Author Topic: What ever happened to...?  (Read 5575 times)

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Offline jill

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Re: What ever happened to...?
« Reply #15 on: April 21, 2011, 06:19:36 PM »
HappyDays,
I hope you stay, everybody's input is important on this forum.  You have shown great strength in deciding to cut off your son, it must have been the most difficult thing you have ever done.  I am sure there are some people here who have thought of doing the same thing.  Keep posting....Jill

Tara

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Re: What ever happened to...?
« Reply #16 on: April 21, 2011, 09:47:07 PM »
Hey HD,

I hate to see you go.   Why don't you try a little longer.  I feel a connection with you and would like to see that develop.
Also, can you pls explain 'no contact' if you feel comfortable doing that?


SunnyDays09

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Re: What ever happened to...?
« Reply #17 on: April 22, 2011, 08:03:01 AM »
I don't get it Happy. What am I missing here? Why would you leave? I don't know what you refer to on the "No contact." Everyone here is able to contact everyone via posts...and for now the Personal Messaging is operating. When a person is someone I don't want posting...they are deleted as members. What's us?

Because it hurts over and over and in order to stop the hurt I project my feelings in my posts.  Knee jerk reaction/reply: "cut em loose"  "don't call them back", etc.  This isn't helpful advice and I know it.  I used to hide behind funny, but it aint anymore--the nerve is exposed.   
  Can you imagine the new poster coming on board to ask: "What can I do, my mil isn't feel well and I want to help her"  and I reply "NO MORE CONTACT"  She isn't worth it!!!  Ok.  Extreme.   Kind of comical and I would be the first to giggle at the humor here - but what the heck is behind it?  When will I be able to just let it go?

( The feelings behind the  NO CONTACT is that there isn't a permanent thread.  Like under Grab Bag, so to speak.  For that ONE person---me---that has decided to have no contact.  I really can't give constructive advice to those hurting.  KWIM?  I could be the lonely troll mil in the NO CONTACT thread that all the dils avoid like the plague.  Even the old friends I found thru here have contact with their kids/families after years of none.  As happy as I am for that, there is a feeling of "how wonderful for her/them", there is also OH, NO!  I am a monsterinlaw)
 
Just reading this they will come to discover that there is a human being on this globe that would reconsider NC  in a heartbeat and walk thru fire to avoid it. ( I threw his baby pix away.  But there is one I forgot about in a dresser stored downstairs and I found it a couple weeks ago--my God he was an adorable little baby.  What misfired?)  So that's what THAT'S all about with me for now. 

Whew!  Wow. Didn't know that was down in there.  Shoosh.  In the book I have latched on to lately:  "You Can Heal Your Life" by Louise L. Hay there is a section I keep avoiding:  Exercise:  Forgiveness and I don't know why. 

Youse are overwhelming me here and from my entire heart (top and bottom), I thank and hug each one of you.  Feels wonderful, it does.  And maybe I was too quick to NC you all - see?  It IS me!! lol. 

Now,  I so want to find out about LL's meds!!!  Just don't ask me for mil/dil advice.   ;D

Thank you again. 


Offline Rose799

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Re: What ever happened to...?
« Reply #18 on: April 22, 2011, 08:22:16 AM »
I think many of us understand, Happy.   It's survival.  It's hard to recover after having every little piece of our heart broken.  Maybe you just need to add a warning label to your posts, like they do on cigarettes & alcohol. : )

Offline Rose799

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Re: What ever happened to...?
« Reply #19 on: April 22, 2011, 08:58:46 AM »
I listened to Dr. Coleman's seminar last night.  He said mothers have a harder time disconnecting from estrangements, as we're hard wired to our dc, they think in order to help the species survive.   


Offline Rose799

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Re: What ever happened to...?
« Reply #20 on: April 22, 2011, 09:08:19 AM »
I think many of us understand, Happy.   It's survival.  It's hard to recover after having every little piece of our heart broken.  Maybe you just need to add a warning label to your posts, like they do on cigarettes & alcohol. : )

I meant "disclosure," not warning... 

Sassy

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Re: What ever happened to...?
« Reply #21 on: April 22, 2011, 10:43:02 AM »
I remember you happydays!   I just got through an awful tax season by having "when this is over done, I'll have time to check in with the wise women" as the light at the end of my tunnel.   I wonder if Rose's idea can be incorporated into a smartly funny signature line....   

You don't have to cut us off entirely.  Maybe just give us a time out?  :P

Offline lancaster lady

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Re: What ever happened to...?
« Reply #22 on: April 22, 2011, 10:45:56 AM »
FYI :
I have sent a list of my meds to Dr Happy .....c'mon now where's that smile ???

SunnyDays09

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Re: What ever happened to...?
« Reply #23 on: April 22, 2011, 11:49:06 AM »
I have replied LL, hope ya got some time to read it all.   ;)

Gonna have to check out Dr. Coleman and  I do like the idea of a "disclaimer" in the siggy !! :)   (Although me thinks you had it right with warning heehee). 

Looks I'm the grab bag lady!!  I'll stay in that category, or maybe venture into the Internet and post some informational tidbit on a health topic. 

Luise, Rose, Tara, Jill, Pooh, Lancaster lady, Sassy, Holly, pam and all Thank You so very much.  Just don't let me loose on a noob, for awhile.   :-X


Offline Rose799

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Re: What ever happened to...?
« Reply #24 on: April 22, 2011, 01:31:05 PM »
I do like the idea of a "disclaimer" in the siggy !! :) 

Bet you could get some help with that if you throw in a bath bomb... : )

Offline lancaster lady

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Re: What ever happened to...?
« Reply #25 on: April 22, 2011, 01:48:07 PM »
lololol:    these bath bombs keep surfacing ...I have a basket full in my bathroom ....one at a time ladies ..!

Offline luise.volta

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Re: What ever happened to...?
« Reply #26 on: April 22, 2011, 01:55:23 PM »
So glad you are reconsidering, H!. :-) We don't have to answer any posts we don't want to or comment on any posts that we don't find supportive. We're all pretty free here. All that's asked is that what we write is respectful. We have lots and lots of members who read posts but don't post, themselves. Whatever works!
« Last Edit: April 22, 2011, 08:43:23 PM by luise.volta »
Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible. Dalai Lama

SunnyDays09

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Re: What ever happened to...?
« Reply #27 on: April 22, 2011, 08:38:44 PM »
Awww thanks Luise.  You are wonderful. 

Rose!  rofl!!!

Offline Sheen

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Re: What ever happened to...?
« Reply #28 on: April 23, 2011, 12:45:58 AM »
Hi Happy
I also hope you don't leave the forum.  Like you if there was a category for the no contact, I would be sitting right next to you as I have had no contact with my son going on seven years as well.  Perhaps we can't get much advice on our own situations but I bet we can offer some relating to what led up to our positions.
So hang out in the  forum, I will share my popcorn with you lol.

Hope

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Re: What ever happened to...?
« Reply #29 on: April 23, 2011, 03:57:02 AM »
Happy,
So glad you reconsidered.  We need you!
Hugs, Hope