The Awakening...this gave me hope...

[Nana]

Thanks Seasage for sharing the author's name and site.
I had been looking for the article to no avail because couldnt remember the author.
Thanks

[Nana]

Dear Barelythere:

A down day....we all have.  Cheer up girl... on this side of the world....we all love you and wish you the best.  I have been there many a times.....and I didnt know this site existed.  Your heart is blessed indeed.... keep it tight....dont let them touch that part of you.   We have a life Barelythere....we wanted to be part of theirs.....but they got to decide to what extent.... We have many sources for love.....just sometimes we have to look elsewhere.   In this side of the world... we all love you and wish you the best.     Your son loves you too in his own way.....let it be.......he will change overtime....I can assure you.  Just dont beg......if we lose our dignity we are losing ourselves.  We all lose it or some time....but then again.....lets get it back for our own well-being.

Love you Barelythere....a big bear hug....all for you.

[luise.volta]

I learned in a little different situation to imagine anything I said in the headlines of the evening news.

[luise.volta]

I love your posts, Nana! 

[barelythere]

Dear Barelythere:

A down day....we all have.  Cheer up girl... on this side of the world....we all love you and wish you the best.  I have been there many a times.....and I didnt know this site existed.  Your heart is blessed indeed.... keep it tight....dont let them touch that part of you.   We have a life Barelythere....we wanted to be part of theirs.....but they got to decide to what extent.... We have many sources for love.....just sometimes we have to look elsewhere.   In this side of the world... we all love you and wish you the best.     Your son loves you too in his own way.....let it be.......he will change overtime....I can assure you.  Just dont beg......if we lose our dignity we are losing ourselves.  We all lose it or some time....but then again.....lets get it back for our own well-being.

Love you Barelythere....a big bear hug....all for you.

You're wonderful, Nana....love you

[Nana]

Thanks Luise and Barely

We are all here to support each other....we have all walked through muddy road so we know perfectly well what it feels. 

Love you wonderful ladies

[Pen]

Dear Barleythere

She we all permit it for sometime.  It is so hard to take a decision to back off because we want to be near them.  We are powerless and fearful and with beautiful dreams and expectations.  eIn permitting all these we gave them permission to degrade our soul and mind.  Good that we reacted later....better late than never. 

Barely...as I had said before....things only change positive when I reacted back. 

Good luck

Love you Barely

I know I need to react back but with my heart, it will be so hard for me.  They knew all I wanted was a family.  I think my DIL and son thinks they are giving me one with the times we see them but I guess it's not like I had hoped for.  It was great when I was a slave to her but she has others to do what she wants now.  I think I'm having a down day today.  Maybe tomorrow will be better.  I hope so.

I understand the down day, for sure. I hope you feel better soon.

[Renet]

Seasage...I love how you edited it....  They must be about the same age......as that name was popular at the time too....  And it's my daughter who wants me to be perfect and can not love me because I am not.....And all the gift giving and phone calls and special attention has never changed her.... 

I realized last year when I started doing small triathlons that I wanted her to be proud of me more than I wanted to do them......Is that sad or what?   Do you know what her response was when I told her that I, (an overweight middle aged couch potato) was doing a sprint triathlon (which is a 500 meter swim, 12 mile bike ride and 5k run or walk and I did not even know how to swim a year ago)  Erica's response was.... "that's not even a real triathlon."

We deserve the things that come to us as a condition of being human.....  There needs to be opposition in all things in order to understand the good.  Pain and sorrow.  Joy and Healing.  I am so aware and much more appreciative of the love of 3 of my children, because I know the hate of one of them....Opposition in all things...to understand the good...

It's so true the things that are hardest for us strengthen us the greatest.....  I love the saying about...."We can not avoid the storms but we can learn to dance in the rain....."

Thank you again to all of you for being my strength.....for leading by the hand and teaching me to dance during this storm in my life...

[luise.volta]

Please leave given names out of posts just to be cautious. Thanks. I use them because it is my site and I am very visible but everyone else is wise to aim at some level of anonymity.

[Renet]

Luise....Thank you for reminding us to keep names out.....I think I write before I read!!!!    Is there a place to find out what all the abbreviations do mean....Sometimes I am not sure.... Like  DS...... 

I am so grateful for this site and these other women.....  I can do it Luise...I can stand up to my Daughter because of the support on this website.....   When I think of her, and start to feel sad because of the Holidays coming up....and when I want to pick up the phone and call her, or write an email and tell her I am sorry....(which is so dumb)  I come on here.....It is just so much better and healthy for me...and then I can do it one more day....

I truly love you all......

[luise.volta]

Go to our Home Page and scroll down to Resources. You will find them there. (I personally love FOO (family Of Origin.) We just make them up as we go along. DS is dear Son. MESS is Me Every Second Saturday. (I'm kidding!)

[Renet]

OD my DWF!!    Thanks a whole big bunch for all you do for my OH

(Okie Dokie)   (Dear Newest Friend)  (Owie Heart)     :  )

[luise.volta]

LOL!

[seasage]

I realized last year when I started doing small triathlons that I wanted her to be proud of me more than I wanted to do them......Is that sad or what?   Do you know what her response was when I told her that I, (an overweight middle aged couch potato) was doing a sprint triathlon (which is a 500 meter swim, 12 mile bike ride and 5k run or walk and I did not even know how to swim a year ago)  Erica's response was.... "that's not even a real triathlon."

Well, I am proud of you for your triathlons.  Tell us where your next one is, and we will come and cheer you on.  We have an Olympic gold medalist in my family, and I know he would be proud of you too.  Your DD is mistaken: real athletes know how hard it is to accomplish any of those things!  I hope you are proud of yourself for your accomplishments. 

[luise.volta]

Wow!! Seasage!