Will things ever get better?

[Ruth]

And I love you also, L Lady.

[Depressedmom]

Dear Ruth,
Thank you for sharing that with me.  It is comforting to know that there are people  out there  that will take the time  share their wisdom with someone others like me.  I did not have the greatest childhood either but I certantly  wanted a great childhood for my boys.  It is just heartbreaking that we have to be treated like this.  I know I have to go on and live, work, paybills  and I do. But sometimes I do get very depressed.   However, will not have any  dealings  with my OS again. When we got along we would talk and have some things in common.  But it has been at his whim.  Because of the latest fight, now when  he sees me,  he will give me a cold hello, but nothing else.   Well so be it.  He is  still agry at me because he thought I was not taking him seriously and I was.  He has no clue that I am angry at him because of the way he spoke to me.  I think, life is short, why does this have to be? 

[Ruth]

Change your name, precious one.  You don't have to be a depressed mom.  There's a whole beautiful world outside your window, and you can just begin to explore and enjoy your life like a child.  As Luise says, you were a whole person before you were a mother.  You had a very hard job description to fulfill.  It took a toll on your, and it took a long time to finish it.  It doesn't look so good right now, I know.  It looks like you didn't follow the instructions and some of the pieces are missing.  But the problem is that we're all just human beings trying to build other human beings, and it can be too hard, because sometimes you don't have the right tool for the job, sometimes you don't understand the instructions, sometimes the raw material just won't cooperate at all!   And it looks a mess, but step away from it, and like looking at a great oil painting, sometimes from a distance it looks much better.  You are done with this laborious task now, and try and start redirecting your thinking away from just mom stuff.  Find a volunteer project that you really believe in and start giving yourself there. 

[sesamejane]

Oh Ruth!  What a fine idea, and I agree.  DM definitely change your name - what would you like to affirm? 

Lovingmom       Gettingbettermom       Blessedmom      MomwithWWfriends       Belovedmom       Righteousmom 

[Ruth]

I adore you Sesame Jane, You've been through so much but you are not a cry baby. 

[sesamejane]

Aw Ruth, I really treasure your saying that.  I hope not to be a whiner or crybaby.  I don't feel very well sometimes, like lately,but you and the other women on this site help me so much.  thank you 

[Keys Girl]

Change your name, precious one.  You don't have to be a depressed mom.  There's a whole beautiful world outside your window, and you can just begin to explore and enjoy your life like a child.  As Luise says, you were a whole person before you were a mother.  You had a very hard job description to fulfill.  It took a toll on your, and it took a long time to finish it.  It doesn't look so good right now, I know.  It looks like you didn't follow the instructions and some of the pieces are missing.  But the problem is that we're all just human beings trying to build other human beings, and it can be too hard, because sometimes you don't have the right tool for the job, sometimes you don't understand the instructions, sometimes the raw material just won't cooperate at all!   And it looks a mess, but step away from it, and like looking at a great oil painting, sometimes from a distance it looks much better.  You are done with this laborious task now, and try and start redirecting your thinking away from just mom stuff.  Find a volunteer project that you really believe in and start giving yourself there.

Ruth, that post was wonderful.  My internet has been cutting out for the last little while so I couldn't post this earlier.  I have to say that it's one of the best posts I've ever read here.  Thank you, thank you.

KG

[Doe]

Me, too, Ruth.  (see thumbs up)

[bdwell1904]

DH is 41 and Brother is 44. DH was raised by his mom and B was raised by their dad. Never really had much interaction until their teens. To this day they have a couple of good months then B will get mad about something and not speak to us for ages. We carry on with our lives, we know this is how he is and that will never change. He lives in a world of imagined hurts not reality, we just refuse to live there with him.