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Who does that????

Started by pam1, February 02, 2011, 05:03:16 pm

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LaurieS

I'd simply not answer emails or the phone.   I recently talked to my son's gf about her figure.. lol.. hope she didn't think I was creepy :)  but she's this tiny thing with tiny feet and eats like a horse.. several times a day.

Is it possible that your mil is longing for something she never had.. a proportional body  :-*

DH is her only son right

holliberri

Pam,

My MIL does this too, I think it's just being raised two different ways. I find it odd, but she has no idea why I wouldn't want toys and goodies for every holiday. And again, there is a consumer aspect of those holidays; it's pushed, it's a multi-billion dollar business, so she can't be the only one.  It must be quite common...unless you're my SIL?!

Have you tried setting boundaries? If she wants to take you out to celebrate your anniversary-great! But she can do it on a different day...tell her that day is between you and DH. And, maybe you guys should shut the phone off for that day. Make it a tradition; she'll either figure it out or keep calling to leave a voicemail. Either way, you won't get it until the next day.

As for the gifts...they spend a few days in my house and then off to Goodwill. I don't like clutter and I'm a minimalist. DH and I don't even celebrate V-day. It's her money, she can spend it the way she wants. Given that, it's not up to her decide what I choose to do with the gifts.

Also, do you have kids?  We've been phased out of gifts like that so they may go to DD. Which is great b/c I don't feel like she's wasting it on me, but bad b/c now I feel twice as guilty if they disappear.  A lot of the pressure of that stuff was taken off once DD got here.

pam1

Nope, multiple brothers too. 

Bah, I don't even think my body is all that proportional, I think she was just trying to say something to deflect why she was asking all the time.  And she's not out of shape or anything herself, even after having so many kids, you would never guess how many kids she had.  She looks pretty good.
People throw rocks at things that shine - Taylor Swift

pam1

Yes, we have kids and yes, we tried boundaries.  We are cut off now, long story.  I actually thought more people would post their "who does that?" stories lol.  I was looking for a laugh, DH came home talking about the V Day stunt she just pulled with him and it made me think of all the who does that crap.  Sometimes it sounds like a game show announcers voice in my head.

Sure, a lot of people buy into the commercialism and stuff.  But guess how many gifts we all get individually for Xmas ;) 
People throw rocks at things that shine - Taylor Swift

penelope

pam1~ my mil gave me a toilet seat for Christmas,yep thats right:) you know your mil truely hates you when you get that,we bought her house and she never had a chance to install it,so hey wrap it and give it to dil...lol

LaurieS

I don't have any odd, who does that stories.. My MIL was so normal..my mom a little off but we never worry about gifts from her, she's pretty tight with a dollar.  I'm thinking.. we are so normal we're almost boring :)

LaurieS

QuoteWe've been phased out of gifts like that so they may go to DD. Which is great b/c I don't feel like she's wasting it on me, but bad b/c now I feel twice as guilty if they disappear. 


I always had a box for each kid that I kept what I thought were precious items that may mean something to them one day.. but cute little holiday items, I did eventually just pass on to goodwill, or the trash can depending on their value.

penelope

I have a bad confession,well,it's already been told...it's about my ds in military,he knows I did this:) when he was a baby I never bought a baby book,so many years later when I finally did I couldn't remember alot of dates,almost his entire baby book is a lie!! I did save cute special things to,that he did get:b

pam1

Quote from: penelope on February 02, 2011, 07:06:29 pm
pam1~ my mil gave me a toilet seat for Christmas,yep thats right:) you know your mil truely hates you when you get that,we bought her house and she never had a chance to install it,so hey wrap it and give it to dil...lol


LOL!

I get cleaning supplies every year, without fail.  And the funny part is that she demands xmas lists from each of us.  I got tired of doing it b/c she won't take a couple suggestions, she wants brands, item #s, the store where she can get it at and she will call/email for more and more suggestions.  It's draining and takes the xmas spirit out of it for me.  So we said no, anything you get for us will be lovely.  She berated DH saying that it's not very nice of us and we are ruining her xmas and she wants to get us personal stuff.  Ok....
People throw rocks at things that shine - Taylor Swift

LaurieS

Quote from: pam1 on February 02, 2011, 07:21:56 pm
I get cleaning supplies every year, without fail.  And the funny part is that she demands xmas lists from each of us.  I got tired of doing it b/c she won't take a couple suggestions, she wants brands, item #s, the store where she can get it at and she will call/email for more and more suggestions.  It's draining and takes the xmas spirit out of it for me.  So we said no, anything you get for us will be lovely.  She berated DH saying that it's not very nice of us and we are ruining her xmas and she wants to get us personal stuff.  Ok....


Oh that would have made life so easy...
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Pen

SM & DF showed up without warning one Boxing Day and gave us ....wait for it (does anyone say that anymore?)......the bone from their Christmas ham. The bone! No meat, they'd eaten it all with her kids for Christmas dinner.

I'd rather have had a new toilet seat.
Respect ... is appreciation of the separateness of the other person, of the ways in which he or she is unique.
-- Annie Gottlieb

penelope

lol..you can clean my toilet seat!! my mil always wanted reciepts,honestly i think she was pocketing the cash:) she was financially sound so there was no need to..she bought bulk balloons once,didn't use 2 of them,tried to return them the girl said no,your mouth may have been on them,she threw a fit in the store over 56 cents,I felt like crawling under a table :b

Pooh

I was forming a response and then saw where you went this more as a humor thing....Oh I'm there.

My first marriage, I had the MIL from hades and she enjoyed tormenting me.  This was one of my "Who does that?" moments.  She would come in my house and contantly berate me about my living room curtains.  Ok, I had a nice set of living room curtains, but she always let me know that I was supposed to change out my curtains every 3 months, with the seasons.  She had a set of curtains for Spring, Summer, Fall and Winter and didn't I know any better?  Well, apparently not because I only took them down every once in a while to wash them and back up!  Curtains are expensive!  But she really did do that at her house and I used to think "Who does that?"  She also had new bedroom comforters, in every bedroom, for every season and I caught flack for having the same ones all the time.

Ok, so maybe some of you will come back and say, "Yeah, that is the proper thing to do", but ummm....I still don't.
We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us. -
Joseph Campbell

holliberri

Pooh,

My MIL does that stuff too.

I remember watching Along Came Polly where Ben Stiller is saving all of the decorative pillows in the chest by the window.

Jennifer Aniston is like, "What's the point?"

That simple scene has saved me a ton of money buying things like dishes for a preset table, holiday comforters, decorative pillows, jewelry, multiple scarves. If it's not going to get used, and I just have to move it, I'm not buying it.

Pooh

I'm with you Holli.  I hate stuff sitting everywhere that I just have to pick up and dust all the time.  But, I have to do it with this DH because he has huge collections.  They are beautiful and he takes great pride in them, so I keep dusting them....but I hate it.
We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us. -
Joseph Campbell