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Estranged FS (first son)

Started by ycequeen57, November 29, 2011, 10:24:55 AM

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ycequeen57

December 19, 2011, 08:37:56 AM #15
Thank you all for the support.  I just needed to know that I wasn't a bad mother because I feel this way.  I will continue to send cards.  And you are right, be prepared for him not to acknowledge anything I send.  At least I know i am sending something.  Love to all.  And thanks again!  ~Yce

Pooh

December 19, 2011, 09:00:12 AM #16
Good to hear from you again ycequeen!
We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us. -
Joseph Campbell

lisafox41

December 19, 2011, 02:45:48 PM #17
I am going through the same with my DD. I periodically text her and talk to her occasionally. I want to have no regrets, and despite it all, I want her to know she is loved. But like the others, no more gifts.
Relationships have to go both ways...she knows I am here for her. I say take the gift money and spend it on someone who will appreciate it (yourself maybe?).

ycequeen57

December 20, 2011, 06:04:47 AM #18
We do suffer a lot as parents.  We want what is best for our children.  Not sending gifts to them goes against the grain, but sometimes that has to take the form of tough love.  I was reminded by someone that it seemed that I was trying to make FS feel guilty about not responding to me even when we did talk.  He also said that does nothing but increase the chasm.  I am better off by not expecting anything and accept that he loves me in his own way and I should be grateful that at least he picks up the phone or texts me sometimes.  There are many other mothers who would be happy with just the acknowledgement.  And still others that feel hate from their offspring.  I am not as bad off as I thought.  My heart goes out to those loving mothers who can't connect at all with their children.  I have two other loving children that fill my heart.  ~Yce

Happy Holidays to All!
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