Locked out

[gardenfairy]

Well, still no contact with my DD, however an email was sent out to all telling us they had to put their oldest cat down.   I know this was really hard for my DD, as the cat was 19, and he was her first.    I sent an email expressing my sympathy to them all, maybe this was a small step in the right direction since I was included in the email.  One can only hope.

[Pooh]

I think that was a positive that she included you, and a return email expressing your sympathy was appropriate.  I would leave it at that and maybe you will hear from her again.  There is always hope!

[gardenfairy]

Things are moving slowly (i hope) in a good direction.  I had a text from my DD to say she would meet with me, to return my computer, at the end she said love ... my heart just jumped with that.   It has been a long time since she has said/typed the love word, haven't heard anything since, however, I am willing to wait and take the little things as they come.    Hope everyone will have a great day.

[Pooh]

That's great progress gardenfairy!  I know it's hard for us to be patient, but you are doing a great job!

[Begonia]

Yea....hold on to this positive step.  For now the seas are calm and delight in that you have remained strong.  Keep on and keep posting!

About a year ago when there was a rocky patch with DD (I should say yet another rocky patch), I was just at my wits end.  So I called her father (my X), whom I have remained fairly close friends with over all these years.  I just needed to vent and it did help.  I mentioned to my DD later that her dad had been supportive and that was nice.  She nearly went through the roof (of the sunroof of her car) with her rant at me.  For once I was not going to take it and I raised my voice enough to be heard and told her "Too bad! When I don't hear from you and you don't answer my calls I get very worried, so your dad helped me through that.  I have nobody to talk to so I would do it again and I really don't care if you have a fit or not."  Amazingly, she calmed right down. 

I think our AC want to keep us under their control and that worked with me for a long time but no more.  She had played us against each other for a long time...and that is pretty natural after a divorce, but hey...the divorce was in the 70s .  That was the beginning of me realizing I will live my life and speak to whomever I need to speak to.  Really, did she think I was going to buy in to her keeping me silent about her antics?  Didn't work.  But, things have been quite fragile ever since then between us and she really distanced herself from me.  Sorry about that but the game was up. 

On the other hand, I would never dream of calling AC MIL about anything, as both of the MIL are not well mentally.  Yet my DS spends a lot of time with MIL helping, etc. (FIL is in prison for countless felony DUIs).  A whole other story.