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Spring has Sprung

Started by kathleen, March 26, 2011, 04:13:59 PM

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Pen

FAFE, you're a good grandma and I'm sure your GS knows it. He's lucky to have you. One day your DS will realize that as well.
Respect ... is appreciation of the separateness of the other person, of the ways in which he or she is unique.
-- Annie Gottlieb

kathleen

My story of my friend who has died has been called into question as untrue, as if I have used it abusively and egotistically on this forum to "plot" a "book," to quote the email from the member of this forum.  I have no intention to write a book on this or any other topic on this forum.  If I did, I would openly ask for research in a professional manner, exposing true motives.

The story of my friend "C," not her real initial, is totally true, except I have left out certain more extreme details of her daughter's treatment of her, which included: false accusations of abuse; accusations of lying and telling untrue stories; and many more details.  I have absolutely no intent nor any action to hurt C's daughter.  The time has passed except for anything but for those of us left to learn, learn from this experience of an alienated mother and daughter.  If the accusations against my friend "C: had been true, her daughter would not be a) arranging a big memorial for her, and b) contacting me and other friends for comfort at this stage.

My story of "C" was written at a time of extreme anguish, the day after learning she had died January 10, news I dreaded yet expected, thinking, as I mostly have found here, that I would receive love and support.  It is quite true I didn't check my "time line," although I didn't realize there was one at the time to defend, to explain fully how my friend's daughter could have gotten in touch with me via a letter from 2008.
(This is how false accusations go; we must re-visit, document, and record every single detail.)  I assumed from the letter sent by C's daughter that that is when and how she got my new address, however, my long friendship with C included many, many letters, cards; she was not an emailer; and certainly I would have sent a change of address when I came here that would have been among C's possessions. But now, re-reading the letter from her daughter, I see that my assumption was wrong and that her daughter was not saying at all that she had my address necessarily from 2008, only that from that letter she extrapolated that C and I had been deep friends. I attempted numerous times since I moved into my new house to get in personal touch with my friend, only always to learn she was no longer emailing, had a cell phone, or was working any longer.  I made numerous attempts even up to the last three months.

C was a real person, but I changed her initial because I do not want to identify in any way anything that could possibly hurt her daughter now, or her granddaughter.  The email I received stated in a very derogatory way that I made up a 'story.'  That is so incredibly disrespectful that I have to say it in writing, partly to remain true to my dear friend who is gone.

There are persons on this forum who are policing what is said for the express purpose to find fault and defects, and surely they will, but this is not the spirit or intent of this forum as I understand it. 

This is all I have to say in response to that portion of the email I received, accusing me of deception on this forum.  It's been an appalling experience, and my dear lost friend would be equally appalled.  I will be attending her memorial this Saturday and will try to report what has happened to her granddaughter, to those of you who have expressed such love, sharing, and caring, for which I thank you. 

I would never possibly do anything to denigrate my dear friend. This innuendo has added to my grief, and was completely unsupportive in a way I could not imagine inflicting on someone else.  If the writer expected to achieve personal satisfaction via her actions, she has achieved it.

Kathleen


jill

Dear Kathleen,
I cannot believe that someone would think you made up this very sad story.  It is easy to tell you loved your friend very much, and I am sure all of us here are very grateful for your sharing this with us.  I always get a lot from your posts, Kathleen, and look forward to reading many more.
Best wishes..........................Jill

luise.volta

I am placing this response on two threads.

There has been some question as to whether it was OK for Kathleen to post that she has been told via Personal Message that not one member but perhaps many, dislike her presentation(s).

My take is that she brought it up online because she does not know how to address those others who seem to back her accuser, if they exist. She can't PM them. She doesn't know who they are.

I have tried to have the PM option removed from WWU. Kirk says it can't be done. It is too deep in the software. I see no use for it unless members want to exchange email addresses to create expanded relationships and they could do that through me, if they were both in agreement. PMs aren't needed to contact me. That can be done via "Report to Moderator."

Once again, I want to say that if you don't like a thread, doubt its authenticity, don't like a post or a poster...please move on to other subjects. There are plenty to choose from.

I have terminated members who used PMs for subterfuge, overt attack and/or back stabbing. Also, some members have apparently found it to be entertaining to turn members against each other via PM and start wars. Not on my dime.

My "dime" is about support, advocacy, being heard and acknowledged and at times it is about healing. If it's a Pollyanna site to some, so be it.

Does anyone think I may be using WWU content for the book that I one day think I might write? If so, please blast me about that on your way out.

Come on you guys...lighten up!

Sending love, always...
Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible. Dalai Lama

luise.volta

Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible. Dalai Lama

kathleen

It is funny Luise, but you know what?  Hub came home and checked it out and swears he saw brown log tracks creeping toward our woods in what's left of the snow.

Kathleen

luise.volta

Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible. Dalai Lama

luise.volta

March 30, 2011, 06:35:40 PM #22 Last Edit: March 30, 2011, 06:37:49 PM by luise.volta
I tried to take this topic out of "Open Me First, give it a new title and put in in Grab bag but I made a big mes of it. Sorry.
Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible. Dalai Lama