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Heartbreak ahead

Started by 2chickiebaby, November 16, 2009, 08:24:46 am

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Don't you wish sometimes that someone would have told you that there was heartbreak ahead?  I do but I wonder if I would have believed them?  I honestly don't think I would have.

Would you have believed someone if they had said that to you before your son married? 


Gosh, I hope all young women aren't like mine and your DILs.  I can't imagine being so self centered that you have to resort to acting like ours do.

I've looked again at some of the MIL hate sites...there is a huge business out there for hating somebody's mother.  These people are making a killing.  I shouldn't look at them; they really can be over the top brutal.

Most of them will throw their MIL out for the slightest thing.  Never their own mother, though.....their mothers are perfect and never like DH's mean mother. 

"they don't fix the right meals, cater to their other kids, cater too much to her DH, don't call their kids, call their kids too much, don't come over, come over too much, manipulative, needy, cry too much, laugh too much, don't laugh enough, don't ever cry, say stupid  things, don't understand jokes, joke around too much, emotional, not emotional enough, and on and on and on....."

I don't get it   We must be very powerful people.  All this from one little Momma?  Boy Hydie!! (A Southern term)  I have more if anyone is interested!!   


Thankfully, all young women aren't like that.  And all MIL's aren't like the stereotypes we see, either.

Thank goodness, there are still good people out there - DIL's and MIL's!!! 

Just wish we all had the good fortune to have them in our lives!


Chickie and Anna,
You can sure add my dil to this category. I would have never ever believed this could or would happen in our family but HERE WE ARE ! as dysfunctional as they come .

I hope it's ok if I add to your post but I just can't resist.

she's too loud/ she was so quiet that she caused tension
she's too nosey/ she never asks anything so she ,obviously, doesn't care about us
she didn't even speak to me / she smothers me so much
she never comes over/ she comes over way too much
she didn't act like she wanted to babysit / she is trying to take over my children
and so on and on and on...... " I can't believe it "


Have at it, Mom......the list could wrap around the world and back.  I'm sure that all of us who have encountered this could add to the list too. 

I keep thinking about one of son's friends whose wife said, "it's either me or her".  He did say that he wishes his children had a grandmother to love them.  They did but he kicked her out.  Poor thing!



In regards to wishing there had been a Grandmother to love them; there again, we are not allowed to be a part of their lives but sadly as the children grow up and question all this... it's..... " Your Grandparents, on your Dads side, didn't want anything to do with you  or never cared about you".  Then what ? We take the hit again.


with us, Mom...the dil does come to Thanksgiving (or she has in the past) but she must really hate it because she makes the whole place fall like a thud.

The F.U.N. or any humor of any kind OR any lively discussions about the world stage OR anything to do with the past, like when the boys were little OR really anything of any interest is off limits. Our IQ's have to be put in the closet.

I'm sure she feels intimidated a bit because she just found out what "December 7, nineteen hundred forty one,  a date which will live in infamy"... was all about.  Not that I was born then but we tried to instill history in out sons head about the past.   They love it. 

She is very bright in other ways, though.  It's just nothing very interesting.  She never shares anything about herself or her completely nutty faaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaamily.  They're as nutty as mine were but they are still hanging around and being catered to. 

I'm really being bad this evening.  My apologies.  Sometimes if I don't complain, there's just nothing left.  ;D


Well, Phooey! My DIL, our Webmaster's wife, is absolutely wonderful but we live in Washington state and they live in Hawaii. Think they'll drop over for Thanksgiving dinner? I had the fantasy that DH was well and we slipped over and surprised them with a call on Thanksgiving Day, "Hey, our place or yours?"

We have an extended family of ten "kids" who call us Mom and Dad. Not one of them is related to DH and only one is related to me. But what a "heart-connection!" They live in our town, Seattle, E. WA, New Mexico and Hawaii.  Lots to be thankful for :)

Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible. Dalai Lama


Your DIL is wonderful to you, Luise....that makes the difference.   People who love you can be on another planet and it's okay because there is no sense of the separation.

I know you'll enjoy your friends.