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Dil blues with hubbys family

Started by lmesich, December 27, 2010, 03:58:35 PM

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lmesich

We went there for the first time with my kids for Xmas eve in 7 years. to make a long story short, they wanted to but my two teen boys in a totally separate room to eat, a room that was in no way vi sable to everyone else.my husbands other brother girlfriends son (who is the same age) was going to be allowed to sit at the main table. I protested and said i am going to sit with my kids. fail made a stink and set up a card table in the main room-which they should have done in the first place.
later in the evening we were dragged into the living to "open presents". actually only one present was given to my kids and all the other kids got  6 or more presents. now my kids aren't babies, but still, they got their feelings hurt. it was so ridiculous i couldn't believe it. what i was thinking is not ever going again, but now what i am going to do is go next time and bring huge amounts of stuff for my kids to open in front of them.
it was so ignorant that i feel sorry that they didn't even seem to get it.
Also they had seating arrangements noticed all the stuff i noticed. it is unreal how they could continually be so rude and not noticed. than at the end of the day when we where leaving his dad picks up a big hershy bar and starts to tell me that "this is uncle Stan's tradition, every year he gives this out to everyone" i say "oh really, this is the first time me and my kids have gotten one in 9 years" they live in denial and ignorance. i am so sick of them and hope i never have to go there again. just ventting.

luise.volta

I'm sick of them, too! POX ON 'EM! I mean it! Sending love...
Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible. Dalai Lama

Faithlooksup

Hello Imesich,  I am so sorry that this had to happen...Perhaps lovingly said~"a lesson learned!?"  Do not put yourself thru that any more-nor your family--you are to good for that.....!Next time if you happen to receive an invite, just kindly state and with a smile on your face :)~"How wonderful, but I am sorry we have already made plans."  And your plans will be with you and your family without them.....Do not fall prey to that again.
Become better and stronger~~you simply do not need them in your world.

I can remember when I was married and MIL/FIL lived out of state.  MIL would mail a huge box of Christmas gifts which were all and only for her DS (nothing for me at all) and that was OK, yes I did hurt horribly as the X opened all 8-10 gifts~and my family brought gifts for him--how about that.  However my family is what mattered--not his....And now we have been divorced for 21 years his Mother can have him, tho I doubt she wants him now.  It was just a hurt I will never in my life forget, and a hurt I will never do to another.

Become stronger and better thru this....we are always here..Hugs and Peace, Faith

L

That's awful.  Some people are so rude.  I don't know how some people live with themselves.  I just wouldn't go again at Christmas or holidays.  Especially if your boys feelings were hurt...why make them suffer more hurt?!  It might be worse next time!  Go visit them at other times of the year instead.  You can still be courteous and send them a gift in the mail and call them on Christmas and hopefully they will have the sense to mail your boys something too.  Good luck.