want (wanted) them to be. You can be Super Mom but boys will be boys and follow the woman they are involved with. The lack of respect comes from the DIL's background and the power she has over the son. This is sooooo common as I read through the posts, what a shame!
« Last Edit: August 13, 2012, 06:56:42 PM by luise.volta »

Online luise.volta

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Re: Completely done with DIL/SM
« Reply #35 on: August 13, 2012, 06:59:40 PM »
E - As you can see, I modified your post a bit. If you don't understand why, please reread the "Forum Agreement" on our Home Page under Open Me First. We try to pass on making crude remarks. Thanks.
Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible. Dalai Lama

Offline Grammie

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Re: Completely done with DIL/SM
« Reply #36 on: August 15, 2012, 04:52:20 AM »
 Pooh you do not deserve this and neither does YS and FDIL.  So sorry!   My DM frequently recited what was fondly referred to as the "Family Curse".  She said "When you grow up I hope you have a kid just like you!"  Perhaps you should share my family "Curse"  with OS and DIL next time you see them! 
Change the changeable, accept the unchangeable, and remove yourself from the unacceptable.   
 ~ Denis Waitley ~

Offline Lillycache

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Re: Completely done with DIL/SM
« Reply #37 on: August 15, 2012, 05:58:52 AM »
I believe it's called Karma..  and no one escapes it. 

Offline Pooh

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Re: Completely done with DIL/SM
« Reply #38 on: August 15, 2012, 09:10:59 AM »
And I totally believe in Karma.  I believe the "spirit" you put out in the world is returned to you ten fold.  It may not be obvious at first, and it may not be from the same people that you gave to, but I do believe it.
We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us. -
Joseph Campbell

Offline herbalescapes

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Re: Completely done with DIL/SM
« Reply #39 on: August 19, 2012, 12:11:53 PM »
if i end up with a dil just like me, we'll butt heads, but be okay.  i fear having the dil my ILs always wanted me to be!

Offline Pooh

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Re: Completely done with DIL/SM
« Reply #40 on: August 20, 2012, 10:56:02 AM »
My FDIL and I are alot alike, which is why I think we do get along.  We butt heads, but we both get over it.
We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us. -
Joseph Campbell

Online luise.volta

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Re: Completely done with DIL/SM
« Reply #41 on: August 20, 2012, 11:02:12 AM »
How is she doing?
Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible. Dalai Lama

Offline Pooh

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Re: Completely done with DIL/SM
« Reply #42 on: August 20, 2012, 11:10:15 AM »
Healthwise and baby wise, she's doing great.  We just hit 21 weeks.  ;D  They are going to induce her December 21st (don't want her going into labor), so guess what I'm getting for Christmas?  They want to do her brain surgery the end of February, that will give her 8 weeks to recover from the C-Section.

Emotionally, she's had a very rough week.  Her Great Grandma passed away Thursday, so we went with her to the funeral Saturday where her biological father showed up.  She's not seen him since she was a baby so it was a rough time.  Then at 5:30 Sunday morning, her GM called to tell her that her GP was in the hospital.  This GP has been the father figure in her life and she's very close to him.  So I spent some time with her at the hospital.  He's doing better today but they are still trying to figure out what's wrong with him.

The good news that came out of it was that her Mom and SF drove up to the hospital, so I finally got to meet them.  Very nice people and me and DH ended up driving back to meet them for dinner last night with FDIL.  We had a good time and got along great.

So she's having a rough time right now, bless her heart.  She posted on my FB late last night that she had the best MIL in the world and was very grateful for all the support.  Very sweet.
We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us. -
Joseph Campbell

Online luise.volta

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Re: Completely done with DIL/SM
« Reply #43 on: August 20, 2012, 11:14:43 AM »
And she does, Pooh!  8)
Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible. Dalai Lama

Offline Pooh

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Re: Completely done with DIL/SM
« Reply #44 on: August 20, 2012, 11:25:22 AM »
Awww shucks, thank you
We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us. -
Joseph Campbell