snapped olive branch~

[Pooh]

Isn't it sad?  I am ashamed to say, I never even thought about that when we were at my YS's grad.  I know this sounds bad, but I never would have imagined these men and women standing there with no one there to congratulate them.  Duh!

I finally looked at my YS and asked him why there were a bunch of them still standing in formation after they released them to the families.  He explained that was the Soldiers that didn't have anyone there and had to wait until they were officially released back to their barracks.  I couldn't help but cry and then he told me we could adopt one of them for the day!  YAY! Then....Only one?  So he pointed to one that he really got along with during training and we asked the DS if we could have him!  He was so grateful and polite all day and I will never forget the thank you he gave us later.  He hugged me and told me that he very much appreciated letting him be part of our family that day.

[luise.volta]

I can see how hard this all is and don't have anything to add except to send love...

[LaurieS]

Pooh that made me cry ...

We just watched a documentary called "The Way We Get By", here is the description.. it was rather touching, we had rented it through Blockbuster

Synopsis of The Way We Get By

American service men and women are a frequent sight at the Bangor International Airport in Maine; many troops returning from overseas assignments pass through the airport as they make their way home or to their next mission. Since the United States invasion of Iraq in 2003, over 800,000 U.S. soldiers have arrived at Bangor International, and nearly all of them have been met by Bill Knight, Joan Gaudet, and Jerry Mundy. Calling themselves "the Maine Troop Greeters," Knight, Gaudet, and Mundy are three senior citizens who see to it that every soldier returning to America is given a warm and encouraging welcome, a hug or a handshake, and the use of a cell phone so they can call their loved ones, no matter when their plane touches down. While the Greeters have their own troubles to deal with -- failing health, the loss of loved ones, loneliness -- their work with the soldiers gives them both a sense of purpose and a perspective that makes their own troubles easier to bear. Joan Gaudet's son Aron Gaudet is a filmmaker, and his documentary The Way We Get By chronicles the work of the Maine Troop Greeters, the story behind the three tireless volunteers, and how their project has touched the men and women they welcome nearly every day. The Way We Get By was an official selection at the 2009 South By Southwest Film Festival. ~ Mark Deming, Rovi

[penelope]

well chatted with my ds tonight via FB,I asked him "quick question,honesty" so he knows answer the truth no matter how harsh,he said "okay" we do this and if he doesn't wanna answer he just says no,I said i've done alot of reading and asking others,when guys come home they don't wanna have alot of ppl there,alot of times it's just wives,if you don't want us there it's fine,we'll see you when you come home~he said mom you have no idea how excited I am to see you guys,do I want a bunch of aunts and uncles there,no, but I do want you and dad and would love my bros to but I understand they can't,then told me he loved me,I teared up:b so I will go down,smile ,HUG my ds and Thank them all for what they do~his unit is in an extremely violent part of Afghan,one of the units fighting with him have lost 24 Marines since Oct~I have had the honor of meeting so many Blue Star and Gold Star parents~when I hug my son,it will also be for all those who are awaiting the arrival of their sons/daughters and those who will never beable to hug theirs ever again~I seen a qoute once about military parents "we didn't choose this,we were drafted" lol Thank You ladies for adopting a troop,alot of them truely have no families,alot go from foster care to service,I do alot of charity work with the troops and these guys deserve the best homecoming ever~and BIG HUGS to all who have loved a service member and ones deployed in time of war~it's hard to explain what it does to you~I met a parent whos son was missing for years over there,they finally were able to lay him to rest~19 yr old kid~I hope I can truely get past this with the dil,but to know how much we just wanna welcome him home and be silent on details is harsh~ ladies if your in a place waiting on the big snow,bundle up and have a great day~

[penelope]

laurie,I will rent that doc,we enjoy that stuff~

[luise.volta]

His choice. That's wonderful an dhow it should be. Good for you for getting the straight scoop. Sending love...

[holliberri]

Penelope,

I can't go back and read your old post, but if I'm not confusing you with someone else...he wanted you to be there. Isn't this his second deployment? Last time you didn't have a big to-do and he was disappointed, right?

You already knew all along he wanted you there. That's all you need. No matter what happens, please remember that. You're doing this for him...to me, you don't need to worry about anything else.

[Rose799]

I will go down,smile ,HUG my ds and Thank them all for what they do~

I haven't posted but have been following your posts, Penelope.  This one brought tears...  To you dm's with sons in the service, please thank them on behalf of family, as well.   I live near a base but am far enough removed that I don't know anyone in the service personally.  If you have a suggestions as to what those of us like me can do to help out, please share.   Penelope, I hope you greet your son wearing bells & screaming like a crazy woman.  You may opt not to, but I'm going to envision it that way.   

Hugs,
Rose

[holliberri]

Rose,

I can go on and on:

1. If you see a USO (airports, main cities), donate a dollar. Those senior citizens running them are ALL volunteer and have usually served themselves. Better yet, spend a few minutes in there talking to the volunteer and the servicemembers that come in there. It's amazing who is passing through there.
2. Donate old books to the base...they ship them overseas.
3. Send anonymous care packages: socks, underwear, dryer sheets, toilet paper
4. If you can, spend some time at a Veteran's Office and spend some time with the servicemembers in rehab.
5. Send Christmas Cards and a letter about yourself overseas; there are men and women over there with no family back here to write them.
6. If you live near a base and know of a spouse of someone deployed...offer help; they probably won't take it, but it is nice ot know it's there.
7. If you see someone in uniform, thank them. They don't even expect that, but it means more than all of the above.

There's tons more you can do.

[Rose799]

Thanks for the suggestions, Holliberri,

Just maybe I can adopt some "ds's" like Luise has "dd's."    

...and thanks to your husband for his service, as well!

[LaurieS]

The evening my son was commissioned we went out to dinner afterwards.. Five different people approached my son and a friend to shake their hands, one saluted my son said no sir, it's you I owe this honor.  In this world where we've become so afraid of interacting with strangers, I found this to be incredibly touching.  I've seen little children approach him at their father's encouragement to ask him about when his dream of being a pilot begin. He always replies the same way.... when I was your age. 

I can not listen to the National Anthem without a tear any longer because it seems so unfair to be standing at some pleasurable event knowing that someone lost their child so I can enjoy whatever I choose to do.  I've been crying at the playing of the Anthem for years because I always knew that at least one of my kids would be heading this direction.

I always try to keep in mind that these are not all of our heroes .. my dd is dating a police officer.. talk about a high risk, under appreciated job.. no one ever thinks to just shake their hand and say thanks.

Your list was wonderful Holliberri.. I"m sending my son a package this week with some items he requested.. I think I'll put something in the box for his temporary roommate.. who knows maybe he hasn't gotten anything from home.

[luise.volta]

Great Idea! 

[Pen]

Quite awe inspiring. Thanks to all who have sons, daughters, spouses, and other loved ones in the service. Thanks to all who serve on our behalf.

[penelope]

Holliberry,very well put~on the carepackages,you can contact the chaplins and they can give them to the ones in need~we always sent 3 or 4 at a time,my son and his guys would dump it in a pile and share,so no one was left out,I would send all kinds of things,but you cannot send,pork,cigerettes lighters,anything with women on it,magazines(porn) a big no no,no fresh produce,no greenery,you can go on sites and get the lists,on my sons base if they were cought recieving things on the No list they could lose mail privilages,they have all that stuff there,someones getting it to them:) I have been involved with groups(moms) of all branches,but I'm more involved with the Marines,once your loved one is in,they take the whole family in,we have a weird bond,i meet so many wonderful people,hugs galore:) I make sure I Thank everyone~when I worked I waited on officers daily,what a great group of guys,they do tend to get overlooked for their service and sacrifice~@ Holliberry,my son does love the Marines and did wanna be deployed,this is what he's trained for,he has his days tho,a few weeks ago he said doing my 5 years then done,last night he said he didn't mind being in Afghan~the USO is the ones doing the ceremony dinner when they come home,I've never dealt with them so I'm excited to meet some ppl and see about helping out in my area:) I hate to ramble on,sorry,but I'm very into helping,I have also worked in soup kitchens~so if ever a way to help someone in any situation it's appreciated more than we ever know~also,there are young kids in bootcamp not recieving mail,my son said it was the only thing to look forward to,I found some names of kids who weren't getting any mail...sent out info via FB and from what I gather my friends came thru:) or the VA,we were told here cards and letters were no longer allowed,ppl were sending hate mail,can you imagine how that would feel~but other VA's allow mail I'm sure. The troops love getting letters from the schools,the younger grades are so cute,I can no longer read the older kids letters,I would spend the entire packing party crying:b hard candy,their mouths get really dry so they like that,pack stuff in zip lock baggies,sand gets in everything...okay,sorry for going on and on:) oh 1 more thing,most ground units have bomb sniffing dogs,so a pack of dog treats is always good,we tend to forget the 4 legged troops:) make sure no pork in it tho,who knows how strict they'll be~

[Pooh]

Laurie, that is an amazing story.  I need to watch it if I can get through it without tears.  Penelope, kudos for asking straight up what your Son wanted.  I'm with Holli, since he said he wants you there, go and don't worry about the rest.  Just remember if DIL is there to let her have first hugs and the first little bit.  Let your DS decide when to come to you.  Rose, I am with the others.  My YS said his favorite thing is receiving letters, cards and gift packages.  Check with someone there on your base as to what they can get.  I have found that each base is different with things they can receive, and will get punished for the wrong things.  Every time my YS is transferred to another base, we go over what he can have at this one.  Also, it depends on what stage they are at.  During basic, they could not receive anything except what he asked for.  One of things that he asked for, that I never thought, was knee high panty hose (black).  During long hikes and such, they wear them under their socks to keep from getting blisters from the boots.  He went through tons of those, but I found if I went to our local dollar stores (you know the chains) I could get a six pack for $2.00.  And chapstick, lots of chapstick.  Now my YS is at a point right now that he can get almost anything, so check with your local base.

Laurie, you are right about Law Enforcement.  Very rarely do they get thanked.  My DH always says, "Everyone loves a Fireman."