My First Grandchild Arrived this evening! BITTERSWEET

[firelight]

I love your plans for a savings account for your new GS.  What a lovely gesture!  You sound like you're doing the very best you can already and that's all any of us can do.

Keep posting autumn woman.  Our thoughts are with you! 

[Beth 2011]

Hi Autumnwoman,

Congrats on being a GM.  This all sounds so familiar to me right down to the isolation from friends and family.  Know you will always love your DS but he is an AC and he makes his own decisions whether it is with or without DIL's influence.  I hope things turn around for you and your FOO.  Wishing you peace.

[firelight]

Oh Beth,

Such wise words......that was the harshest reality for me is to quit blaming the SIL for DD's poor choices.  That is one of the hardest things to face.  My DH still blames our SIL for everything that has happened and will not speak to him or even look at him.  He's still not allowed in our home.  To a point though, if it weren't for SIL, my DD wouldn't have been exposed to "certain things".  However, she did not run from it and made it part of her life for a very long time and it almost destroyed her.  In fact, it did destroy part of her.  DD even said to me once as I was in the process of blaming SIL for the situations...."It's not all his fault, I made my own decisions, Mom."  It's so hard to face that.  But face it we must because it is reality.  A painful, harsh reality.

[Beth 2011]

Firelight,

Your DH sounds like my DH,  he blames everything on our DIL.  He has just started accepting that DS is an AC and he makes his own decisions....that is after he tried reaching out to DS and DIL after our GB was born.  And when he and DS got into it on the phone....  I believe that was truly the first time he started seeing him in a new light.  He always said they were so much alike and I would tell him that they were to a degree but he didn't have his heart.  Wishing you and your DH peace. 

[autumnlady]

A ray of hope came my way on  Sunday evening when I received a text from my OS to come and meet my GS!  I was EXTACTIC!  I brought some flowers because I only had a 30 minute window.  I arrived at the hospital and was met by my OS, I gave him a kiss and we moved forward.  The visit was amazing and my GS is beyond words.  My heart is so filled with love that I can't breathe.  I was there for 2 hours, and we all did some talking which I think helped, but I would do anything to be with my GS.  So I am going to take baby steps and see what develops.  The main thing is that my OS told me he didn't want his son to miss knowing his grandmother.  I am so happy and blessed.  I know things could go away again, but I have to be positive and again don't expect anything but take what I am given.

I want to thank everyone of you ladies for your support and kindness.  This is the most emotional thing that I have ever been through and I hope that I can continue to be a part of my GS life but as we all know I have to be very careful.  My OS and DIL was very nice to me and I to them.  Life is just too short for all this craziness and hurtfulness that happens in life.  I hope that everyone will have progress in a positive way because I for one NEVER thought this would happen and I was proved so very wrong. Sending hugs to everyone!

[Pen]

That's wonderful news! I think your plan to 'take baby steps and see what develops' is a good one. Pushing too hard right now may scare them off (like skittish colts, lol.) Best wishes and congratulations (again)!

[nikncon]

So happy for you.One day at a time.Like you said baby steps.Congratulations on your gs.Enjoy all the moments that you will have with him.And I' m sure that there will be many.

[autumnlady]

Thanks Pen and Nikncon!  I am very happy and will cherish every moment I get to spend with my GS.  I will keep you all posted.  Sending hugs!

[firelight]

How very exciting!  I couldn't be happier for you, autumn!  I love to hear news like this. 

Isn't it the coolest seeing that GC for the first time?!  I practically had to be scraped off the ground with a putty knife I was so floored when my GD came along.  I was grandbaby drunk!  I know you must be as well and loving every minute of it. 

I hope things continue to move in the right direction !  Enjoy.   

[Pooh]

Great news!  Congrats!

[Nana]

Dear AL:

Congratulations for your new grandchild.   It was indeed a wonderful, unbelievable surprise.... After all, dil and son have a good heart.  Baby steps, as you said.  Try to be very cautious and prudent.  More good things coming, you''ll see.  Think positive. 

God Bless You and Your Family

Love

[artlady]

So happy to hear that you saw the baby and things seem to be improving. I jsut had my first grandchild 6 weeks ago and it has certainly not been how I thought it would be , I do  hope things turn around and sil sees there are gp who care and will help in anyway they need. Good luck and bright days ahead.

[autumnlady]

Artlady - I too will hope that things turn around for you.  Your GC is a precious gift.  I have not seen my GS again yet, but I have been very sick with a stupid cold, but I'm on the mend.  I did send a text to my OS about 5 days after I saw my GS and after 2 days he responded nicely, so again baby steps.  I have NO expectations so again no disappointments...I keep repeating this so I will believe it!  LOL

Nana - I know you have grandchildren and I have read some of your posts and they have been very inspirational to me.  I am trying to change my life and live my example and quit blaming other people and take responsibility for my actions because the only person I can change is ME!  I am making good progress and will continue to do so with all you wonderful ladies on this site I have a great support system.

Thanks again for everything...we will see how things develop as time goes on! 

[autumnwoman]

Well my GS is 3 weeks old today.  I did see him again last Tuesday night.  I sent a text to my OS on Monday afternoon and received a response on Tuesday afternoon stating I could come over that evening at 7pm.  Of course I accepted.  I was able to feed him and just breathe in the scent that only a new baby has and it's amazing.  The visit went well we did not bring up the past so I am again hoping that we continue to move forward.  I only stayed an hour and left thanking them both. Of course I would love to see my GS every week but I don't want to push too hard so I am giving it about 2 weeks between visits as not to crowd them.  I figure if they have an issue they will let me know.  Sending thanks again to everyone...I'm happy for the first time in a LONG TIME, but I am taking it slow.  Thanks for listening, I hope everyone is doing well tonight. 

[nikncon]

So happy for you Autumn.I'm sure that things will keep getting better with every visit.One day at a time.Enjoy!