Speech

[AnonymousDIL]

My only advice is to not under any circumstances openly thank Bridesmaids X Y and Z for their hardwork and exclude Bridesmaid A. You can get away with thanking G-ma or Mom for their hardwork without offending anyone because they aren't on "equal level" with the bridesmaids. All the bridesmaids are on the same footing though. If you want to thank Bridesmaids X Y and Z for helping you and exclude Bridesmaid A, just don't do it publicly. There's nothing wrong with going "Hey, Bridesmaid X. Thanks so much for your help assembling the favors." but don't put a spotlight on it.

[SassyDI]

It is tricky and I am darn if I do darn if I don't.  My Grandma will be very hurt if I don't say something including her.  And my sister isn't going to thank everyone I am dong that on her behalf.  Does this sound good.

On behalf of my mom, Grandma bridal party and my sister I would like to thank you all for coming.  By the way for those of you who don't know my name is SassyDI and I am the older sister of sister.  I would like to take a moment to introduce to the mother's and Grandm's of the bride and groom.  My mom________  and granma__________ and BIL mom___________ Fbil grandma_________.  I would also like to take a moment to introduce you to rest of the bridesmaids.(then list them and maybe how they know the bride)

My only advice is to not under any circumstances openly thank Bridesmaids X Y and Z for their hardwork and exclude Bridesmaid A. You can get away with thanking G-ma or Mom for their hardwork without offending anyone because they aren't on "equal level" with the bridesmaids. All the bridesmaids are on the same footing though. If you want to thank Bridesmaids X Y and Z for helping you and exclude Bridesmaid A, just don't do it publicly. There's nothing wrong with going "Hey, Bridesmaid X. Thanks so much for your help assembling the favors." but don't put a spotlight on it.

And if you read my speech above I already did that.

[holliberri]

Sassy, your mock-up speech was fine, and it accomplishes what everyone has said.

If you really feel that someone needs an extra special thank you, tell them that personally, away from the crowd, without alluding to the unparticipative bridesmaid in the process.

[AnonymousDIL]

I must have a different view of the word "credit." All I saw in your speech (which IS very nicely worded. kudos!) was introducing the parties not saying thank you to them for all their hard work in helping you pull it all together which is "credit" in my mind.

[willingtohelp]

To be totally formal, the way this would be handled is that those who are paying are considered to be hosting the shower and would be listed on the invitation as hostesses.  That clarifies for people attending who they need to find and thank for their hospitality.  That being said, people can contribute in a number of ways, so don't forget to thank the person who, while not contributing financially, stayed up till 2 am stuffing goodie bags. 

Outside of the invitation, I've also seen at some showers where people have put cards in front of the food that say "X's Spinach Dip" and "T's Cranberry Punch" which is both a more homey way of describing the food and gives credit to the person who brought the dish.  In a speech, there are plenty of ways to subtly thank people who helped without calling attention to those who didn't.  So grab your glass of champagne or sparkling cider...

*clink clink clink of the glass*  Everyone, I'd like to thank you for coming to Bride's Name's shower.  It's so wonderful be able to gather together to celebrate such a joyous occasion.  And the festivities wouldn't have happened without the hard work of so many people.  Our wonderful spread was made by my mom and grandma *polite applause*, Bridesmaid one and two spent hours on the gorgeous center pieces, thank people in no more than 10 words per thanks here...I'm sure I'm forgetting someone, there's just so many people who have wanted to help make this day special for Bride's Name.  And that's because Bride's Name is so special to all of us.  So let's all raise our glass to Bride's Name. 

I do understand the comment that those who have helped should be thanked and that those who haven't shouldn't be.  But I'm also of the opinion that not every kid who plays TBall should get a trophy and that only kids who turn in their homework and know the correct answers for the test should get A's. 

[SassyDI]

LOL thanks the shower is over and I lucky me did not have to say a word DSis did the thanking and introductions.  So now onto the speech for the wedding which I can stress about public speaking not hurting anyone.