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MIL and comparisons

Started by stilltrying2010, May 13, 2011, 06:13:48 AM

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lancaster lady

ST:

when you say the IL's are coming to visit , do they stay with you ?
As you said they come for a really long  time !! how on earth are you expected to cope with a newborn
and the IL's ?
If this is the case I would certainly mention it on day one , if the comparisons start , otherwise you are in
for a very tiresome visit at a very vulnerable time .

Pen

LL, I'm with you. New baby & long IL visit? Even under the best of circumstances it could be tiresome.

Good one, Laurie! Are you about up to here w/wedding chatter, LOL? It actually must be exciting - enjoy it! Living vicariously through you (again.) And you're right, some people never get tired of their favorite topic.

Pam, that seems fair and comfortable for all involved.

Sassy, the "teachable moment" is a good idea, too. You guys are so smart! Depending on the people involved and the immediate situation, there are a lot of options that don't have to result in hurt feelings/meltdowns. I just hope I can remember them when faced with interrruptions, LOL.

ST, I hope whatever tack you take works. Best wishes.
Respect ... is appreciation of the separateness of the other person, of the ways in which he or she is unique.
-- Annie Gottlieb

stilltrying2010

I cant tell you how much you all have given me to think about!  I liked the idea about someone (sorry, I forgot whose) DD is getting married & "The Wedding" is injected into everything - Imagine listening to that for 6 years - yikes!  I knwo that the right thing is fr me to "get it out there" but have to be able to keep my negative feelings in check.  I like the teachable momen concept - I watch Cesar - I know an old dog can learn new trick (Dog whispherer - only joking, besides MIL isnt that old ony 59).  MIL has not let us know her travel plans yet (we are the last to know with an arrival date and and estimated date of departure). 

Trying to keep an open mind & heart...  thanks again