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advice please-not sure how to proceed

Started by jill1963, May 02, 2012, 04:43:36 am

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Doe

Quote from: jill1963 on May 02, 2012, 04:43:36 am
All i want is to be able to see my GS & GD without the drama, all i want is for them to realise he is a little boy and that most off the stuff that he is doing is what little boys to, nothing malicious, and lastly all i want them to do is realise they have to treat both their children the same, it wasn't my GS's fault his DF wasn't around more when he was first growing up and that it was myself and ODD who were there for him more than his DF & DM.


Jill, I think this is a lot of detailed expectation for other people.   Maybe it's time to start looking around for some positives in his situation?   Thank God and his mother that he isn't an orphaned Lost Boy of Sundan or a crack baby.

I don't know if I actually wrote this here before, but I had a 7yo tell me after his dad divorced, that he figured it was all downhill after 6.  It was a poor druggie family.  I came right back and told him that wasn't true - that when he's an adult he can make his life whatever he wanted, he just need to be smart and get an education.  My point it that I think kids are stuck with the family they have but you can be the shining light that reminds him that his future can be bright.

jill1963

Doe,

It may be a lot of expectation for other people but they are fair expectations. Every child deserves a happy childhood.

No my GS is not a Lost boy of Sudan (or did you mean Sundan?) or a crack baby and my heart aches for any child that has to go through the hardships of the world that some countries have to tolerate, and i wish i could do something to help them all but that is impossible  :(
I do look at the positives generally and realise it is a situation i cannot control, but then my YDD or BF may do or say something that brings my wishes ( as quoted in your post) to the forefront again.
Yes my GS is stuck with the family he has got and i get what you are saying about being the shining light reminding him of a brighter future, and i will remind him of that, but here is also a wish for a more settled and pleasant present for my GS.
Jill x