Author Topic: Pooh, where are you?  (Read 665 times)

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Offline luise.volta

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Pooh, where are you?
« on: April 11, 2017, 04:38:08 PM »
It's been months. I'm worried. Love you!

Here' my email: luise.volta@gmail.com
"Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes it's a quiet voice at the end of the day saying, I'll try again tomorrow." -- Mary Ann Radmacher

Offline Pen

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Re: Pooh, where are you?
« Reply #1 on: April 12, 2017, 12:51:38 PM »
I'm also concerned. We miss ya, Pooh!
Respect ... is appreciation of the separateness of the other person, of the ways in which he or she is unique.
-- Annie Gottlieb

Offline luise.volta

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Re: Pooh, where are you?
« Reply #2 on: April 12, 2017, 01:52:58 PM »
Emailing you, Pen. Hugs...
"Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes it's a quiet voice at the end of the day saying, I'll try again tomorrow." -- Mary Ann Radmacher

Offline Bamboo2

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Re: Pooh, where are you?
« Reply #3 on: April 12, 2017, 02:34:27 PM »
Hope everything's okay, Pooh.  Hugs!!

Offline Justbreathe

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Re: Pooh, where are you?
« Reply #4 on: April 12, 2017, 03:07:52 PM »
Oh No.. this isn't good. Months? Check in, Pooh..


Offline Pooh

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Re: Pooh, where are you?
« Reply #5 on: April 17, 2017, 05:29:42 AM »
I'm alive and kicking! 

I've been checking off and on, but I've seriously just been extremely busy.  We have found our current house is not going to be "aging friendly".  Stairs and
other things got us both thinking that we probably need to think of the future years.  So we've spent the last 2 months, repairing, painting, etc. to get it ready for the market.
My realtor is sending a stager in tonight, and then a photographer Wednesday, so hopefully it will be up by next week.

In the meantime, as things go, we started looking in case it sold quickly, which they seem to think it will sell very quickly.  And of course, Murphy's Law, we found a house we love!
So have been trying to talk the seller into taking a contract based on our house selling. 

Had a couple of surgeries on my bum arm, but that's doing much better.

As far as kids/grandkids go...my good ones moved back to Texas right before Christmas.  Just BAM!  Gone.  So I miss my GC, but I still get to Skype.  My bad situation with oldest DS has had
no changed in 5 years.  So I guess I have finally reached a place in my life where I have accepted everything.  It is what it is and I'm at peace with it finally.  I can honestly say I just wish them the
best in life and have moved on.

This place was my saving grace when all was going on.  My sanity was seriously in question some days and I didn't think I would survive other days.  The pain and grief were overwhelming.  But,
once I realized that I hadn't done anything, got through the anger, the days/weeks got better.  And now I finally feel completely at peace with the situation.  I decided I was going to forgive them.
Just me...by myself one day...told myself that I wasn't hurting as bad and that I needed to forgive them for myself.  It was my final thing that allowed me to move on for good.

There is no magic pill.  There is no one-size-fits-all solution.  It's an individual journey for each person and one that you must travel.  You can not get where you are going without putting a foot on each
leg of the trip.  Look around, take in the sights and move to the next trail.  Each trail is full of peril, danger, pain, laughs, tears and anger.  Be prepared to fight demons blocking the path. 
The only thing you can not do is hide from the demon, or sit down on the trail and give up.  Finish each segment and proceed forward.  Oh there were times I lingered on certain paths and turned them
into a rest stop, but I had to force myself to continue on after spending a few weeks at the vending machine.

I can not thank Luise, Pen and others here that have come and gone for all the help, guidance and love that has been shown to me on this trip.  Luise has always given a safe place to land, or some extra
quarters for the vending machine.  And let's not forget the behind-the-scenes guru Kirk.  You have an amazing Son Luise to share his time with all of us.

I will check in from time to time to see how everyone is doing, but where once I lived here, I feel like I need to become an occasional visitor now. 

I love you all and please don't give up on yourselves.  My wish is for everyone here to find peace in their situation.  Life is too short to waste our years in torment.  Life is meant to be lived.
We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us. -
Joseph Campbell

Offline gettingoldandcranky

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Re: Pooh, where are you?
« Reply #6 on: April 17, 2017, 07:07:34 AM »
thanks pooh.  nice to read where you are now.  happy for you!

Offline luise.volta

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Re: Pooh, where are you?
« Reply #7 on: April 17, 2017, 07:49:32 AM »
Thank you for your tireless eight years as a Moderator here, Pooh, and for sharing your deep healing. Drop in any time! Love, Luise
"Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes it's a quiet voice at the end of the day saying, I'll try again tomorrow." -- Mary Ann Radmacher

Offline shiny

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Re: Pooh, where are you?
« Reply #8 on: April 18, 2017, 03:13:32 PM »
Pooh, your post is bittersweet ... glad you've reached that plateau of peace. I think that's what all of us here are longing for! But, am sad that you won't be a regular contributor. You've given much wisdom to the forum. Will miss you greatly and thank you for your sharing. Because of this wonderful website, I'm on my way to healing -- still have to step around some landmines --  but I now know where they are!

Offline Bamboo2

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Re: Pooh, where are you?
« Reply #9 on: April 18, 2017, 03:51:56 PM »
Thanks for sharing the latest part of your journey, Pooh!  So uplifting and inspiring!  Your sage wisdom will live on here at WWU and will help untold numbers of hurting women on their journeys.  I'm so glad to have benefited from your pearls.  My favorite line (and there are many!) from you is when you suggested I tell my DD that I can't give a free pass to someone (her abusive and freeloading BF) who has continually made life hard for her.  That line was a game-changer for me.  You nailed our concerns, and made it accessible for her to understand why we did not want him in our lives anymore.  And just last weekend when that same BF (or maybe now ex-BF who is desperate to do anything to get her back) called me and DH out of the blue and after a couple of years to - ahem - "apologize" for whatever, I remembered that "free pass" line, and it was easy to just dismiss anything he said as "blah-blah-blah."   Fool me once.....

Wish you all the best, Pooh!
Sending love  :D

Offline Marina

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Re: Pooh, where are you?
« Reply #10 on: April 18, 2017, 04:44:42 PM »
Pooh, I'm fairly new to this site, but I have enjoyed your old posts.  You sound like fun!  I wish you the best in your future adventures.  I do hope you come back to visit sometimes. 

Offline luise.volta

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Re: Pooh, where are you?
« Reply #11 on: April 18, 2017, 05:09:09 PM »
A little history: Pooh came to WWU May, 10, 2010, a year after I created this Website. She posted the highest number of posts of any member outside of myself in the seven years she was with us, 5436! I don't have the date I made her a Moderator. There were four of us but eventually we lost two moderators. Pooh, Pen and I decided we could manage without adding new ones. We started out as MILU - Mothers in Law Unite but it didn't take long to realize that daughters in law were being drawn to our site...so I changed our name after about a year to Wise Women Unite. And you did! Hugs!
"Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes it's a quiet voice at the end of the day saying, I'll try again tomorrow." -- Mary Ann Radmacher

Offline Pooh

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Re: Pooh, where are you?
« Reply #12 on: April 19, 2017, 11:16:30 AM »
Aww thanks guys.  Ya'll can't get rid of my sarcastic self that easy.  I'll be around.  Thank you for all of the kind words.

And hang in there guys!  I promise you there is light at the end of the tunnel if that's where you want to be.
We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us. -
Joseph Campbell

Offline Pen

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Re: Pooh, where are you?
« Reply #13 on: April 20, 2017, 10:09:33 AM »
Pooh, you've been a dear WWU pal and mentor to me! I'm so happy you've found that great, peaceful, forgiving space. Although we miss your daily presence this is what we hope for all WWU members!

As you so eloquently stated, there is no one size fits all solution. We're on our own path and going at our own pace. There may also be an ebb & flow (steps forward, steps back, then a big breakthrough.) We're at different points on the trail. I laughed at your vending machine reference, I have been stuck there many times myself  :P

I'll be thinking of you & cheering you on in your new ventures! It'll be good to hear from you when you do check in. Much love  :-*
Respect ... is appreciation of the separateness of the other person, of the ways in which he or she is unique.
-- Annie Gottlieb