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stressed but better now

Started by L, March 04, 2011, 11:32:19 AM

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L

March 04, 2011, 11:32:19 AM
Well, today is the daughter's birthday.  I sent her a text this morning saying simply, Happy Birthday.  I almost did not do even that as she has been so horrible and I've been so hurt.  But I did and suprisingly she sent a text back saying Thanks.  Really did not expect her to reply at all because she has been so nasty.  So, now I just have to play it cool and let her reach out from now on out and hopefully down the road we can patch things up to at least the point so we won't be totally estranged as we have been.  I don't want to let her think I will put up with any crap from her like in the past either though..because I can't live that way any more.  So will always have to be aware because I was always one to just take the verbal abuse and so readily forgive and it would just stay that way always...like most of us mothers!  :-\ So, maybe there is hope I can get some respect at least from now on out.  Honestly, it will probably never be even close to the way I would like, but I am trying to love myself for once and not let her or any other family members treat me badly any more.  Well, thanks for listening.  This site is really helpful and a saving grace for me.  Have a good weekend ladies!  :)   

luise.volta

March 04, 2011, 11:58:16 AM #1
While you are learning to love yourself...we are all loving you, too!  :D
Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible. Dalai Lama

Pooh

March 04, 2011, 12:18:59 PM #2
Good job L.  You have a great weekend too!
We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us. -
Joseph Campbell

Faithlooksup

March 04, 2011, 03:22:51 PM #3
Hi L,  Your daughters reply is "a good thing.." :)  Better than nothing at all...Keep up the good work...  Have a wonderful weekend also....

L

March 04, 2011, 05:33:07 PM #4
thank you ladies. 

Pen

March 04, 2011, 08:37:39 PM #5
I with Faith, it's a good thing. Don't overanalyze it. You're doing great, L! What are you going to do for yourself this weekend?
Respect ... is appreciation of the separateness of the other person, of the ways in which he or she is unique.
-- Annie Gottlieb

Huni

March 08, 2011, 11:32:14 AM #6
L, I am happy that you sent the text message for your daughter's birthday because I think you were wanting to do it and were looking for affirmation.  I am so happy that your daughter answered the text with a Thanks.  Perhaps there are better things to come.  Don't get impatient.  In the meantime.....It's L's day, do things that make you happy. 

Tara

March 08, 2011, 05:00:14 PM #7
Hi L

I'm glad your dd responded.  I think that is a positive sign, but agree that its better not to make any assumptions about the future.
Just a day at a time.  I'm also a mom who took abuse from my adult child and very much regret it.  Its good your stopping it  now!

How long have you two been estranged?

blessings, Tara

jill

March 08, 2011, 07:53:24 PM #8
Dear L,
I am glad to hear you texted your daughter on her birthday, and that she replied.  She knows you love her and were thinking of her.    It's amazing how a little contact can lift your spirits, hopefully there will be more in the future.
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