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No jealousy, no tantrums, just sadness

Started by amflautist, October 24, 2011, 10:07:32 AM

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lancaster lady

Hubble bubble toil and trouble ..........mwahahaha..... ......charging my broomstick as we speak........ see you there my lovelies......    mwahahaha ........!!

herbalescapes

For a super-scary Halloween thought, consider that if you think your DS married a woman with a FOO totally unlike you and yours, it just might be that after you take away superficial differences, the problems arise because you are so much alike.....

Pen

Yikes!  ;D

As my grandma used to say, "One of us should be insulted but I'm not sure who." My poor DS's ILs would be shocked to think they were like us!
Respect ... is appreciation of the separateness of the other person, of the ways in which he or she is unique.
-- Annie Gottlieb

Pooh

Nah, because if that was true, my DIL would like me!  :D
We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us. -
Joseph Campbell

amflautist

Update.  I am reading, and taking in, all your advice, particularly about not putting pressure on DS and DIL to stay the second night.  The problem I have been mulling over in my head was how to greet DIL, how to make her feel welcome, without accruing yet another notch in her belt.  (She has been able to find fault with everything DH and I have ever done.  She has accused us of loving our daughter more than our son.  She has faulted me for not bussing her real estate agent on both cheeks!  Even though we had not yet been introduced!) 

But today I figured it out...   I NEVER watch Oprah.  So what was it that made me stop the channel surfing while I was slurping my noontime soup in front of the TV?  I attached myself to Oprah's Life Class #18 [http://www.oprah.com/oprahs-lifeclass/Lesson-18-Do-Your-Eyes-Light-Up-When-Your-Child-Walks-in-the-Room], and I learned that what everyone wants is validation.  That gave me the biggest AHA of my young life.  I CAN make DIL feel comfortable during her hurried visit here.  And I will.

Doe

Thanks for passing that along!  It's a good reminder!

When DIL and DS visited, DIL went missing after one of their fights right before they were supposed to leave town.  I continued getting things together for them to take on the road and when she came in, I reflexively hugged her and said, "Oh good you're back!" and started describing some things I did.  DS told me later that that blew her away, the fact that I welcomed her back in the house.

Course, that was then.