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Kinda sad

Started by FAFE, February 14, 2011, 10:14:31 am

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Nana

Fafe

Hi, yes the gest of your post is the indifference of the other grandparents towards the baby.  It is so sad, but dont worry about it.  You seem very loving and that is a blessing for your daughter and sil.  Good they have you. 

Sending love
Love is not love Which alters when it alteration finds, Or bends with the remover to remove:
Shakespeare

FAFE

Thanks, Nana for your kind words.  Yes, they are missing out.  I am not going to say that they are totally not there for the baby, they have given the parents a good amt of money for formula and diapers, etc., but they are totally not as excited as I am!  I told my DH that I was going to have my SS check sent directly to the baby!  She is 5 months old today!!! 

Nana

So five months....congrats.  And you will enjoy, 6, 7. 8 and so on.  My youngest gd (have 3) will be 2 months on the 19th.  I cannot enjoy her much cause she cries a lot....but I love her with all my heart.  When she is not crying she is a sweetie pie.

Probably their other gp's are not so intense (or passionate) as we are lol.
Love
Love is not love Which alters when it alteration finds, Or bends with the remover to remove:
Shakespeare

L

That was a really sweet thing you did.  But I wouldn't mention anything about his parents any more.  It might make the SIL feel worse.  Obviously there is big time family dysfunction there.  It may hurt him even though you are trying to help.  Maybe he wants to cut ties with his mom, you never know.   I'm sure he is grateful you will love this new baby with all your heart since his mom doesn't seem to have much of a heart. :(    Congrats on your new grandbaby! :)

FAFE

Oh, no, SIL loves his family.  They are just polar opposites from us.  I have 4 sisters, 2 brothers and a multiple nieces and nephews, plus the grand ones now.  We have always had big family get to gethers, etc.  His mom and dad are very low keyed.  He has 2 brothers and their relationships are wacky! DD and SIL have been married for 14 years and (his parents) have never come to anything we have invited them to.  They have never invited us to anything except for the dedication of GD when she was born.  They had it at the church they attend.  They're always cordial, but just not like us!  I have asked my DD and SIL, now that they have the baby to please not have two birthday parties, etc.  Have one, invite anyone who's interested in coming and call it a day. 

L

Oh, that's good his parents are not to bad, just not super-friendly.  I didn't read past your initial post.  Sound like you are going to have a BLAST with the baby!  The happiest times of my life were when my kids were babies!  Isn't it GREAT?!!  :)   You are a good mother and grandmother.  Just remember though...if his parents are a bit strange and not comfortable with big crowds....they may rather do a small b'day party at their house with just SIL, your DD and baby so don't be offended if they don't attend the "big" birthday celebration with your side of family.  But of course always invite them.   My mother-in-law was a little strange and she was uneasy around people and she was sweet but she just preferred being in her own home and us visiting her with our son. Good luck!

FAFE

L, thanks for the nice words.  My biggg family does not live close by so it would be a small group for B'day parties.  I just don't want baby to think that she cannot have fun with both sets of grandparents at the same time.  Oldest grandson's other gparents are in Japan so we don't see them very much.  He calls them his old grandparents and us the young ones.  Yeah, young when you have just received your Medicare card!!!

luise.volta

People who just got their first Medicare card are not dry behind the ears yet.  I have had one for over two decades!  ;D
Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible. Dalai Lama

FAFE

Funny, Luise!  So, I'm one of the new kids on the block? 

L

I would feel the same way of course and most would....wanting both sets of grandparents there, BUT if his parents aren't going to want to, hey look at it this way..She will have TWO parties!!  haha.  That's great fun for a kid too.  More cake!   I'm sure it will work out..maybe the SIL parents will come around.  BUT  I wouldn't ever say anything else since you already said something about it.  Let your daughter and SIL figure it out and you just be supportive whatever they decide about their daughter's parties.  ;)   Meanwhile have fun buying all those precious little girl baby dresses and clothes!  I envy you!  My brother had a boy recently and I'm thrilled of course, but I love the adorable girly stuff.  Boy clothes are cute too though!  :)       

FAFE

I think I may have posted this before, but I think I am just going to have my SS check sent directly to her!!!!  OMG, I cannot walk by those cute clothes.  I have even gotten stuff for next Christmas and Valentines!  Got some great deals. 

LaurieS

Sounds like fun times with the new baby...don't forget our lessons here of, being sure to not hurt feelings here by becoming overly exuberant.  I have to ask the million dollar question.. are you buying a crib for your house as well :) 

Pen

Laurie, I was kind of thinking the same thing - take it nice and slow, FAFE....nice and slow.
Respect ... is appreciation of the separateness of the other person, of the ways in which he or she is unique.
-- Annie Gottlieb

luise.volta

Waaaaaaaaay slooooooow. Sending love...
Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible. Dalai Lama

lancaster lady

After my family trauma , I have eased back on buying every pretty thing in site for my GD.
Plus now I'm knitting for other newborns in my social circle .
Would you believe my future DIL now wonders why I'm not knitting  and buying clothes for GD .
I still give the odd gift when I visit of course but nothing on the scale I used to .
will we ever get a happy medium ??
LOL I also asked about the travel cot for my house for naps when she visits ...her reply was , If you want to ! Is that a yes or a no ??
I haven't bought one needless to say , I might just leave it , as that wasn't a joyous response .
We are now discussing THE wedding , so all good at the moment .